Eating healthily for £25 a week

lynzpower

LilacPixie wrote: »

Ames you must remember your benefits are higher because you are ill. As is said I thing your sister needs to learn to cope within her budget, if that means she gets a trashed credit rating then so be it. Maybe a few weeks/months of coping on JSA would spur her into looking harder for a job or taking a job just anywhere to meet the bills and her tastes.

I agree with this, even if you used the money to make your own diet better. :cool:

One though I had about this was when I used to work with clients on JSA, not only did they eata lot of expensive processed foods, but also they had few "implements"

If you wanted to help with a token per week, what about helping set up the kitchen- stick blenders are a fiver upward, and can make brilliant sauces and smoothies and soups with it, baking dishes, cake tins, "the right" oven trays, potato mashers etc, I was horrified to see some clients without even a peeler or choppingboards, one client told me if she wanted a toss up of what to buy with her last pound, she wouldnt buy a chopping board but a frozen lasagne. I have a brilliant book i picked up in a cheapie books shop called 100 easy rices and risottos. abit like this one?
http://www.amazon.co.uk/Risotto-Recipes-Know-how-Italys-Famous/dp/0304350109/ref=sr_1_11?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1249320411&sr=8-11

Might be nice small token gifts that might make her feel more confient in the kitchen without breaking the bank and they are empowering as opposed to allowing her to stay dependent

Good luck!

clutterydrawer

Ames wrote: »

elona, she doesn't think there should be disability benefits at all (or for single mothers) as everyone on them is fiddling the system. And she doesn't think I'm as ill as I am anway.

:eek::eek:

I was trying to be understanding to all parties till I read this. How harsh of her.

Look after yourself, you are poorly and you should concentrate on keeping yourself warm and well fed rather than trying to help someone who clearly won't be helped. she will muddle through somehow.

greenbee

You need to put yourself first, and I hope all the comments on here have helped you to realise that its not a selfish thing to do.

Hopefully your sister will read this thread and realise that SHE'S the one in the wrong, not you.

Concentrate on eating well yourself and getting your home sorted out so that you can enjoy living there. If you want some guidance and support as to how to get to grips with cleaning it up, join in with the flylady thread. There are other people on it who are unwell or have disabilities, but who still find the lists useful and get a sense of satisfaction out of listing their achievements!

Skintslimmer

Oh dear, seems a classic case of taking money from her family for granted.

Please - the best thing you and your dad can do is to stop providing her with money - let her know you will be there for her to discuss budgets/economy etc etc, but what right does she think she has to live on the premium brands when she can't afford it herself?!

buxtonrabbitgreen

Your sister has a cheek. Just leave her to it as she has decided she will do anyway. My sister is on JSA and really struggles. She lives alone as her kids are in foster homes at the moment. But out of her jobseekers she still has to pay fines for her ds who was in a lot of trouble at one time. So she has to pay £30 per month for them. Also fares to visit her kids 50 miles away. And she manages, just. When I visit I take her a few groceries and a fiver as I don't have money to spare either.

ceridwen

My gawd - she wants it every which way doesnt she? She wants you to subsidise her - while she does precisely nothing to pay you back.

I would have thought the least she could have done Ames in return for your financial support would be to help out with the cleaning. This could have worked out quite well if she'd been fair - you could have given her that portion of your Disability Benefit that you reckon has been given to you to cover you getting a bit of "home help" and she in return could have been that "home help" - and neither of you mentioning anything about it to the DWP. But - nope - she messed up by thinking it was all going to be just one way - ie you give and she takes.

From what you say about your father having subsidised her as well - well I'm getting the picture of your sister as being someone who thinks the "world owes her a living". She needs to live ITRW - in which people have both rights and responsibilities and things have to go both ways. Time she grew up - I know, I know...some people never DO grow up....but you get my drift.

Ames

I don't know, she does always go on about how she wants to get a job, she's different to most of the wasters on JSA because she does want a job etc.

She has *everything* you could need for a kitchen, blender, food processor, slow cooker, grill machine, every kind of knife and hand held implement... Although she does need small cake tins with moveable bases, she wanted me to look out for some for her.

greenbee

Ames wrote: »

Although she does need small cake tins with moveable bases, she wanted me to look out for some for her.

You don't NEED cake tins... so sorry, I think those can go on a Christmas/birthday present list as a nice-to-have.

Given that she's got all this kitchen equipment, maybe she'd like to do some cooking for your freezer, so that when you have a bad day, you've got stuff you can microwave easily.

Mind you, I can't see that she needs it, given that she likes her pasta sauces out of jars, and uses casserole mixes... maybe she could let you have a few bits and pieces of useful kit!

I hope we've convinced you to put yourself first (and try to persuade your dad to do the same). Tell her its tough love, and you're doing it for her own good so that she learns to stand on her own two feet... and that it's about time she gave something back, so if she's not going to help you out, maybe she could do some volunteering in between job-hunting. I think she needs to do something for others and remember that life isn't about putting yourself at the centre of the universe, but about being part of a community.

Floss

Ames wrote: »

She has *everything* you could need for a kitchen, blender, food processor, slow cooker, grill machine, every kind of knife and hand held implement... Although she does need small cake tins with moveable bases, she wanted me to look out for some for her.

Is she planning to start up a business as a caterer or cake maker? If not then she doesn't need cake tins then! And I'm sure she has more time than you do to go out looking for things for her own kitchen!

I'm sorry that I appear to be negative, but I think she is draining both you & your father, particularly when you need help & support to cope with your own health & activity problems.

Ames

Greenbee, I offered to pay her to do some batch cooking for me and she said yes, but since this big argument I can't see it happening.

I've suggested volunteering, I know of at least 3 or 4 local charities/projects that would love the skills she got in her technical degree. She doesn't want to do too much of it though because she says if it goes on her CV she'll never get a job in the industry because too much community work and that's all she'll be good for.

She wanted the cake tins to make individual cheesecakes instead of the massive ones she usually makes.

She does cook desserts from scratch, but main meals tend to be packets. For instance, when ex was here chicken fajitas was a nice cheap meal, whatever veg was in the fridge, a couple of wraps, a bit of chicken and if we felt flush some cheap dips from the supermarket. When she makes them they have to be done with old el paso packet spices, sour cream, peppers, and branded salsa. She says that to make her own sauces would cost a lot more than packets, because of the amount of cream needed.