My Soa Not Pretty Reading!

TurnaroundSue

nirelandguy wrote: »

I thank you all for your help, But as is mentioned above until I have this LBM I won't get anywhere, and its gettting to the point where I MUST change rather than I SHOULD change which is the issue here I reckon.

So what is stopping you? I think the time has come that you take on board some of the excellent advice already given and put it into practise. People giving advice here are able to do so, as they have been where you are now, and are still there, so it is not being said without the wisdom behind the words. Really have a long hard think and ask yourself whether you do want it to get better (which will require change and change isn't easy) or carry on as you are and like hypno says be back here in 6 months' time asking exactly the same.

Be kind to yourself, you are in the right place and NOW is the time for action.

System

TurnaroundSue wrote: »

So what is stopping you? I think the time has come that you take on board some of the excellent advice already given and put it into practise. People giving advice here are able to do so, as they have been where you are now, and are still there, so it is not being said without the wisdom behind the words. Really have a long hard think and ask yourself whether you do want it to get better (which will require change and change isn't easy) or carry on as you are and like hypno says be back here in 6 months' time asking exactly the same.

Be kind to yourself, you are in the right place and NOW is the time for action.

Unfortunately I am a chronic procrastinator, Inspiration comes and goes, you never said truer words than above, Change isn't easy, But its totally up to myself:o

hypno06

nirelandguy wrote: »

Unfortunately I am a chronic procrastinator, Inspiration comes and goes, you never said truer words than above, Change isn't easy, But its totally up to myself:o

So, say NOW that you are taking control and you are going to get out of this mess. Go and get a pad of paper and a pen and start brainstorming - taking on board all the advice you have had from here. You have been around the boards for long enough to know how it works.......

Get cutting back, get onto the Old Style board to make the shopping bill go further, get mystery shopping fitting jobs in around the kids, get OH to enter competitions to see if she can win stuff you can sell, or give to people for Christmas etc.

Sign up for freebies, start a spending diary and log EVERY SINGLE PENNY....

And say to yourself "I am proud to be making these changes and teaching my kids the true value of money"...

Take control! The only thing that is stopping you is you!

Fire_Fox

nirelandguy wrote: »

Well I've had a read through all this again, The landline won't really get much cheaper, Broadband again is only £15, £30 mobile will be going, TV is £10 for BT vision. Its so bloody frustrating because no matter what I do, its not gonna make a hell of alot of difference to be honest. You might save £10 -£20 a month but what good will that do to be fair,

You are still refusing to address the car issue which is both your biggest asset and your biggest millstone. It's quite insulting for someone who is just starting out on their debt-free journey to tell those who are successfully dealing with their debts (and in some cases have paid off massive debts in full) that they are wrong when they advise you to look again at your telecoms spending. :rolleyes:

I also don't think it's very fair of you to complain to people who have major worries of their own, when you clearly have no intention of putting in some effort yourself. This is time we could be spending making a difference to someone who desperately wants and needs help. This is a very busy board and sometimes posts from newbies end up lost and unanswered because of trolls and timewasters. :mad:

Keep your lifestyle and keep your debts, or take ownership of your lifestyle and take ownership of your finances - your choice.

Fire_Fox

Hypno's post inspired me to read back through a few of nirelandguy's recent posts. All over threads about Sky even down to starting his own threads (four of them)! Within the past month he has signed up to Sky AND BT Vision, then cancelled Sky, then signed up to Sky again, then had an e-mail from Sky cancelling his order.

boredofbeingathome

Morning Firefox, just wanted to say that it is not worth you getting upset. Nirelandguy admits he is a procrastonater and everyone has given him a lot of food for thought.Sometimes it is admitting it to ourselves and letting go a bit.

It takes time to get there and yes others may need help but all the advice on here will help others as there are some useful tips. So no need to worry about it.

System

Fire_Fox wrote: »

You are still refusing to address the car issue which is both your biggest asset and your biggest millstone. It's quite insulting for someone who is just starting out on their debt-free journey to tell those who are successfully dealing with their debts (and in some cases have paid off massive debts in full) that they are wrong when they advise you to look again at your telecoms spending. :rolleyes:

I also don't think it's very fair of you to complain to people who have major worries of their own, when you clearly have no intention of putting in some effort yourself. This is time we could be spending making a difference to someone who desperately wants and needs help. This is a very busy board and sometimes posts from newbies end up lost and unanswered because of trolls and timewasters. :mad:

Keep your lifestyle and keep your debts, or take ownership of your lifestyle and take ownership of your finances - your choice.

Ok, I should tell you where to go to be fair. I will address the car, the reason we bought a new car is previously we had an old 106, before that an old Vauxhall Cavalier, they where cheap cars, the Vauxhall £500 the 106 £800, both kept bloody breaking down, and anything to do with cars is not cheap especially on our wages, so we bit the bullet and bought a newish car in the hope that would end our headache, However since December something in the front went which cost £800 to fix, at the mix something in the back is making a funny noise but don't have the money at the min to get it looked at.

As for my telecoms, the landline is on an offer with BT at the min £9.99 (usually £30) a month for free anytime calls, broadband £15 a month for unlimited, I urge anyone to try and get these cheaper, BT vision £10 a month for 12 months which is usually £17.

And as for my procrastination, if you have read my threads so much you would know I suffer from bouts of anxiety and depression

So I am sorry that I am not jumping with enthusiasm, the truth is I don't have any for anything in life, But I have started a spending diary and I have listed the mobile phone on ebay along with a couple of other things so but because I don't get all excited don't assume I am not doing anything.

TurnaroundSue

nirelandguy wrote: »

Ok, I should tell you where to go to be fair.

And as for my procrastination, if you have read my threads so much you would know I suffer from bouts of anxiety and depression

So I am sorry that I am not jumping with enthusiasm, the truth is I don't have any for anything in life, But I have started a spending diary and I have listed the mobile phone on ebay along with a couple of other things so but because I don't get all excited don't assume I am not doing anything.

If you come on here asking for help/advice then sometimes you have to expect people to be harsh and realise that this might happen - it does hurt, but sometimes it also has to be said! I don't think you telling anyone 'where to go' is the answer.

You admitted yourself that you are a procrastinator but didn't actually mention in this thread that you also suffer from anxiety and depression - I haven't read your other threads so wasn't any the wiser until you mentioned it now. Again, it does help if people are aware of all your circumstances when posting.

It is good to see that you have taken some things on board and have started a spending diary and selling on e-bay, but it also helps people who have given you advice to know that some of it has been taken on board, otherwise we get to a position like now, where we think that you are just poo-pooing anything any one says. So well done, you are making steps in the right direction, albeit small ones, but at least you are heading the right way up the right street. Keep posting, and keep us advised of what headway you are making as this really does help both for the people who are giving the advice, and you, who can see that making changes, no matter how small can have a massive impact on your overall circumstances.

System

What I'm doing now is going to get the tax credits sorted, and anything else we might be entitled to, the CAB will know on Monday, I'd also like to get something sorted that we could maybe even start saving some money, say £10 a week taken out of my pay and put in a savings account, or maybe the credit union.

I do appreciate the help, there is certainly alot of information to take into account, but I will get through it all eventually.

hypno06

I think you have two priorities - one is to get rid of the debt that is outside your dmp, and then to put just a little away for emergencies (real emergencies, not "I need a takeaway" emergencies!)

So, my way of tackling it would be to pick on of the debts - the smallest perhaps, (I would choose the catalogues) and to target it. Throw every penny you can at it. So, if you sell something on ebay, pay the resultant money off the debt straight away. Once you have paid that off, you free up £30 a month - a big amount, and you can close the catalogues and never use them again, thereby minimising the risk of increasing the deb again!

Once you have done that, then you could, say, put £10 out of that £30 saving in credit union, which would allow you to take out a loan IN A REAL EMERGENCY if you need it.......but there is little point building up big-ish savings while you are in such a pickle, so I would prioritise the debt first.

Believe me, the little things do add up - I have got my debt down from over £100,000 to £36500 in a relatively short space of time -sometimes I only pay off £2 extra, but that means that my debt has reduced by £2 not increased.

Once you get into that way of thinking, it feels very liberating....