ex is ruining my chances of selling

desperategirl

I really need some advice. Three years ago I entered a joint mortgage with my now ex. We split up 12 months ago and have had the house on sale since July. I moved out in November and since then the estate agents have been reporting back to me that there are complaints about the smell of smoke, amount of people asleep on the floor following all night parties and the general upkeep of the place. I can't afford to go on like this and feel like jumping out of the window head first. I don't know what I can do. I am going round to clean each week but he then trashes it as soon as I leave. I am being looked after by a wonderful new boyfriend at the moment but can't move on with my life until house is sold. It's teetering on negative equity a the moment.

What can I do?

poppysarah

Send him a solicitors letter telling him you will sue for the loss in house price achieved.

Or seek some legal advice fiirst
Throw him out -

Stopping paying the mortgage and getting it repo'd is the ultimate ending to this if you don't get it sorted.

mlz1413

Are you still paying into the house?
Has your Ex said what he wants from the split?

If you can agree an amicable arrangement it will be much easier, can you speak to any of his family and try and work things out?

desperategirl

I am still paying half of the mortgage and half of all the bills apart from council tax (although I am still giving him a little extra each moth for it.

I have discussed the issue with his mother who says she is very sorry but she can't do anything about it.

I have an appointment with CAB for 20th - do you think there is anything they can do to help?

poppysarah

Find a solicitor who'll give you half an hour free. That could be a lot earlier than the 20th.

You're subsidising his bills? Stuff that for a game of soldiers.
I think you're being very nice to him and he's really taking the mick.
Discuss with the EA maybe the drop in value - and point this out to the soandso. AND Stop cleaning the place.

I know you want it to sell but I suspect you would be better making him leave and living there or leaving it empty until it sells.

mlz1413

totally agree with poppysarah, stop paying all money above half the mortgage and stop cleaning up after him.

no wonder he has the money to throw parties when your funding them!

your ex is obviously sore about your breakup and the fact you have moved on, but 12 months on is enough time to get his act together.

SmallEnglish

I totally feel for you. I went through this same situation about 8 years ago. I agreed to move out of the place my ex and I had bought together, and moved into rented accomodation, on the agreement that he would maintain it whilst it went on the market.

Of course he proceeded to act like a complete tit, refusing to pay anything towards to mortgage or bills, refusing to let me get the flat put on the market and living like a total tramp.

In the end I got myself a solicitor who wrote a few angry letters which kicked him into action. We sold the place, it obviously went for a lot less than it could have due to the state he left it in.

My advice is to get a solicitor. It might seem expensive but honestly, for me, it was well worth it just to get the place sold and get him out of my life.

dougk_2

Personally I would suggest if there is very little equity in the house that you see a solictor and get him to write to your ex offering the property to him for free in exchange for removing you name off the mortgage and deeds of the house.
Then its up to him what he does with the property, Otherwise by the time you pay estate agents fees etc it will probably end up costing you to get rid of the house

GDB2222

dougk wrote: »

Personally I would suggest if there is very little equity in the house that you see a solictor and get him to write to your ex offering the property to him for free in exchange for removing you name off the mortgage and deeds of the house.
Then its up to him what he does with the property, Otherwise by the time you pay estate agents fees etc it will probably end up costing you to get rid of the house

Why would the mortgagees agree to letting the OP off the hook? I'm pretty sure they won't.

IMHO, the OP needs paid-for legal advice. The ex- is obviously happy with the present arrangement and will let it go on indefinitely, so the OP needs to bring matters to a head, which will probably cost a fortune in legal fees. Bankruptcy may be a solution, actually, unpalatable as it seems.

Pee

It's always worth asking. I don't know what his income is, and obviously they are not so keen to lend as they used to be.

You do need legal advice as every month this is not sorted is costing you money.

ILW

desperategirl wrote: »

I really need some advice. Three years ago I entered a joint mortgage with my now ex. We split up 12 months ago and have had the house on sale since July. I moved out in November and since then the estate agents have been reporting back to me that there are complaints about the smell of smoke, amount of people asleep on the floor following all night parties and the general upkeep of the place. I can't afford to go on like this and feel like jumping out of the window head first. I don't know what I can do. I am going round to clean each week but he then trashes it as soon as I leave. I am being looked after by a wonderful new boyfriend at the moment but can't move on with my life until house is sold. It's teetering on negative equity a the moment.

What can I do?

Is your new bloke able to look after himself. If so send him round to sort out the situation.