Trying to get back in front

D&DD

*zippy* wrote:

Dotty my DH had no idea of the debt I had got us into, after the initial shock and anger, I showed him I was determined to sort it out and it was huge relief no more hiding bills, getting up really early on his day off incase he got to the postman before me etc. I still control the finances, but I make sure he sees everything. Its too much to do this alone they are his debts too.

Zippy

I have to second this as all our CC's are in hubbys name :eek: and he didn't know either it does help to let them know honestly Dotty.I've gotta run now but will check in later see how things are going

dottyanne

D&DD wrote:

Aw Dotty you're not an idiot and you're certainly not alone!! It's not a thing that'll happen overnight but you have taken the best step by admitting theres a problem and asking for help :grouphug:

Thanks (again!) D&DD, i admit i need help sorting my finances - have buried my head in the sand long enough and now its come to bite me on the behind!!

Wish i could wave a magic wand - just enough to put me in front and then i know i would be ok!

xx

dottyanne

silvermachine wrote:

One thing I noticed on your other thread was your electricity bill. I understand how you ended up in arrears, but I thought that utility companies had to allow you to pay off arrears over the same time they had built up.

I'd get on to them an simply say you can't pay off the arrears that quickly, it might free up £60 a month or so for something higher priority. They should be happy as long as you are paying something off the arrears every month

They initially wanted to install a pre-payment meter but i opted to pay in chinks instead - im gonna ring them later to see if they can extend the period i can make the payments over to see if that can minimise the payments instead.

Thanks for your advice

dottyanne

skintchick wrote:

OK - you must ring the mortgage company today and tell them you are having problems. Explain that you are trying to get to grips with your finances, and from this month will bemaking them a priority, but would they allow you to pay what you have now, and then a bit more next week (give them a figure based on what you're getting in).

can you borrow from anywhere/one? OD, friend, family?

You don;t have time to sell anything so you must call them and tell them the situation. Impress on them that you know this can't continue and that you won;t do it again but you simply don;t have it all right now.

Then tell us what they said.

We're rooting for you. You can do this. It's best to speak to them.

(((hugs)))

Hi - i think ive got about £350 now - need another £425, not impossible but im gonna see how i go by the end of thursday - beg steal and borrow and if i have to admit defeat and ring them i will - i am so determined not to let this happen again - i really dont wanna be late with this payment - i love my home and would hate to loose it

Thanks for your much needed support. :A

dottyanne

*zippy* wrote:

Morning Dotty

As D&DD said think about selling on ebay its boring, but you can quickly earn money. It kept us going last summer, we managed to clear most of our overdraft and were able to meet payments on time etc.

Dotty have you thought about Payplan or CCCS. There have been alot of threads where people have felt alot better after contacting them. You could just see what they have to say.

I think you need to be very clear on your outgoings it very difficult to understand your SOA and I wonder if you have written everthing down. Get everything on paper, do a budget and then you will feel more in control and organised.

As Skintchick said mortgage and council tax are your priority DD's. Are you already on a discounted deal? Years ago when our bank didn't send our mortgage DD out the building society let us make a part payment and they then put the remainder on the end of the mortgage. Contact them see if there is anything they can do to help.

Have you told your OH how stressed you are yet?

You mentioned on another thread that you had been to your doctor was he helpful? if not go back and see a different one.

Zippy x

Hi Zippy

This afternoon/evening im getting my head stuck in the books/paperwork and will write on here everything i owe including outstanding payments etc so you can all help me to work out this mess!!

OH knows im stressed but he doesnt have a clue as to the extent and how much debt were in - i mean he has a rough idea - but he doesnt seem to bother the same as its my 'department' - lucky me!

Doctor prescribed anti-depressants - but i feel that the answer is to talk to you lot who are in the same boat - how many skint doctors do you know (lol)?

a great big THANK YOU for your advice

dottyanne

*zippy* wrote:

Dotty my DH had no idea of the debt I had got us into, after the initial shock and anger, I showed him I was determined to sort it out and it was huge relief no more hiding bills, getting up really early on his day off incase he got to the postman before me etc. I still control the finances, but I make sure he sees everything. Its too much to do this alone they are his debts too.

Zippy

Hi Zippy

Think my OH knows about the debt - but not the missed payments etc.. he knows how much we owe on loan cc etc but not the extent of how much its killing me to meet the payments at the moment??

Dont really know what to do - hes not much of a talker - especially about things like this.

Thanks for your support

dottyanne

D&DD wrote:

I have to second this as all our CC's are in hubbys name :eek: and he didn't know either it does help to let them know honestly Dotty.I've gotta run now but will check in later see how things are going

Hi D&DD

not everything is is OH name, just unfortunatley the things im behind in - well its actually two of his CC that are worrying me to death as well as Mortgage etc. Council Tax up to date at the mo - main problems, Mortgage, 2 x CC (very behind - dreading phone or post) BT bill...............

Speak soon???

Thanks your my :A

Dotty x

ms_london

Hi Dottyanne.

Well done on posting - that takes a lot of courage!!

Please please please dont ignore your creditors - call them today. Although the initial thought is scary you will feel SO much better once you have spoken with them & agreed a repayment plan!!

Its horrible hiding from phonecalls & letters, but they need to be confronted. At least then you will know exactly where you stand and can tackle it head on.

Best of luck.

xx

livinginhope

Hi Dotty,what are your debts?are they loans and credit cards?if so you have to pay all the other bills before these,if you can't make the payments on your debts,you should talk to payplan or national debtline,they really can help and its amazing how much better you will feel when someone else takes your debts and sorts them for you.

dottyanne

ms_london wrote:

Hi Dottyanne.

Well done on posting - that takes a lot of courage!!

Please please please dont ignore your creditors - call them today. Although the initial thought is scary you will feel SO much better once you have spoken with them & agreed a repayment plan!!

Its horrible hiding from phonecalls & letters, but they need to be confronted. At least then you will know exactly where you stand and can tackle it head on.

Best of luck.

xx

Thank you SOOOO much, i am going to go through all my debts and try to sort out payments arrangements TODAY. what do i do about OH CC payments that are late though - presumably they wont talk to me and i dont really want to tell him??