Should I get more credit when I promised hubby I wouldn't?

Pigeongirl

Hi guys! I am really struggling at the moment with a bit of a moral dilemma.

I had a loan which I took out 3 years ago, of which the final payment would have been next month. However, last Oct I decided I would be clever and use my overdraft to pay the remaining balance off (approx £780) and would pay off the overdraft instead. The theory was that I would be paying lower interest and if we had an emergency of some kind, I could just 'miss' a payment without repercussions. However, I am stupid and of course didn't pay the overdraft off at all and, in fact, ran it up to its limit of £1150.

I got in such a state over it all that I confessed all to my lovely husband and explained to him that I didn't think I would ever get the overdraft paid off because I just don't have the willpower. Unless I know a payment has to go out because there will be repercussions if it's unpaid I just don't bother. I spend it. I really fooled myself because I was convinced I would pay that overdraft off. :mad:

My husband took out a £2000 loan with AA with APR of 15.9% for 24 months so I could pay off my £1150 overdraft plus another one of £600 and the rest we split.

I feel so effing stupid that I could have had this debt paid off by next month but now we have another £2000 loan hanging over us for 2 years. My husband is really lovely about it but I feel so guilty.

I really have a problem though because the bank are offering me an overdraft of £275 and I am itching to take it. I know it would be really stupid and my husband would blow his top but I keep thinking of all the lovely things I could buy my little boy.

God I am just so depressed with all this, what is wrong with me?!!!

Sorry to pour all my woes upon you, guys, but it is Monday morning after all!

Any comments appreciated (although please don't just tell me what a stupid cow I am because I already know that).

mr218

you need to get away from temptation. maybe you should start by trying to raise some money. why not ebay off some of the stuff you got.

maybe it would be best for your kid if you can put some money away in a savings account rather than buying a treat now.

you are already halfway there and you realise the error of your ways. your husband was very supportive towards you . you dont want to let him down.

maybe you need to do some revulsion therapy when it comes to spending money. can you divert yourself with a cheaper hobby like say walking or going to the library, knitting or playing with your kids in the park instead of shopping.

keep your credit cards locked away. make a budget for weekly grocery shopping and scrupulously adhere to it.

you must make a well detailed budget and a plan based on say 6 months or even a year where you must plan on repaying your loan.

with a strict budget you will have targets and milestones to achieve and that will keep your mind focussed.

linniestorm

Don't do it!!!!!

Be strong!!! I know its hard (believe me, I know it's hard!!) to resist, but think what its going to be like when that money is all spent and you've then got another £275 hanging over your head! :eek: not good!

:money: I always picture martin telling me 'NO! Bad lindsay!' when I think about doing that.

Couldn't you get some cheap art supplies and do some simple craft or art stuff with your son? there's bound to be something he could do whatever his age. He'll love getting mucky and making something 'himself' so he feels treated. You get to spend some quality time with him and it can be cheap as chips if you get the supplies from The Works or the supermarket or from around the house or something. That way everyone wins and you don't spend anything else!!!

lynzpower

PIgeongirl, you remind me a bit of me, still havent got out of the spend spend spend mindset. This is something which is a fact, and is getting me through every single day. PLenty of people all over the world wouldnt be able to conceptualise all the belongings that we have. they live fuilfilled lives nonetheless.

Dont get into more debt behind OHs back, not only will you inevitably feel guilty about the debt, you'll also undermine his trust too. Not a fab combination. It sounds to me you need to prove you can do this- and you can. But temptation is there to test us, and the weak succumb as the church say- its about the only bit of religeon I agree with lol.

BE STRONG. And yeah, sell some stuff & buy your son what he NEEDS not what you WANT-

Lots of love, I know you can do this
Lynz
xx

Ronankfan

Don't do it - be strong

nabowla

The bank isn't offering you money to spend on your son. It's actually offering to take away money from your son in the form of the interest that you'll have to pay for the overdraft. I'm sure you could think of better things to do with your money than to spend it on interest!

ceegee

Don't you dare!! Does your son actually need more "stuff"? I'll bet he's got plenty already!

If you go ahead with this overdraft it will possibly:

a) make you miserable
b) make your husband mad
c) even have an effect on your son if you are miserable and your husband is mad

You will feel much better if you can resist this temptation....honest....you'll feel really proud and pleased with yourself. Resist it and come back here and let us know how good you feel. :money:

rchddap1

I agree....don't do it. Once you start spending it can be very hard to stop (its an addiction). However, once you get hooked on this site and start to save you'll soon realise that it is far from 'free money'.

All your little boy really needs is your love and your time. Continually buying new things doesn't show them how much you love them, but instead teaches them that they 'need' new stuff all the time and how good it is to spend lots of money.

THE_LONE_RANGER_4

get rid of temptation change your bank account to a basic account let husband have the bank account with the extras as long as he can control himself ...as some one who has been there and on way out say no to overdrafts no to credit cards save for it you will allways be in credit and stay in full control

Chortle_2

Don't take the OD!

As nabowla says, the bank will actually be taking money off of you that you could be spending on your son - not giving you it!

Why don't you set up a savings account in your sons name, and everytime that you feel the 'need' to buy him something, transfer a small amount of money into it - £1 say. You wouldn't miss the money quite so much, and once it had built up to a decent amount (with all the lovely interest that the bank WOULD be giving you to spend on your son!) you could take him out and let him choose something that he would really like as a treat?

halloweenqueen_2

The bank knows you are a good bet for an overdraft, they make money out of you every time, prove them wrong pigeongirl!!!!!!!! is that £275 really worth it, especially when it goes up even more?
Why pay them back more money each month?
My DD was delighted with a pigsback stress pig - silly little things like that that don't cost anything - if you have a whsmiths near you, theres a coupon in the sun for a free ice age easter egg.