Will father get every weekend visitation?

Fuzquia

Thanks for the advice a8amg, I am going to print this off and get her to read these postings. Hopefully that will give her a much needed confidence boost!

I have no idea what advice he is getting, but he has went through 5 different lawyers before settling on this last one. Don't know if this last lawyer thinks he has a case or is just doing what he demands, I have no idea! Knowing his personality though it is prob the latter.

Thanks to all for advice and keep your fingers crossed!

pretzelnut

Will he definatley take her to court or it is an empty threat, it happens quite a lot. Tell your friend not to give in to his pressure, stick to whats happening every other weekend and if he does take her to court to continue to carry on as normal. She's not being unreasonable - he is.

He's just trying to get some control over her and if she gives in that will give him free reign to keep making these kind of demands.

The child has a settled regular routine, dad is only thinking about himself and not what is best for the child.

xmaslolly76

Fuzquia he sounds like nothing more than a big bully and until someone stands upto him and doesnt back down he will continue to bully your friend. The very fact he has gotten through 5 solicitors says an awfull lot. Tell your friend to keep her head stay reasonable and the judge will see that there is no way he will get every weekend.

Goodluck to her :-)

itzmee

The courts are more interested in the child's welfare and what is in their best interests. Mum and dad should both be able to spend a weekend with their child.

I have had experience of this as my ex took me to court for custody of our son. He was also a very domineering man. In court I was reasonable whilst he was not. I asked for him to have fortnightly visits whereas he wanted full control and for me to have no access at all - he even told the judges he would run away with our son if necessary! I got custody and he got parental rights and access every fortnight as I was happy with this.

I really don't think your friend has anything to worry about but she should stand up to him.

Wardy

My partner had his kids every Sat & Sun whilst his ex was at work - he got up at 7am to go to the house and had them until 3ish when she returned. He was very happy with the arrangement as he got to see them every weekend and a couple of nights during the week. She then decided that she wanted every other weekend and although he disputed it, he didn't have a leg to stand on.

It went to court and the judge agreed every other weekend was fair with visitation rights in the week. It's now in writing and if she doesn't drop the kids off when she's supposed to or he doesn't return them on time, the police can get involved. Granted, they probably wouldn't for a couple of times, but if it is logged with the police, its a record of not sticking to the agreement. Might be worth your friend going to court for this reason alone.

I too have a friend who has just split up with a military man, and he is very controlling, so I can imagine what your friend is going through and I sympathise. I'm not saying all military ppl are like that but they're used to being in control and some of them don't like it when they can't be.

One other question, if your friends ex is still in active service - how will he stick to every other weekend if he's called away?

ElusiveLucy

Your friend sounds like she is being very reasonable to me, whilst her ex- is being unreasonable. I am sure if she stays calm in court and sticks to her guns that the ex- will get wound up and show what he's really like in front of the judge. I'm no expert on family law, but asking for every weekend does seem unreasonable. Her offer of every other weekend and mid-week sounds pretty generous to me. I wish her all the luck in the world with the case and hope it all goes her way.

minimoneysaver

My goodness, you could be talking about my situation! My ex is a Merchant Navy Captain. He also thinks that if he says jump, you shouldn't stop to ask how high, but rather start jumping right away. I'm lucky in that he is away for about 3months at a time, but then there is the flip side where he is back with 3 months to twiddle his thumbs when he's not on courses etc. I sought advice and was told that basically there is no way on earth that any court would allow him to have my daughter every weekend for 3 months straight and then nothing for 3 months. Far too disruptive. My ex has threatened alsorts, but never followed through, although there is time! Doesn't help that he works for an offshore company and could make maintenance very difficult..... time will tell what he decides to do. Hopefully your friend can be strong and stand up to her ex.