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Advice...and hubby is being a stick in the mud!

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  • Fire_Fox
    Fire_Fox Posts: 26,026 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture 10,000 Posts Name Dropper Combo Breaker
    edited 19 July 2009 at 2:11AM
    Bluecandy do you have children? If not two bedrooms is plenty of space, unless you have a lot of clutter! No point in removing stuff you don't need, eBay whatever isn't nailed down/ you don't use regularly and you'll have paid off the debts in a couple of months. Then you can afford to move or save for your own place. Don't take on extra debt for the sake of a couple of months as bills will be higher - you are less well insulated in a house than a flat, more easily burgled so insurance higher, and you'll want new furniture ....
    Declutterbug-in-progress.⭐️⭐️⭐️ ⭐️⭐️
  • kunekune
    kunekune Posts: 1,909 Forumite
    What extra debt? If they can move cheap, get the deposit back, and live sensibly in the other house, this will cost less not more. Actually, I think there is much to be said for being happy in your rental, if you know you have to be there for a while. If children do come along, then you won't feel under pressure. And Fire Fox, that's daft: there's no reason why the house is going to be less well insulated, more easily burgled and that new furniture is needed! Those factors can be taken into account when choosing it.
    Mortgage started on 22.5.09 : £129,600
    Overpayments to date: £3000
    June grocery challenge: 400/600
  • Willsnarf1983
    Willsnarf1983 Posts: 1,928 Forumite
    kunekune wrote: »
    What extra debt? If they can move cheap, get the deposit back, and live sensibly in the other house, this will cost less not more. Actually, I think there is much to be said for being happy in your rental, if you know you have to be there for a while. If children do come along, then you won't feel under pressure. And Fire Fox, that's daft: there's no reason why the house is going to be less well insulated, more easily burgled and that new furniture is needed! Those factors can be taken into account when choosing it.


    depends whether the new house has white goods, if not then thats extra debt, then there is the cost of the removal firm, more than likely not going to get all of their deposit back and have to outlay for another one, reconnection fees of internet, sky etc

    So there are initial outlays which effectively will be debt.

    Will
    SShhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
  • lynzpower
    lynzpower Posts: 25,311 Forumite
    10,000 Posts Combo Breaker
    depends whether the new house has white goods, if not then thats extra debt, then there is the cost of the removal firm, more than likely not going to get all of their deposit back and have to outlay for another one, reconnection fees of internet, sky etc

    So there are initial outlays which effectively will be debt.

    Will

    Not really. They might have thier white goods or get them off freecycle ( like we did with our fridge freezer, thats perfectly good)

    Why wouldnt they get all of thier deposit back? How do you know this??

    they might not have sky. They might not even have BT.

    You sound very negativeWill!!
    :beer: Well aint funny how its the little things in life that mean the most? Not where you live, the car you drive or the price tag on your clothes.
    Theres no dollar sign on piece of mind
    This Ive come to know...
    So if you agree have a drink with me, raise your glasses for a toast :beer:
  • Castleman
    Castleman Posts: 365 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture Combo Breaker
    I'd have thought the issues to get sorted are (in order)

    1) why he's making you cry
    2) why you're crying
    3) your debts (combined - not quite sure why a husband and wife would not see money/debts as shared)
    4) you housing situation.
  • kunekune
    kunekune Posts: 1,909 Forumite
    Good point Castleman. This may be why OP thinks she's crying, but there may be more to it. I hadn't picked up on the separate debts, but that doesn't sound happy.
    Mortgage started on 22.5.09 : £129,600
    Overpayments to date: £3000
    June grocery challenge: 400/600
  • Willsnarf1983
    Willsnarf1983 Posts: 1,928 Forumite
    lynzpower wrote: »
    Not really. They might have thier white goods or get them off freecycle ( like we did with our fridge freezer, thats perfectly good)

    Why wouldnt they get all of thier deposit back? How do you know this??

    they might not have sky. They might not even have BT.

    You sound very negativeWill!!


    I'm not being negative, just realistic :)

    Will
    SShhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
  • partickz
    partickz Posts: 121 Forumite
    1. Can you negotiate cheaper rent with your current Landlord? Use the examples you have found as evidence that you are paying too much and be clear that you WILL move to secure better value for money. (in terms of Sq. Footage and location)

    2. Why is your boyfriend so reluctant? I think you need to discuss this clearly and calmly- is it just the hassle? (moving, DIY) Or an issue of commitment?

    3. Get the debt sorted (DFW board helped me greatly), have an Ebay clearout and start saving for a deposit! A clear-out might help you fall back in love with the flat and generate some extra ££ to kill the debt. Then set yourself a nice savings target.
    Debt Free thanks to MSE!!!! £15,000 debt became £0 thanks to some hard work and all you lovely people!
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