Please help!!! Im racked with guilt

dprovan

Hi all

I'll explain the situation.

Ive just sale agreed my own house and next day sale agreed the house we wanted to buy. Lovely house great garden, no bigger housewise in the one Ive sold, but the garden is to die for. Great for kids, all enclosed and plenty of it to run around in. The house has bags of character and can be extended also....

Next day, from agreeing sale, an unbelievable house has come up, you know the sort you always thought you could never ever aspire to. About 100 years old, all the victorian character on the best (prestige wise) street in the town. It is huge all the sash windows etc, no real garden but a big site that you could maybe do something with.... Its the sort of house Ive always dreamed of.... And is priced in our bracket which I can't understand...its priced at offers in region of 295... my top line is about 330.. and I think there is a real possibility of it going over the 330...but the starting price surprises me (where we live house prices are still rising (another one we looked at was listed at 275 and went for 340....

So here is the guilt, Im a guy who always believes in honour you give your word you see it through.....I also believe in good and bad karma..... How could I consider pulling out of a deal.....Aggaingst when I move it will be for 30 years plus so will I doubt the decision.......... This big old house 9just on the market) will probably cost a fortune to upkeep..... Whereas a less grand house will mean Ill have few costs and will be happy.......

Isn't it just the way 1st time a house has come up in this area in years and its one day too late for me..........

Im not sure what Im looking for anyone to say, maybe it was just therapeutic to get it all out....

windym_2

Unfortunately 1 in 3 house sales falls through. For whatever reason. The most annoying and stressful bit is when people pull out at the last minute. The best thing I can say to you is that if you are going to pull out then do it sooner rather than later. Before people start having surveys etc.

If you like this other house better, then firstly you need to go and see it. When you've viewed it give yourself 24 hours or a weekend to write down all the pros and cons of the two you like. Then make your decision.

If you opt for house 2, then tell house 1 immediately. Give truthful reasons. It may be that they have not yet found their dream house. If you go for house 2 and this falls through in the future it may well be that you can go back to house 1. At least by giving the truth you are keeping your options as open as possible.

Ask yourself how you would feel if your buyers pulled out. It is a tough one, but for me, the money is on the 2nd house and my happiness in the longterm. But trying to make the whole thing as stressfree as possible.

Good luck, whatever will be will be!

NastyMatt

Nothing wrong with aranging a viewing.. you never know.. that might put you off it!

JennyW_2

I agree - have a viewing - it could make you mind up for sure. As someone said, if you need to pull out, better sooner than later.

ccaaajf

If you don't view it you'll always be thinking about it!!! Go for it.

Andy

zag2me

I always say this but nothing is set in stone until you exchange contracts.

NAR

There must be a very good/bad reason for the property going on the market so cheaply. You may well find that it requires extensive remedial work, that puts the overall price well above your budget. Go and find out - if it is as I describe then you can rest easy that you'll know you couldn't have afforded it anyway!

nmiah786

Like others have said go and view this house and assess if that really is what you expected it to be and most importantly whether it is really better then house 1.

Also like others have said nothing is set in stone until exchange of contract.

I admire your moral stance but how certain are you that your buyer or your vendor will have the same moral stance as you!!!

Like another poster said go and explain your dilema to your vendor once you have viewed house 2 and see what they say.

Also make sure you decide quick before anyone spend any money on instructing surveys!!!

Let us know what you do!!

BoL

dprovan

thank you for all the responses......

They say time is a great healer..... Im already falling back in love with house 1. Ive contacted the agent selling house 2....I explained I wanted to view but quickly given the urgency.... So far the sounds arent encouraging... the seller will only offer viewing sat/sun and that is final... I can't view this week because of work.... The estate agent has no idea what price she has in mind or what her situation is ......Ive also drove by the house about 5 times.... There is alot of condensation inside windows.....huge sash windows...Which Id want to upgrade (cost a fortune)... and partly central heated... so more money there....Whilst its on the best road in the area...its a really busy main road..so with the kids in mind this isn't ideal...whereas house 1 has a huge enclosed/private garden..

Therefore I think Ive decided house 2 is my ideal house but not the ideal house for my family and house 1 meets that requirement....

With all that in mind I am pretty sure Im happt to stick with house 1 as agreed....If something goes wrong with it then I can re-consider house 2 and whether we could compromise a far lesser garden for the house.....

Anyway thank you so much for all the advice, and should anything change Ill let you all know... thanks again.

nmiah786

These MSE bunch are excellent and always help with great impartial advise.

Good to hear we can be of help and please do let us know how things progress.

Well done!!!

Meeten

Are you sure that you haven't written off House 2 in your mind?
Not questioning you, as you appear to be a person of honour, not many people would have this moral dilema!

Perhaps you should arrange a viewing of House 2, and then you can really put your mind at rest ....