Apparently not entitled to anything?

stokegal

anniehanlon wrote: »

dont you dare feel bad, we are here to help you and 99% of people have apart from the oddball who has no useful thing to say.

Keep posting if you need support and ignore the no hopers.

Damm!! I was say the same thing but you beat me to it - with my lengthly response (why use 1 word when you can use 5 - eh!!):rotfl:

ThomasK31ly

Cornball wrote: »

To be honest, if you can't afford to have this baby maybe you should look at adoption? I'm not meaning to sound harsh but it sounds like this baby was unplanned and there is no stigma at giving your child a better life and lots of adoptions let you stay in touch with the child.

Then you and your partner could wait 5 - 10 yrs, progress career-wise, save, etc until you are capable of supporting a family.

Re-read the OP and tell the board how adoption even enters in to the equation for this family... and then consider how many other family's may be in the same predicament.

shelovestobuystuff

A one bedroomed place may be worth considering if its much cheaper.I had my daughter in our room for the first few months anyway and I suppose many mums do,just have a screen between the cot and bed.
Re the dog,could you apply for help with the surgery costs from the PDSA?

shelovestobuystuff

you have to get onto the waiting list for council accomodation as its usually much cheaper than private rented.In my area its less than half that of private rent.

The wages amount (£1000 a month)and the benefits you were told you would get using the online calculator with child benefit too is over £1400 a month so if you find accomodation thats reasonably affordable you will manage even in a private rented place.Sure start grant covers all baby stuff so no need to worry and may even get some housing benefit.

Good luck and I hope you find somewhere nice.

seven-day-weekend

Can I just say that the adoption option is not about 'not being good enough'?

It's about having the wherewithall to support your child and considering whether your child could have a better life elsewhere.

Therefore it is ONE option for the OP. It is a selfless option actually.

I speak as someone who is adopted and who had a wonderful life with adoptive parents (my much-loved Mum and Dad).

BREX

Hi Chazsucks

You will manage with your baby ....as a mum of 2(21 and18)..my husband and I have been through some hard times...but we have managed and I would never say to anyone about putting off having a child. Many people say they put off having children until they "can afford too"...if this was the case many children would not be here. You will cope and even if it is a struggle the pros of having a child outweigh the cons,
Some people just have a negative outlook!

Have you tried your local housing association? The may be able to help you.

skintas_2

good luck with the baby, you should defintley be entietled to tax credits when your baby is born, and your a couple. it seems couples who want to be together get it harder than single mums who claim benefit.... seems really unfair i know, when you are a single mum and then you claim, everyone thinks your a sponger....

i know ive been in both situatuions,you would think the benefits system/goverment would give more support to mums with partners who arent working or claiming..

Good luck with the baby, when i had my first i was with my oh went it alone at first. my partner couldnt handle my post nantal depression.. i was on maternity pay... eventually he moved in..

good luck with the baby x x

shelovestobuystuff

What about this or something like it for accomodation?Its just under 12 miles from the centre of Putney so not far.Maybe not what you drean of but all bills are included in this rental price too.
http://www.rightmove.co.uk/property-to-rent/property-14311024.html?locationIdentifier=REGION%5E1105&sortByPriceDescending=false&pageNumber=1&backToListURL=%2Fproperty-to-rent%2Ffind%2FCroydon%2FPurley.html%3FlocationIdentifier%3DREGION%255E1105%26sortByPriceDescending%3Dfalse
I used google maps and searched rents in areas within your commute distance and see that the further south east you go,i.e roughly in the direction of purley,the cheaper the rents get and the nicer places you can find for less money.Remember to check local transport links as if theres a high spead train connection you can look slightly further afield and stay with the 1 hour travelling time.
Happy house hunting,I am sure you will find something lovely.
this is nice
http://www.rightmove.co.uk/property-to-rent/property-17503769.html?locationIdentifier=REGION%5E1105&sortByPriceDescending=false&pageNumber=1&backToListURL=%2Fproperty-to-rent%2Ffind%2FCroydon%2FPurley.html%3FlocationIdentifier%3DREGION%255E1105%26sortByPriceDescending%3Dfalse

suki1964

fairydiamond wrote: »

My point is that your comments were hurtful when this young women was looking for advice about what she is entitled to ... it was clear from the beginning she wants to keep the baby.

Why do you find that so difficult to understand.

Having just read this thread, may I suggest that the comments were hurtful to you personally. I certainly wasnt hurt by them and the OP hasnt indicated she was either, she calmly said adoption wasnt an option.