Funerals - rights you may not know

teresaevans_2

FUNERAL CONSUMER – RIGHTS OF THE BEREAVED

For those who have had the sad experience of making funeral arrangements, I would hope that for many there is satisfaction, but I would ask you to consider that there are also many people that have had a bad funeral experience.
I am a normal member of the public who has experienced the loss of five immediate family members, the last and recent being my youngest son Boyd. All were lost suddenly with no expectations of their death.
Boyd died in tragic circumstance in 2006. The series of events that followed not only shocked me then, but have affected my life since.
This has resulted in my campaigning to convince core officials & policy makers, that knowledge about rights of the bereaved that relate to caring for the deceased and subsequent funeral arrangements, are not being delivered in their entirety, leaving many without full knowledge of their private options or consumer rights when making arrangements for a funeral.
I aim to convince the relevant bodies that knowledge about what to do after a death in England & Wales is as valuable as the education of other domestic related issues.

I have been reliably informed that my bad funeral experience is not an isolated incident and that many people have suffered because of the ‘assumptions’ that are made by officials that assume every one is aware of their rights, and understands their options before making decisions when someone dies.
This is further acknowledged in the Charter for the Bereaved which identifies 33 rights and is promoted by the Institute of Cemetery and Crematorium Management.

WHAT THE AUTHORITIES DO NOT MAKE OBVIOUS ……………..

Could I please ask that you peruse the following statement to familiarise yourself with knowledge of the industry, coupled with some of your private and consumer rights.

• Whether the deceased has died from natural or unnatural cause, you have every legal right to care for the deceased at home
• Even if the deceased has had to undergo an autopsy
• If an autopsy/post-mortem is required, ask the Coroner if there is an alternative scanning (MRI) facility available to determine cause of death as I have been given to understand that this maybe possible in some circumstance, and in some districts of the UK
• You may collect the deceased independently from a mortuary/hospital in your own suitable vehicle and casket if this is your desire
• If a coroner is involved, you may collect the deceased after the body is released
• If the deceased has died at home and no Coroner is involved, you are not required in law to have the deceased removed from home and sent to a funeral parlour
• The deceased personal property becomes the property of the next of kin, unless a Will states otherwise. This extends beyond items considered being of monetary value i.e. Jewellery etc. so if an authority refuse to return items of the deceased, challenge it
• Be aware that you do not have to be environmentally friendly as in the ‘green’ term suggests, or be removed from God as that of a Humanist to make alternative arrangements independent of a funeral undertaker
• Some consider that there is more dignity and propriety in caring for the deceased themselves
• To my knowledge there is no official guide published that address’s knowledge about last offices (home care) for victims of death of unnatural cause. I consider that this is an extremely good guide: GOOGLE the Good Funeral Guide and peruse the guide for 'undertaken with love' as in meeting with Martins terms, I am unable to provide a direct link
• If you are responsible for the funeral, meet the criteria and qualify to apply for a funeral payment from the social fund, you may request that payment be made direct to yourself if conducting your own arrangements
• Under Common Law, it is a criminal offence to commit an indignity upon the dead, or prevent a decent burial
• There is no lawful requirement to use undertakers. The certificate for burial ‘green’ form, or application for cremation is for whoever is responsible for the funeral
• When using a commercial funeral provider, your statutory rights are the same as when purchasing other goods and services. You have statutory protection with the new Consumer Regulations 2008, Sale of Goods Act 1979, the Supply of Goods and Services Act 1982 and Trade Descriptions Act 1968. What the new Consumer Regulation 2008 does, is place the onus on the trader to prove that they haven’t caused the complainant additional distress, as for decades, it has been the other way around. Should you consider that you have been brought additional distress by your appointed undertaker, seek advice from a solicitor specialising in Personal Injury
• There is no current licensing requirement to practice and set up ‘shop’ in the funeral industry (anyone can)
• There is no independent official body overseeing the practice of the funeral industry
• The funeral trade operates by voluntary codes of practice and principles, and ‘police’ themselves
• There is no compulsory obligation for a funeral undertaker to be a member of any known funeral association.
• The National Association of Funeral Directors has withdrawn their application to meet with the Office of Fair Trading Consumer Codes Approval Scheme
• It is advisable to request a contract of requirements from your appointed funeral undertaker. If there is a reluctance to provide you with one, prepare your own and ensure that you are specific to your requirements, and ask the undertaker to sign it
• You should be given a copy of the companies business terms and conditions at the outset of the arrangements
• Note that even if the undertaker is a member of a Trade Association (as they are not forcd to be), company terms and conditions may vary

Long have members of the funeral trade constrained, manipulated, advised and taken control of the consumer. In some cases their moral behaviour has been questionable. It could be argued that long have government officials prepared literature to advise the bereaved, based on advice of members of the funeral trade. I believe that this practice has encouraged the public’s misconceptions about their rights after a death to continue.

Should you have been unaware of your rights, or had a bad funeral experience, I would be interested to hear from you. Please spread the ‘word’ amongst family, friends and colleagues, so that they too will be aware of their own rights in the event that they maybe misfortunate to have the need to arrange a funeral.

Sadly, we are all potential victims of bereavement, and effectively become funeral consumers.
I will continue to campaign for the Rights of the Bereaved until the changes I feel are warranted, have been realised.

hollydays

Thanks for this very informative piece,I am sure it will help many others,over time,and sorry for your sad loss of your family members.x

sommer

Thanks for the article. Very useful to everyone at some point in time. Sorry to hear of the loss of your family. x

scoopster123

In times like this we all look for guidance and who better than the local funeral parlour, but i am sure like all aspects there are the good and the bad but at least you would expect that there was some Form of Criteria or Laws they had to follow or Abide too to a certain degree.

A family friend told me an interesting story. When her sister gave birth to a still born child they decided to bury her next to her father. Her mother and father had a 2 plot grave and they enquired about making it a 3 or 4 plot but was told it wasnt nessesary. Anyhow they burried the still born with her father, but could not register the death as it was a still born child or something like that. in years to come when the mother died the grave diggers found an un registered or documented body/cofin and then refused to bury the mother with the father. So in short the Father is one side of the Cem and the Mother the other! She put it down to unfortunate circumstances, i on the other hand would say other wise!

teresaevans_2

Yes I agree, and I hope that there are more good than bad funeral undertakers out there.
I am unclear about whom told your friend about the burial plot, but if it was the cemetery and crematorium management they could have quite possibly found themselves tied up in litigation had it been me that they misinformed. I would not have been so lenient.

Savvy_Sue

teresaevans wrote: »

To my knowledge there is no official guide published that address’s knowledge about last offices (home care) for victims of death of unnatural cause. I consider that this is an extremely good guide: GOOGLE 'undertaken with love' as in meeting with Martins terms, I am unable to provide a link

Be aware that google gives as its first link an American site, which I am sure is useful but may not always be in line with the situation in the UK. If you look for UK sites only, you get some funeral directors of that name, but at least one UK blog, linked to The Good Funeral Guide which is a work in progress.

pulliptears

scoopster123 wrote: »

In times like this we all look for guidance and who better than the local funeral parlour, but i am sure like all aspects there are the good and the bad but at least you would expect that there was some Form of Criteria or Laws they had to follow or Abide too to a certain degree.

A family friend told me an interesting story. When her sister gave birth to a still born child they decided to bury her next to her father. Her mother and father had a 2 plot grave and they enquired about making it a 3 or 4 plot but was told it wasnt nessesary. Anyhow they burried the still born with her father, but could not register the death as it was a still born child or something like that. in years to come when the mother died the grave diggers found an un registered or documented body/cofin and then refused to bury the mother with the father. So in short the Father is one side of the Cem and the Mother the other! She put it down to unfortunate circumstances, i on the other hand would say other wise!

Its sad, but that is how they did things years ago My mum had a baby girl in the 60's that died at birth, she was taken away and buried in an unmarked grave in a separate part of the cemetery. It was common at the time, in some cases stillborns went into graves with other people too, there was little importance attached to it back then.

My Mum always wondered where she went and was upset over it but didn't realise it was possible to find out. I did some investigations over a few months and managed to track down the plot where she was buried. Luckily my Uncle worked as a gardener in the same cemetery and was able to show me exactly where that plot number was.

Finding her has bought Mum great comfort. She now has a little pot on the grass with flowers and more importantly her name.

If you are in this situation you can contact your local council, preferably with a date of birth and surname for the baby. They may be able to help.

teresaevans_2

I too recently assisted someone in finding the grave of her baby buried 38 years ago. The reasons for her not knowing are complicated, however all is needed is to know the cemetery where the baby was buried and contact the local authority for that district. My friend gained the information she required in two days.
For anyone searching this thread, and wish to make more enquiries, a good place to start is with the Institute of Cemetery and Crematorium management in London. Their details can be found online.

racheloliver

Your piece held a real resonance after a recent bad experience. If anyone knows how I can contact teresa evans please let me know would dearly like to share it and help in whatever way I can with the campaigning.

cabbage

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CHR15

More info on Theresa's story here:

http://www.americanchronicle.com/articles/view/91426