Defined contract order..

Rebe

Can anyone please tell me how this works and if it guarantees contact between parent and child?

Rebe

*contact!!

Blob

Hi. They are the first official step in trying to make sure that you have contact as it has been Ordered by a Court. It would be a very unwise person that once this Order has been made decides to go against it as the Court will want answers.

My ex decided that she was not bound by such an Order and it has cost her dear! For her part she did not want me to see the children ever again after the divorce as she lost everything that she thought she would get by right, how sad never mind! She was questioned in Court by the Judge and her solicitor told to sit down. Basicly the Judge did his nut, big time and left her in tears.

The Order that he then made stated that she was to "surrender the children" to me at given times that he set, she did not dare break this Order. She was also coursioned that a 'Penal Notice' would be attached to the Order and that she would go to prison if she broke it. Surprisingly she never has, even though she hates both it and me for getting it. The kids on the other hand love it as it gets them away from their step father!

Hope it helps if you need any more I will try to help, as been there and got the T shirt!

Rebe

Thanks for your reply.

The problem is my OH has (like you) not been able to ever see his children since he and his ex wife split up, he tried everything, going through courts but his ex refused still they couldn't enforce it. Then I heard about this but wasn't sure whether it was worth a shot as its been a few years since he last saw them, but also if it's going to (once again) be a waste of money and time and cause him more upset because the outcome is still negative and his ex still refuses to let him see them, i'd rather not pursue it, for his own sake?

SuziQ

Blob you have had an entirely different experience to us. As far as the courts we dealt woth go-Medway Kent-absolutely nothing happens to a parent there who defies a DCO except a slapped wrist and visit from a cafcass officer. She tells him she 'will let them go next time' then defied that-and you wait another few months for another court hearing which costs a fortune and achieves nothing.

I have several friends who are in the same situation-one in Oxford the other in Newcastle-and their contact orders have been as useless as ours were. As our barrister said-not worth the paper they are printed on when judges will not enforce them for fear of upsetting the mum.

marksoton

SuziQ wrote: »

Blob you have had an entirely different experience to us. As far as the courts we dealt woth go-Medway Kent-absolutely nothing happens to a parent there who defies a DCO except a slapped wrist and visit from a cafcass officer. She tells him she 'will let them go next time' then defied that-and you wait another few months for another court hearing which costs a fortune and achieves nothing.

I have several friends who are in the same situation-one in Oxford the other in Newcastle-and their contact orders have been as useless as ours were. As our barrister said-not worth the paper they are printed on when judges will not enforce them for fear of upsetting the mum.

How long ago was this ? Things are slowly changing for the better.

If an order is already in place then it should be quite easy to get it back in court,not months. A penal notice should be attached if non compliance continues. If money is an issue there are other option available such as a mckenzie friend.

Blob

If it comes to a real battle you can if you have the Order with you go to the police to get them to enforce it, they dont like this but it can be done, and will work, as the police will follow the Court Order. If the ex then starts to play up you have a differnt opinion to take back to Court as the police will if she goes for them arrest her. I know it all sounds a little dramatic, but for things to change you have to get in there and fight, sorry and all but that is just he way it is.

My ex was going to take the kids out of the country and decided that she did not need to let me know or anything else. I found out by chance and told her that if she tried this she would be arrested. I had taken the Order to the Police at Gatwick her intended point of departure and shown it to them. They were on the point of getting a Seniour Officer to sign the Order but I tried again and we opend a line of comunication that worked! If it had not then Special Branch Officers as well as armed police would have borded the plane arrested her and her partner and taken the children from her. In the event that this had happened I am told that it is unlikely that the Court would have returned the children to her ever!

The question that you have to ask yourself is are you willing to fight for your kids, personally I will go through the gates of Hell and throw the devil out for mine! No offence ment but I do know of some NRPs who dont give a dam about their kids, so when they come to me for help, I find that after talking to them and looking at the CSA papers there is nothing that I can do to help them!

Rebe

Blob,

I know for a fact that my OH desperately wants to see his kids, I didn't know him when he was first seperated from them but he told me last night he tried contact centres, going to court ect. But he hadn't heard about this DCO, and neither had I until doing some research.
So basically, if he get this contact order and she refuses, my OH can get a penal notice on it which means what? that she has no choice but to let him see them? sorry for all the questions but really want to help him if I can as now he's with me he feels so much more confident.

Rebe

Mr_Green_Genes

There was a case a while ago (maybe a couple of years - I'll try to research it later to find out details) where a judge, on seeing the same case of non-compliance with a Contact Order coming before him yet again, actually reversed the Residence Order and granted full residence to the NRP. What's more, that was a male NRP.

It doesn't happen much but it could.

Mr_Green_Genes

And while I'm doing that, check these out, they may be of use in such circumstances.

http://www.familylawweek.co.uk/site.aspx?i=ed1930

http://www.hmcourts-service.gov.uk/infoabout/children/child_adopt_act.htm

Mr_Green_Genes

I've just spotted that I'm posting to myself. Hey ho!!

Whilst I'm still looking, eating my tea, drinking a glass of wine and watching an episode from the complete box set of Buffy The Vampire Slayer, try this one as well.

http://www.dpp-law.com/matters-involving-children/mother-with-shared-residence/

And no, I haven't found what I was looking for yet. Buffy may intervene but I'll get there eventually.