Advice...and hubby is being a stick in the mud!

Fire_Fox

Bluecandy do you have children? If not two bedrooms is plenty of space, unless you have a lot of clutter! No point in removing stuff you don't need, eBay whatever isn't nailed down/ you don't use regularly and you'll have paid off the debts in a couple of months. Then you can afford to move or save for your own place. Don't take on extra debt for the sake of a couple of months as bills will be higher - you are less well insulated in a house than a flat, more easily burgled so insurance higher, and you'll want new furniture ....

kunekune

What extra debt? If they can move cheap, get the deposit back, and live sensibly in the other house, this will cost less not more. Actually, I think there is much to be said for being happy in your rental, if you know you have to be there for a while. If children do come along, then you won't feel under pressure. And Fire Fox, that's daft: there's no reason why the house is going to be less well insulated, more easily burgled and that new furniture is needed! Those factors can be taken into account when choosing it.

Willsnarf1983

kunekune wrote: »

What extra debt? If they can move cheap, get the deposit back, and live sensibly in the other house, this will cost less not more. Actually, I think there is much to be said for being happy in your rental, if you know you have to be there for a while. If children do come along, then you won't feel under pressure. And Fire Fox, that's daft: there's no reason why the house is going to be less well insulated, more easily burgled and that new furniture is needed! Those factors can be taken into account when choosing it.

depends whether the new house has white goods, if not then thats extra debt, then there is the cost of the removal firm, more than likely not going to get all of their deposit back and have to outlay for another one, reconnection fees of internet, sky etc

So there are initial outlays which effectively will be debt.

Will

lynzpower

Willsnarf1983 wrote: »

depends whether the new house has white goods, if not then thats extra debt, then there is the cost of the removal firm, more than likely not going to get all of their deposit back and have to outlay for another one, reconnection fees of internet, sky etc

So there are initial outlays which effectively will be debt.

Will

Not really. They might have thier white goods or get them off freecycle ( like we did with our fridge freezer, thats perfectly good)

Why wouldnt they get all of thier deposit back? How do you know this??

they might not have sky. They might not even have BT.

You sound very negativeWill!!

Castleman

I'd have thought the issues to get sorted are (in order)

1) why he's making you cry
2) why you're crying
3) your debts (combined - not quite sure why a husband and wife would not see money/debts as shared)
4) you housing situation.

kunekune

Good point Castleman. This may be why OP thinks she's crying, but there may be more to it. I hadn't picked up on the separate debts, but that doesn't sound happy.

Willsnarf1983

lynzpower wrote: »

Not really. They might have thier white goods or get them off freecycle ( like we did with our fridge freezer, thats perfectly good)

Why wouldnt they get all of thier deposit back? How do you know this??

they might not have sky. They might not even have BT.

You sound very negativeWill!!

I'm not being negative, just realistic

Will

partickz

1. Can you negotiate cheaper rent with your current Landlord? Use the examples you have found as evidence that you are paying too much and be clear that you WILL move to secure better value for money. (in terms of Sq. Footage and location)

2. Why is your boyfriend so reluctant? I think you need to discuss this clearly and calmly- is it just the hassle? (moving, DIY) Or an issue of commitment?

3. Get the debt sorted (DFW board helped me greatly), have an Ebay clearout and start saving for a deposit! A clear-out might help you fall back in love with the flat and generate some extra ££ to kill the debt. Then set yourself a nice savings target.