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I Have Spent All My Adult Life In Debt...
D&DD
Posts: 4,405 Forumite
and to be quite honest I'm sick of it..
I have noone to blame but myself I have never been able to manage money,OH wouldn't even know how to write a cheque so he's no help but I really need to change.
We bought a little flat in '88 and struggled along with the mortgage rates going sky high for 8 years til we had DS2.I was very ill and had to pack in work..being the main wage earner this is where our problems with CC's began..
We lost our flat when DS2 was 2 months old and spent the next year in temp accomodation,I managed to sort our debts out and when we were rehoused I thought we were sorted..I got a job working from home and our troubles began..again
Hubby 'needed' a new car,then a pc..etc soon the debts piled up and my 'pinmoney' disappeared again.
We moved four times in a year due to council stocks being changed over to where we are now..We consolidated our debts (YES I KNOW :rotfl: )
I went back out to work by then we had DS3 and the strain on me was beginning to show..working fulltime to pay the debts and coping with 3 boys (4 if you include OH the biggest kid..)Ds3 was showing early signs of problems and I ended up having a nervous breakdown..cue more CC spending..
I hit rock bottom last year when not only DS3 was finally diagnosed with autism (amongst other things) but DS2 was diagnosed with severe spinal probs..I realised I now COULDN'T work my way out of debt..
Fortunately we are now able to claim help with the boys BUT can you imagine the guilt I feel having to use some of their money on our debts??
The cards are now cut up,and my vow is NEVER,EVER to get in this position again.I am 40 this year and STILL in debt with nothing to show for it...
I suppose I write this for one to give you all a little of my tale..(ok a lot then) but also as a warning to others overspending is not something you suddenly grow out of..a cautionary tale I suppose of what can happen.
I'm still married to the old git and he still drives me mad with his 'I want attitude' but now for the first time in my life I feel in control enough to say
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!
I have noone to blame but myself I have never been able to manage money,OH wouldn't even know how to write a cheque so he's no help but I really need to change.
We bought a little flat in '88 and struggled along with the mortgage rates going sky high for 8 years til we had DS2.I was very ill and had to pack in work..being the main wage earner this is where our problems with CC's began..
We lost our flat when DS2 was 2 months old and spent the next year in temp accomodation,I managed to sort our debts out and when we were rehoused I thought we were sorted..I got a job working from home and our troubles began..again
Hubby 'needed' a new car,then a pc..etc soon the debts piled up and my 'pinmoney' disappeared again.
We moved four times in a year due to council stocks being changed over to where we are now..We consolidated our debts (YES I KNOW :rotfl: )
I went back out to work by then we had DS3 and the strain on me was beginning to show..working fulltime to pay the debts and coping with 3 boys (4 if you include OH the biggest kid..)Ds3 was showing early signs of problems and I ended up having a nervous breakdown..cue more CC spending..
I hit rock bottom last year when not only DS3 was finally diagnosed with autism (amongst other things) but DS2 was diagnosed with severe spinal probs..I realised I now COULDN'T work my way out of debt..
Fortunately we are now able to claim help with the boys BUT can you imagine the guilt I feel having to use some of their money on our debts??
The cards are now cut up,and my vow is NEVER,EVER to get in this position again.I am 40 this year and STILL in debt with nothing to show for it...
I suppose I write this for one to give you all a little of my tale..(ok a lot then) but also as a warning to others overspending is not something you suddenly grow out of..a cautionary tale I suppose of what can happen.
I'm still married to the old git and he still drives me mad with his 'I want attitude' but now for the first time in my life I feel in control enough to say
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!
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Comments
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Well if it makes you feel any better I too have been in debt all my adult life but I do have nice car mats to show for it!
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us too...
ss havent you returned those car mats yet!!!! :rotfl::beer: :j OFFICIAL DFW NERD NO 159 PROUD TO BE DEALING WITH OUR DEBTS:beer: :j
If you do a job well, people won't be sure you've done anything at all :rolleyes:
Must claim back bank charges!!!:rolleyes:0 -
Been in debt from the age of 18, god thats scary0
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Think of it this way......
You are dealing with your problems now, and taking the right steps to sort out your debts. Better to be 40 and taking steps to be debt free, than burying head in sand and getting to 60, and wishing you had done something!!!!
(That's not to say if anyone is 60 and having their lightbub moment, there is anything wrong with it........... )
HUGS
LWhat's he building in there???
Debt at highest £30,450 (Dec 05)
Debt at lowest £9, 113 (Jul 07)
How much did we over spend whilst on maternity leave :mad:0 -
:rotfl: :Tsouthernscouser wrote:Well if it makes you feel any better I too have been in debt all my adult life but I do have nice car mats to show for it!
See thats why I come on here you lot always know how to make me smile 0 -
don't worry D&DD - you're definitely not the only one
I worked for HSBC when I turned 18, and I swear they sent me a credit card as a birthday present... cos I sure as hell didn't apply for one, and it arrived 2 days after my 18th! I'd not long moved out from my parents, so it seemed like great timing... I've cleared it and been debt free once or twice in the intervening years, but I've never mastered the reason I've ended up in debt again and again before - until now that is
The main thing is that you understand what is wrong with being in debt, and don't go back to living on credit - if we manage that, I for one think that dragging myself out of debt will be worth all the agony, as it will have taught me one hell of a valuable lesson!!Highest Debt (Sept 04) -> £41,300
Debt Free - August 2006!!
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I think we should have a poll on what southernscouser should do with his car mats. A house isn't a home without a cat.
Those are my principles. If you don't like them, I have others.
I have writer's block - I can't begin to tell you about it.
You told me again you preferred handsome men but for me you would make an exception.
It's a recession when your neighbour loses his job; it's a depression when you lose yours.0 -
I'm 26 (not sure if I'm still counted as young hee hee) and I've been in debt almost consistently since 18. My first MBNA credit card was signed up for at a service station as they were giving a free cuddly bunny to anyone that filled in an application form. When I think about that now I'm amazed that a cuddly toy started my debt and the worse thing is I don't even know what happened to it!!!Quit smoking 18/08/070
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Well, I've just turned 30 and have been in debt since I was 19 and started university. Ironically, the vast majority of my debt was built up after I left from about the age of 25 upwards. I've just started to tackle it and plan to be debt free (apart from mortgage or course!) within 5 years, although realistically I think it'll be more like 7.
Once you acknowledge the problem it can only get better!0 -
Thanks for sharing D&DD. Sounds like you've had your share of tough times so far. Wish you all the best and hope we reach our debt free dates sooner than we think! Leason learnt :beer:0
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