Mum's health and weaning from breast to bottle/cup

nadnad

Betty, at 1 year old he def does not need formula - he should be getting all his dietary requirements from his food. The only reason he needs milk is for calcium but there are other ways to get this into him - ie yoghurts, milk on his cereal, cheese etc, also green veg (brocoli esp ) have high amounts of calcium.

If he drinks water from a cup then he wont get thirsty.

I would try first of all to stop the day time feeds, offer him water in a cup (or milk if you want to persevere) at every opportunity give him the cup and show him what to do - my lo can hold the cup and drink himself now and doesnt like me helping.

How often is he waking in the night? my lo wakes at least twice but i know at this stage its habit and wanting comfort rather than needing milk - and that goes for your son too. I know that i shall have to be strong and tell him no and i know it will take a few nights of crying but i'm sure that will stop him waking. Can your OH go and comfort him in the night when he wakes? and see if he goes over to sleep then? if not then you could comfort him but NOT feed him and after a few nights he should get the message that there is no point in wakening if he's not getting the boob!

PurpleK8

I had the same probs trying to stop feeding son, started trying at 12 months but at 15 months i was still doing the night feeds - he wouldn't take any other milk from me or anyone else if I was in the house and if i did try to leave him he'd cry and I'd leak! in the end I arranged to go out each evening for a week, by day 3 i'd 'dried-up' and he never attempted to feed again, really easy in the end and he didn't stress himself at all.

good luck x

siren13577

jacksons_mum wrote: »

i had exactly the same problem and tried everything, what finally worked was the haberman feeder by medela, i got mine on ebay, it was like a miracle, he took it straight away after weeks of trying every type of bottle / teat out there!

The Haberman feeder is supposed to be quite similiar to Browns bottles (according to Tracey Hogg) which are around £10 for two in Boots and £4.00 for the teats you might need. Tommee Tippee bottles and teats are cheap in Home Bargains/Branded Bargains now and the teats do actually look like a nipple and are supposed to be quite close to the breast too.

I wonder if you could take your ds and buy a super dooper special bottle, a big boy bottle and make a fuss out of him and tell him how he can drink his special drink while having a lovely cuddle with mummy and a nice book? I appreciate you don't want him being too excited at bed time but sometimes feeling special might take the sting out of things.

I feel for you, it must be really difficult and I think you have done a wonderful job to persevere at breast feeding for so long, you deserve the rest, take care and HTH!

listerofsmeg_2

Have you tried the Tommy Tippee 'Closer to Nature' bottles? I found them to be quite good.

We had to teach our daughter to drink from a bottle, as she didn't know how, being breastfed (age 18 months). We did it because she was waking about 8 times every night to be breastfed and we thought if we gave her bottles she wouldn't wake up as much. It worked! She only got up twice a night on bottles.

It took quite a few nights of giving her the bottle, before she figured out what she was meant to do with it. So you do have to be persistant.

Could dad give him the bottle while you go somewhere else for a bit? Even just to another room?

Our girl doesn't like straight cows milk (I never have either so I don't force the issue!) but she'll drink half and half cows milk and formula milk. Do you think your son likes the taste of cows milk? I think formula is sweeter? It certainly smells sweeter. If he doesn't like cows milk maybe start him on formula and gradually mix it with more and more cows milk.

At 21 months, she self weaned completely off the breast, and just last week (she's now 22 months old) she slept through the night for the first time. We did that, by cutting down the amount of milk in her bottles gradually until she didn't think it was worth waking up for anymore.

Jo_R_2

He doesn't need formula, at his age he can go onto cow's milk. I started mine both at 6 months when they started weaning, with a sippy cup so got in there early to get them used to drinking from a cup/beaker. What we did at first was only put water in it so they separated it from milk (which *had* to come from me, I know how you are feeling!)

Without wishing to stray into giving medical advice, it might be worth getting a second opinion and/or researching meds yourself.

pandora205

Many breast fed babies are like this, whether their mums stop at 12 months or 3 years. It's difficult for both of you, not least as breast feeding has many advantages. If you have fed when your child is upset or sleepy it is particularly tricky as it is a comfort as well as a food.

Going 'cold turkey' is tough but works eventually. It can be helpful to take a break, go away for a day or so and have someone else give your child milk. As others have said it is fine to give cows milk from a cup (probably a feeder beaker is best at this age) though many mums use various bottles/cups with teats.

If you are doing this on your own it is very tough but can be done. You will need lots of moral and emotional support though, and you will need to live through the tears. You may need to think of a reward system for yourself - a treat if you get through 12 hours for example, as you will need a lot of determination.

(I breast fed all three of mine, each until 2+ when I was pregnant with the next, so I do know what it is like).

I also agree that CBT is better treatment for anxiety than medication - It's a shame there is such a waiting list. Try this book, which is an excellent self help guide:
http://www.waterstones.com/waterstonesweb/displayProductDetails.do?sku=5507657&WT.term=how+to+master+anxiety&WT.campaign=1256&WT.source=google&WT.medium=cpc&WT.content=603473785&cshift_ck=1213855865cs603473785&WT.srch=1

nadnad

can i just add that i see a lot of people recommending bottles - i don't think i would want to be starting my son on a bottle at an age where he should be stopping one iyswim.

and if he's anything like my son (and it does sound similar situation) it doesnt matter what its put in because its the milk the baby doesnt like and not the cup/bottle. I think you are best to persevere with the same type of cup at every opportunity and maybe like others have said - leave him for a day with someone else and see if he drinks for them. (although i tried this and my son is so stubborn he didnt take anything!)

bestpud

Is private counselling an option for you?

It can be expensive but most counsellors will consider a concession for potential clients so it may be worth contacting a few.

CBT tends to be short term too so it isn't like you shouldn't be paying for months on end.

I am surprised your GP can't place you as a priority given you are unable to accept other treatments right now. Maybe you could go back and say you are trying to stop feeding but that is causing further anxiety and a vicious circle is emerging?

Also, try contacting Mind as they often provide cheaper counselling, and if they don't, they should know who else does in your area.

If you think private counselling may be the way to go, then http://www.bacp.co.uk/ is a good place to start.

Also, if you scroll to the bottom of this page: http://www.rcpsych.ac.uk/mentalhealthinfoforall/treatments/cbt.aspx there is link to free online CBT resources.

I think Moodgym is quite good, personally, but haven't looked at the others.

daphne_descends

What medication would you be taking?

Check here http://www.breastfeedingnetwork.org.uk/drugline-information-and-factsheets.html to see whether you can in fact still breastfeed - bear in mind that whatever medication you are taking, the impact on your milk and therefore your baby will be vastly different when feeding a 1-year-old than when feeding a newborn.

Unfortunately GPs and HVs are often a bit misinformed about medication and breastfeeding.

bestpud

daphne_descends wrote: »

What medication would you be taking?

Check here http://www.breastfeedingnetwork.org.uk/drugline-information-and-factsheets.html to see whether you can in fact still breastfeed - bear in mind that whatever medication you are taking, the impact on your milk and therefore your baby will be vastly different when feeding a 1-year-old than when feeding a newborn.

Unfortunately GPs and HVs are often a bit misinformed about medication and breastfeeding.

I think it likely the OP won't want to take meds and breastfeed, no matter what her GP says tbh.

I hope this isn't crossing into medical advice but my GP would not give a definitive answer on this, because they can't basically. Neither did I find enough information to out my mind at rest.

It was all very vague I felt and 'vague' isn't easy for someone suffering from anxiety.