So, is this it? Drugs, lies and more lies....

supersavingsharon

Would you want this person as a best friend? Probably not!!!! Do not let this relationship drag you down, you deserve much better and so does your son. Can this person ever make you happy and be trusted?

jennyred

also, I imagine 'subs' are subutex which is a heroin substitute like methadone but it is in a tablet form which dissolves under the tongue - the idea being it stops people who are heavy users who might think about injecting methadone.
HTH
jenny
(ps - I am not a user - I work in substance misuse!)

sleepymy

Why are you exposing your child to this person?

RAS

Hi

You have a child and found 10 bottles of mostly empty methdone when you went snooping in suitcases?

What could have happened if you child had found the bottles?

he is not mindful of your needs or your child's. and he is emotionally abusive. Please get rid.

Mappygirl

Hi,

Just wanted to say sorry for the situation you are in. I work with drug users and they are very good liars, but they still have emotions and feelings and it's hard to walk away from someone you love. Could you live apart? If you love him too much to break up at least living apart will reduce the arguments and be a better enviroment for your son. Also if he is on methadone there is a good chance he'll be on a support programme and be tested to see if he has used. Your partner could give his permission for his support worker to discuss things with you and tell you the results of his drug tests. If you speak to your local drug support agency they may have support on offer for friends and family. Hopefully they can provide yopu with support and information.

'subs' usually refer to subutex which blocks the effects of heroin (if someone uses while taking subutex they will get no effect) Methadone tends to mimic the effects of heroin and someone can still get an effect from using heroin on top of their script.

Whatever you decide to do, don't just put up with this behavior. Put you and your son first.

HTH and good luck x

Pee

First of all, don't feel that you should have spotted this. I was with someone for many years - about seven - and the first two years when we were very close, I had no idea at all about his heroin and methodone use. When I did know about it, I never knew when he was using - with hindsight I have a better idea - and unless you lock someone in the house and watch them 24 hours a day , neither good for you or them, you won't know.

I think the general message is that you need to get out. Certainly that was the right thing for me, and hard though it was, I am glad I did it.

I think that you know that is the right answer for you from your post.

If you do feel that he is so special, and that you do want to make a go of it, you need to be really firm with him about it now, or it will carry on and it will get worse. And to be honest, it will be harder to do that than to just walk away.

You are not the only person in this situation, and you will survive, but you do need to put yourself first and make sure your needs are being met here, not that you maybe want to "save" him, which I admit was probably the logic behind what I did. (And which of course did not work....)

feelinggood_2

Hi MugHead.

I don't really have any advice to offer you, but wanted to point out a group who might help:
http://www.famanon.org.uk/

"Families Anonymous is a world wide fellowship of relatives and friends of people involved in the abuse of mind-altering substances, or with related behavioural problems."

If you get in touch with them, you'll be able to talk to people who've been where you are. Hopefully it'll help you make the right choice for you, a choice that you are certain about and can be happy about. Addiction, and loving an addict, is very complicated and complex thing, and I hope you can get some support.

x

kaya

to be blunt, he is a junkie, you can't help him im afraid, only he can do that, and his lying indicates he is not ready, get yourself and your kids away from him and there will be a happily ever after waiting for you somewhere, stay with him and you will get dragged down also, dont be fooled though, junkies are extremely clever manipulators, they have to be in order to survive.

angie_baby

I feel for you, BUT you need to decide if this is the right type of role model around your child. I do not know how old your kid is but how would you feel if your child found one of these bottles and managed to open it?

Or how would you feel when social workers decided to pay you a visit as you have a known adict with you?

Kaya has put it perfectly.

DeeDee74

aww i do feel for you hun i spent 5 years with a heroin addict so i know how u feel.
i think if he's gone to the length's of hiding it from you along with all the other Lie's and telling you your not as good as his ex , why waste your time.???
get out hun you are worth more and you have your child to think about.
dee x