Would you allow a 14 year old to go camping overnight with friends of same age

sidefx

Jamie10 wrote: »

I'll add a sixth formers view to it.

Personally if I was an adult I wouldn't allow it to be at the field. During my lessons when I was around the age of 14 or so people in my classes used to organize camping in field trips and this often involved the ideas of 'stupid pranks' or a 'substantial' amount of booze. I never went to any of these as it wasn't my scene but I received so many invitations to them that I lost count.

Camping in the back garden is a whole different story though, they've still got their 'camping experience' but your mind can be at rest knowing he's fine and you can check up on him through the window any time you want.

If I were you I'd say you'll make a 'compromise' where as you'll let him and his friends go camping as long as it's in your garden and you'll promise to leave them alone for the night and not bother them.

I'm just wondering why he's so against the idea of camping in the garden? To me it's ringing 'alarm bells' that there's something quite not right about this idea, whether it be more 17/18 year olds going as or something.

As I say this is just my opinion, everyone thinks differently so I'm sure there's going to be many people who disagree/agree with me. Go with whatever your heart tells you to do .

Jamie

A very thoughtful post :T

At what age would you say a group of boys camping alone would be OK?

Once they are over 16 you can't stop them but it would still be a worry, more so even?

Saying that, I first went camping with friends when I was 13. We survived

advent1122

I let my son go camping when he was 14, no problem.
Mrs Advent did phone him every 8 minutes though, and made me check on him 36 times.
He camped several times during the summer holidays at that age with his friends.
Let him have a childhood, which includes putting a tent up in a muddy field with his mates, without all the horror stories of a !!!!! behind every tree.

PasturesNew

Gardens aren't safe either (from 1995): http://www.independent.co.uk/news/girls-family-ripped-apart-by-murder-1594445.html

Spendless

PasturesNew wrote: »

Gardens aren't safe either (from 1995): http://www.independent.co.uk/news/girls-family-ripped-apart-by-murder-1594445.html

I remember that case. They convicted someone of her murder. He was walking/cycling past their house and heard them talking about sleeping outside o/night. I think they must have been end house with a high wall/fence so he wasn't seen.

Jamie10

sidefx wrote: »

A very thoughtful post :T

At what age would you say a group of boys camping alone would be OK?

Once they are over 16 you can't stop them but it would still be a worry, more so even?

Aww thankyou

Really I think it depends on the indivudual parent.

I mean it's kind of like the argument about whether kids should be aloud to play games or watch movies that have an older certificate then their age. For example games like 'Wrestling' on the Xbox have a cerficiate of 15. Some parents would think "Well Wrestling is aimed at kids younger then that, so I can't really see a problem" while other parents will think 'no' full stop.

This 'camping' situation is the same really as we can see from reading this thread. Some parents believe that not allowing the kid to go camping would be 'over protective' while other parents think of the risks/dangers that are associated with camping.

I think the idea of 16 year olds going camping is fine. It's the end of their compulsery education and they may see this as a way to celebrate, so you could use this as a trial to see how the camping goes. As long as you give some clear ground rules and they stick to them I can't see the harm in letting them go camping every so often.

You see at the age of 14 I can see it going bad. 14 year olds are really right in the centre of the transition from a teenager to a young adult, with this being the case they often find 'reckless things' extremely funny. For example burning random objects with a cigerette lighter even if they don't smoke.

I mean don't get me wrong of course not all 14 year olds are like this, but it only takes some 'idiots' turning up to the tent along with some booze for it to be a nightmare.

Now for my answer to the OP (Don't worry I'll try to keep it short :rotfl:)

That sounds like a great compromise you've managed to come to with your son. The problem is though has he told his friends about this change of plan? They might be really 'stubbon' and refuse to move locations. If you haven't already done so I'd get in touch with his friends parents tommorow preferebly when their at school so they can't listen to your conversation (I know I used to listen to my parents talking on the phone! :rotfl:)

Just tell the parents you've heard about the camping trip and just want to confirm where it is they're actually staying and if they've gained permission. That way you'll be rest assured they're not going to 'illegaly' be staying on the farmers land.

It'd also be good if you saw the friends sister in the street. You could easily drop in a sentance such as "I bet you'll miss hanging out with your friends that weekend" If she said something like "Yeah thats why I'm going to ask some to come" Then you know it will probably be best not to let your son go.

Appologies for the long post everyone!

Jamie

creased-leach

Yes! DH was off night fishing/camping from the age of about 12. Our eldest daughter has arranged her own "fests" on the beach from the age of around 16- the last one was a 3 night jobbie (she's 19 now)

I would never have been allowed to- and feel I'd have benefited from having the independance.

We wrap our kids in far too many layers of cotton wool these days- when do they get to be kids?

Let them see that you & the other olds have arranged a couple of "random drive by's" if you're worried, that should reign in any ungainly behaviour.

Oh, and make sure they watch The Blair Witch project and Dog Soldiers in the days leading up to it.....

sharkie

creased-leach wrote: »

Oh, and make sure they watch The Blair Witch project and Dog Soldiers in the days leading up to it.....

I'd recommend 'The Hills Have Eyes'

C'mon, scary stories are traditional!

chinagirl

I let my son go camping with 3 friends of the same age, 1 of which was a girl. Think they were 15 at the time. They camped in a field hidden in trees by a stream, so noone could see them. They all enjoyed the freedom, think they enjoyed just sitting round, chatting and laughing together, and putting their tents up. Me and DH took a walk there after a few hours, just to check on them and the were fine. However, it was too cold for them at night, and they couldn't sleep, got scared by the sounds of the night, and were back in my back garden by 6am. No harm done though.;)
I say let them try it.:rolleyes:

freeoffers

This is very easy. It depends on how much you trust your son and the ppl he is with. If it was my son and he was 14 I'm guessing I would say no initially because I'm overprotective. However, I know in my heart we have to let go gradually, give them their freedom. I think my son would appreciate the trust I had in him too.

dieselhead

Mmm really really interesting how attitudes have changed even over the last 10-15 years. When I was a guide 15 years ago along with the organised camps, we were encouraged to go on patrol camps. These camps would have been 7 girls aged 11-15 camping together alone, never far from help but never the less probably without mobiles and out of view. Also when on camp we be allowed to go off and explore, sometimes in even smaller groups of 2-3. I am taking a group of guides away in a couple of weeks and these days they will never be out of our sight I actually think it a bit of a shame.

Anyway back to the question, yes I would let them go but I would probably check on them every few hours, fortunately I am a night owl and wouldn't have a problem with checking even in the early hours. However were it to be a success I would be inclined to let them do it again with little or no supervision.