Help with non payment from father

marksoton

Soubrette wrote: »

You may have to think carefully before going via the CSA wen1 - under CSA, your ex is under no obligation to pay the mortgage and on the variation form that I had to complete was a section for NRP to apply for a variation ie reduction of liability if school fees are paid.

It may be that he is paying you more with those benefits in kind than if he paid you 20% of net income (less if he has the children at all, or has responsibility for other children).

Also, if you decide he is paying less than you would get via CSA then he would be entitled to stop paying for the mortgage and possibly the school fees (I don't know the position on those) as the CSA hand all responsibility for spending the prescribed amount to you but in return the NRP is not liable for further costs.

Sou

I would suspect he might keep paying the mortgage but would try and force the sale.

As for the school fees then no he would not be bound to pay them.

b3nton

Yeah I don't think he will have to pay school fees.
A PI will be VERY expensive.
Good luck

AnxiousMum

marksoton wrote: »

But the father is paying the school fees and mortgage

My apologies - I ASSUMED it would be a split cost between the parents -each paying half or a percentage towards mortgage and school fees based on their incomes.

Loopy_Girl

So will you be happy when you are living in private renting/social housing or worse, a homeless unit whilst they find you social housing and the kids are going to state school?

Because that it what will happen if the CSA track him down and do an assessment and make him pay.

He will either force the sale of the property now or pay his half and you have to stump up the other half and then he will stop the school fees.

You have no mortgage to pay and should be getting the 25% discount from council tax. So the saving from not paying the mortgage should be sufficient to 'clothe and feed' your children whether you are working and getting WTC or whether you are on benefits.

Or do you, naively, think that he will pay child support AND the mortgage and child fees?!

AnxiousMum

For the OP - whose decision is it that the child/children go to an independent school? If it is a joint decision - then morally, it's only right that the cost is shared according to income, but I don't think CSA go on 'morally right'. If you do go route of CSA - then you need to ensure that you are prepared for your ex to say 'i'm paying all that I'm ordered to pay and that's it'......

wen1

The answer to your question is that i move out of the FMH and renting .Property is under offer now and just waiting for for the sale to go through.
With the children and school fees he says he want to keep the children in the same school and pay the fees. And yes this was joint decision.
Watch this space if happens............
It would be unfair to them to move school because they had hard time with the divorce and house move and there father being unreasonable towards them.
He is very high earner and what he earns in a month is someone wages for a year.
So soon he only be paying for the school fees which would a drop in the ocean as they are very reasonable rates.
I have gone to CSA and they cannot find any employment history or tax records this my problem and he will not answer their questions!!!!!

Loopy_Girl

So presumably you are going to benefit quite soon from your share of the proceeds of the sale of the house - maybe use this wisely so you don't ever feel again that you can't clothe or feed your children.

Do you work? Only reason asking is that if youdo not, you would only be entitled to keep the first £20 of anything he pays.

By the sounds of it the CSA are the least of his problems and he is up to his neck in tax evasion.

Only your conscience can decide whether to report him to HMRC.

wen1

The way he has been towards me and the children it on the top of my list to report him, there a many ways to skin a DOG. And I will just buy my time.

Loopy_Girl

Well you have answered your own question then. Something to think about however is that there are many PWC on this board who get absolutely nothing from their NRP. No mortgage paid and certainly no education at a fee paying school.

A large proportion also choose to completely cut their children out of their life which, going by your other posts, doesn't seemed to have happened.

Don't let your hell for leather attitude on wreaking revenge on him for whatever reason take your mind off the main subjective which is to maintain a decent standard of living for your children (and from what you say there is going to be a downturn) and also for your ex to make a contribution to the childrens upkeep. Which, by keeping a roof over their head and still allowing them to enjoy private school, he is doing.

I have spent time on benefits and also am a working single mother and I have never came out with a comment saying I couldn't afford to feed and clothe my children. Make sure you are getting all your entitlements and perhaps you need to look at your outgoings to see where changes can be made. You have clearly been able to enjoy a very reasonable standard of living and this will not be able to be maintained unless you are of the same profession as him of course and 'earn in a month what most people earn in a year'.

wen1

Loopy Girl there is more to this story than you think it's not revenge .
I have been near to being homeless and chase by debt collectors, threaten with violence, house breakings,
stalking and my ex has lost me my job, which I loved and its very hard to get back into the industry.
I'm Lucky that I have close friends and family to help me out.
I dont live in the FHM because I had some many problems with my Ex.
All I want is to move on and be left alone and live a normal life without this person trying to drag me and the children down into the gutter.
The last few years it has been hard for all of us, life is hard enough and with someone trying to find many ways to bully or manipulate you all the time, it comes a point that you have to fight back which I have by the Law court.
And this has been costly to me to keep him way.