seen the light but need help

lynzpower

Ellie
Just to say about ebay- you would be very surprised what people will buy on there.
I thought i had nothing worth selling, but then made 250 in 2 weeks.
It kept the wolf from my door temporarily!

kathfisch

Ellie, you've made the first (and hardest) step in just posting here and asking for help so give yourself credit for that :T

Its understandable that you feel very worried about all of this now, its confusing and all a bit much at the beginning. Don't worry about not knowing things or seeming silly, we really aren't gonna judge you (or for your typing either!!). Just take your time to sort through things in your head and keep chatting here, you can keep the thread going as a kind of diary of progress. People are always available to answer your questions or just offer support. Stick with us, we're all doing it together!!

Really do consider talking to your husband, the support and joint effort of someone close to you is so valuable.

Best of luck,

Kath

ellieshopaholic

rchddap;that is just how i feel , they are my problems and should not ask my oh to help.
he would like to move away nearer civilsation , i would love to as well and then pay off all debts as quite alot of equity in the house and start a business ie a tea shop or cafe as i am always complimented on my cooking etc. have actually stopped having folk over as it was ME footing the bill for the three course dinner being ruthless now i have woken up and concentrate on feeding my own family from now on and not the credit card, and getting out of debt.luckily my husband does not have any cards, sensible man!!

rchddap1

The thing is ellie...you are married to the man. He is your partner. This means that your problems are his also. Although my OH and I aren't married just yet that is how I feel about our relationship.

By working together you stand a better chance of moving house, and of getting that business. The support you can get from a partner can do the world of good...particularly to your confidence and sense of determination to get rid of the debts for good.

If you can't ask for help from the person that you love the most....the person that you have decided to SHARE (emphasis on the share) your life with then what is the point?

Perhaps I'm a bit soppy, but that is my take on my relationship with my OH.

Murtle

there is a great thread on how to feed your family for £12 per week. it can and is done so that would fit into your £154 per month. That is left from your spend, I don't know your husbands as things like the sports stuff isn't broken out so isn't as easy to see. One way of calculating all expenditure is to go through the last three months statements and write it all down. You'll see how much is being spent on kids stuff then. Don't apologise for things, it's so easy to get where you are now! And there are many people who are in similar situations, just waiting for that lightbulb moment!!

x x

ellieshopaholic

husband has just phoned to say that older son has got a weekly paper round to swap for his sunday round so husband is going to do the sunday round and make £28 a month, not much bu tit all helps and if we can build on the cosmetic round too then we will have a wee bit extra for living expenses and not to spend in on non essentials , you have all brought us luck!!! it is a start do not mind working hard , i once had five part time jobs wheni was married before as he did nto give me ANY money at all. but only had a two children then not four to feed

rchddap1

What good news. Believe me there will be bumps down the road, but if you all pull together you can sort things out for good.

stellagypsy

Ellie - good luck sorting this out - you have taken some positive steps so far. I agree with the other posters, you and hubby need to share this thing. I can never understand couples who don't pool their money / troubles, after all you married "for better or for worse" and inevitably there comes a time in all relationships when it is "worse". You have to pull together on this one.

Is the cosmetics round Avon? Stick with it, it has taken me about 6 campaigns to hit it right. I now have brochures circulating in 3 offices (council departments - lots of captive customers), have a nucleus of about 30 other customers of whom approx 2/3 buy each time and yesterday a neighbour asked for some brochures to circulate amongst her (very large!) family - I'll probably knock her 10% off to keep her buying from me. OH is now helping me with this as he now sees the potential earnings (after being very derogatory about it in the first few months). I can earn £60 easily with miinimum effort, this can double with twice the effort (and that is not much in terms of time).

HTH, Stella xx