Thinking of fostering

Js_Other_Half

In our area a contact officer or social worker picks up child/ren, takes them to contact, and returns them.

oystercatcher

richardw wrote: »

What is the worst a foster child can do to disrupt the family?

A friend of mine was fostering a 6 year old relative. This all came to an abrupt end when she found him sexually abusing her 6 year old ! Who knows what this poor foster child had witnessed, he didn't know any better but it's not what you want for your own children.

I am very interested in fostering but not until my own children have left home.

maz1964

hiya all

we are considering this at the moment and see what the support and training we shall get and take it from there

i totally do understand that the kids will have some kind of issue of some kind, but i believe all children deserve a lot of understanding, care and love

all i can say for the time being im trusting my gut and going with the flow and see where it takes us

i appreciate all the comments and have subscribed to this thread

have a good weekend maz

Phantom_Flan_Flinger

maz1964 wrote: »

hiya all

we are considering this at the moment and see what the support and training we shall get and take it from there

As you'll have read earlier, it seems that different Local Authorities have wide and varying ways of doing things.

jo1967

My sister is a foster carer & choses to foster children under 2 (fits in with her 3 kids). As I & my parents babysit we had to have a CRB (?) check which isnt a problem - well I have nothing to hide lol!
Yes you get attached & it is heartbreaking when they move on - especially as her foster kids are babies & think we are their family - but you do recover. Unfortuantly she has always had a replacement fairly quickly so you can focus there - sad to think so many little ones need care.

Fostering a child myself would not be my choice but my sis & BIL enjoy it, I enjoy being a part of it & without family support I think they would find it difficult so you do need to know you have a good support system.

Good luck.

libbyc3

excellent post by glamazon and anyone considering fostering while they have their own kids at home should take note!
having said that - we foster and have our own 4 at home.
We have learnt the hard way - or our kids have - the potential impact on them and it really is a constant juggling act.
your own kids have to come first, and they have to know they come first.
It is hard, but we make sure we have a holiday without the foster child - explaining to them that they get special time with their parents when they have contact, our kids need special time too.
yes we do get 'punished' by a deterioration in their behaviour before and after we go but the arrangement is explained to them from day one.
My 2 youngest aged 5 and 7 do not remember life before fostering - it is just something that our family do, its the 2 oldest - now 15 and 18 who have been most affected. We have dealt with it by being honest and open and they know they can come to us with any issue with the fostered kids. at times they have just needed to talk out their frustration other times we have involved social workers.
if any of the kids said thats it we can't do this anymore we would stop, but despite the difficulties they acknowledge the good times outway the bad.