The giving up/cutting down alcohol support thread! Part 4

115K

:wave: to any new people.

yellowmonkey wrote: »

It is difficult but try not to worry about your Ex's lifestyle now. I split with my OH 9 years ago and live in a council house and am bankrupt. My Ex lives in a massive house with new car and 2 holidays per year. It used to really eat me up but, thinking about it, how they live their life does not impact how I live mine so I made a pact to live MY life to the best of my capabilities and to give my family everything that I have to give them

I didn't know that about you YM. :grouphug:

winebox wrote: »

now I know the french for t0sser!

:rotfl:

I got a B grade for my French GCSE. I have no idea how that happened.

40somethingmum wrote: »

That made me laugh . We have a slow lady works in our local coop from 6am to 9am . She picks up every item in your basket, stares at it intently , then has to make a comment about each one... " ran out of milk then" " Oh do you like them.. mm I don't " . Thank god she does not work there at "wine o'clock " .. can just imagine " ooh finished that last bottle already

That would drive me mad, I'm such a typical Londoner, I'm so impatient.:o:p

It is interesting what people were saying about comparing themselves to others. I dread running into any mates from university as I was quite academic but my career has been nothing to write home about. I imagine lots of them are successful. I don't want kids ever so I don't feel envious towards people that have kids (in fact quite the opposite!:D)

I was wanting to be AF today but I'm feeling quite low today so I will have to see how I feel later. I know drinking will probably make me feel more low before anyone says that.;)

winebox

jo1972 wrote: »

(to cut a long story short :rolleyes:).

Jo, you can't! :D

115K wrote: »

I was wanting to be AF today but I'm feeling quite low today so I will have to see how I feel later. I know drinking will probably make me feel more low before anyone says that.;)

Exactly where I am at the mo.

Good news: have got home without buying any vino
Bad news: feeling very feak & weeble; shop only 1/2 mile away

Gonna go out into garden now & take it out on some trees that have got too big for their boots (well, for the garden ) - I'll soon cut 'em down to size. No idea what I'm doing btw, never done it before! Too late for advice I'm off! (poor trees)

jo1972

winebox wrote: »

Jo, you can't! :D

winebox wrote: »

Too late for advice I'm off! (poor trees)

FAY!!! QUICK!!!

Marylin

Can I join in please

Ive read the forst 20 pages of this thread and have recognised some real signs in myself...I want to read the rest but have to 'pretend' to be getting on with some work.

Anyway, quick question mainly I guess to those of you without children - what do you do to distract yourselves in the evening without alcohol? Obviously I'm a bit cash strapped which is how I found MSE in the first place so anything expensive isn't really an option. I haven't had a cigarette in 2.5 weeks so am struggling with that and am also desperatly trying to lose weight so anything 'foody' is out too.

I wont bore you all with my backgroung but I'm 36, come from a large family many of whom are either struggling with drink related issues or have openly admitted that they are alcoholics and dealing with their problems. I have noticed far too often that one glass is never enough and I have to finish everything until I fall asleep. Am also noticing that I can't remember loads of conversations / events from the night before and this is worrying me now. I haven't had a drink since Monday (I know thats not long but it feels like forever to me) and Im worried about tonight as its 'Friday' and generally the night that Flatmate and I crack open a couple of bottles of wine. She is trying to cut down too so we are both struggling but its in the evenings when its really awful we are like a couple of bored cats hissing and snarling at each other cause we cant have a drink and we cant think of anything else to do. Im almost dreading getting home.

I didn't drink for 10 months last year as I was on a huge diet (lost half my body weight) so i know I can go without but since I've started again its really got a hold of me and I dont know what to do. I cant admit to anyone how I feel as both parents were alcoholics and I really should know better.....

Im sorry for such a huge rambling first post by the way but I'm scared and need distraction techniques and help

Different_Corner

Hi Marylin
Just wanted to welcome you and MrsJC.

When I go AF I can't get my head out of a book. That it isn't everyone's cup of tea though.

Think a lot of addictions are mental so this month I've started at the top of the mountain instead of trying to climb one .

Dog needs walking..sigh.

jo1972

Hi Marylin,

Welcome :wave: and good luck, reading has been my new hobby too

Go read the other 180 pages, that'll keep you busy

xx

changing_ways

Welcome Marylin and MrsJC. This is a good place to be (except when they do pictures of eyes or feet, but we won't go there).

Finding other things to do: some people on here go to AA meetings - see cazzasmazza's posts about these. Others are doing lots of reading, housework (find this very hard to understand:eek:), catching up on DVD watching backlog, running, cycling, computer games, catching up with non drinking friends. I have just signed up for some evening classes which will take me past the trigger period of early evening.

So impressed by the 10 month AF and the weightloss Marylin. It shows you have the strength of purpose to be successful in your AF quest. Sounds like it would be good if you could get out of the house in the evenings for a bit though.

samandsheryl

Hi Marilyn and MrsJC

Marilyn - Have you thought about jogging / going on long walks? It's free and can keep you occupied for as long as you wish as well as the obvious health benefits! Joining a gym or going swimming may also work out more cost effective than staying home and drinking in the evenings.

Sam

Pippilongstocking

jo1972 wrote: »

Hi Marylin,

Welcome :wave: and good luck, reading has been my new hobby too

Go read the other 180 pages, that'll keep you busy

xx

Me too - difficult to read if p***D and not as enjoyable - I hate reading if I have been drinking.

Therefore a good AF distraction

Waves to all having shed my suit and killer heals and makeup and posh chigon (presntation went OK I think, also did a radio interview ARHGHGHGH)

I am now in the lab in grotty clothes, lab coat and gloves counting barely from one of hte other trials to help out - BLISS I am a dirty, messy girl again :rotfl:

mrsdee

Marylin wrote: »

Can I join in please

Dear Marilyn - welcome! I have just joined too and I recognise the same in much of what you have written (plus I am also "working" at my desk at the moment!). This is a great place to find support and strength - although given your great achievements already you are well on the way, it seems.
I dont have kids nor much money to spare but can highly recommend the following low-cost distractions :
- housework (sorry!) - makes you feel righteous though!
- growing stuff - if you are in a flat without a garden try herbs etc in pots (also helpful if you are looking to eat healthily and save money)
- trying out healthy recipes from scratch
- join the library and read lots! try language tapes to learn a new language (practice with flatmate!), or get some DIY/craft books
- sell any old things - including those clothes that no longer fit you - on ebay.
- catch up with old friends/contacts (pref non-smoking/drinking - maybe those with kids?) for coffee/tea/walks in the park
- do some voluntary work
- take up an evening class
- jog/walk outside - once you get going it is great and something you can do with your flatmate - get an easy programme off the web to gradually get you started
- paint/decorate/do homecraft things to make a nice environment in your flat
- watch a lot of films!
- as Sam says, maybe joining a gym or some kind of exercise class would be cheaper than drinking (also exercising makes you a bit averse to smoking/drinking)
- offer to babysit for friends who have children - you can get to do some fun things with them and steer clear of the booze/fags
- keep a running total of all the money you are saving and weight you are losing and plan something lovely with some of that extra money
- have a home pampering/beauty evening - do your nails, toenails, hair treatments, face packs (cant really drink or smoke with one of those on!), experiment with make up, body scrubs, etc etc etc.

just a few thoughts. Good luck - most of all think of how you want to feel tomorrow.
Good luck and welcome!