Grandparent is a dangerous driver - what to do?

monkey_writer

My grandfather is 88 and in the last few years he has become very forgetful and a bit confused. He'll go upstairs to the toilet and come back half an hour later having not found it. We'll talk to him and five minutes later he's forgotten what we talked about.

Yet he still drives. Not much, but he does.

He's very stubborn and won't think of parting with the car.

About a year ago we became particularly concerned when we were getting a lift and on the motorway he missed his turn so he stopped and reversed up the 'in' slipway............... whoa!

But it seems like there's nothing we can do to protect him (and other road users).

Is there a mechanism for reporting and testing and taking away licences for old people when they are no longer safe drivers?

boogiemaster

You could see his doctor and recommend he write to the DVLA on the grounds he isn’t a safe driver anymore.
Or just get in touch with the DVLA yourself; best thing is to see his doctor as he has the power to take his licence away from him.
Get him stopped before he injures himself or someone else.

boogiemaster

His doctor could recommend he sit a re-test to see if his driving is still up to standard, if he doesn’t pass that then I’m afraid his driving days will be over.
Just go and see his doctor and voice your concerns!

Nile

Hello monkey writer


I understand what you mean. My father in law is in his eighties and was driving until recently. The family tried to persuade him to stop but he was equally as stubborn as your relative.

He had his first accident and blamed it on the other party........a taxi driver who drives for a living.:rolleyes:

He had his second accident and admitted that it was his fault.

It was only after his third accident, when the police were called.........that he was persuaded (by a very stern man in a uniform;) ) to give up his license before he either killed himself or some other road user.

Will you wait until your Granddad has an accident, or will you get the family together first and decide what action to take?

I know that it's a very difficult situation. Your Granddad wants his independance but you must think of the risk to other road users too.

Best Wishes

Nile

Chris_VRS

boogiemaster wrote:

His doctor could recommend he sit a re-test to see if his driving is still up to standard, if he doesn’t pass that then I’m afraid his driving days will be over.
Just go and see his doctor and voice your concerns!

I agree!..I'll restrain myself from typing what I think about 'older' drivers! :lipsrseal

scheming_gypsy

i don't agree. if he can't remember that he went upstairs to the loo or what you told him 5 minutes ago do you really expect him to remember that he's no longer allowed to drive?

monkey_writer

well yeah! haha! We'll have to take the car away... except then he'll forget and then he'll call the police and tell them someone's stolen his car!

Poppycat

I have a step father who has had problems like this. Walks out of his flat in the middle of the night, often slept in his garge as he got locked out, drove down the wrong way on a very busy road, involved in a accidnet where a motor cyclist was involved, I think he was partly to blame, although I dont know the ins and outs just what I got told. His daughter from another marriage burst his car tryres so he couldnt drive. Eventually after six montsh car got towed away.

Perhaps doing something similar if you can.

burbs_2

You need to contact DVLA as someone has already said. At the end of the day he is a danger to himself and others. If he is too stubborn to realise that then he needs to be forced to realise that.

Reversing up a slip road should be the icing on the cake for you. If you let it continue and he has a serious accident you will be gutted. Get on the phone to the DVLA and explain the situation.

scheming_gypsy

it isn't about being stubborn though if he's forgetful. Like i said in my previous post if he's forgetting things how is he supposed to remember hes not allowed to drive. By contacting the DVLA all that's going to happen is he'll have his license revoked, he'll forget and still drive, he'll cause an accident, he won't be insured, OP will be even more gutted.

Speak to the police and have them put on record that the car hasn't been stolen.. Although if he's getting that forgetful how does he know which is his car?


Edited : just re-read and it's Niles relative who was too stubborn not the OP's.

monkey_writer

he keeps the car in a drive behind a gate... so it won't get towed!

great advice - thanks all, I'll speak to my mother and see if we can contact the DVLA...