Step parents right?

genie_2

As a step parent to 2 children, I wanted to get some advice on what parental rights I have?

I recently discovered, by accident, that I can't even sign for consent for my step child to have dental treatment! The form had to be re-signed by my husband.

Legally where do i stand with regards to my step children? If i wish to have legal parental rights, do i have to go to court to get this and what say does the non resident parent ( the children's biological mother) have in this? The children have been living with my husband and i for almost 7 years now and he has a full residence order from the court, with the biological mother allowed supervised access once a week. this is taken on a sporadic basis.

Would I need to formally adopt the children or how do i go about things?

One child will be 16 soon, so i'm not sure how that would affect them, if at all. Other child is almost 11.

I'm in Northern Ireland and I'm not sure if the law differs here in respect to all this compared to mainland UK.

thankyou in advance for any replies received!

Becles

I don't think you have any rights at the moment. When I married my husband, he wanted rights over them in case they needed medical treatment when I wasn't home, or officially the school could have said they didn't want to discuss the children with him.

We got forms from the court website called a step-parent parental responsibility agreement. We had to fill them in and take them to the court office along with birth certs for the children and proof of ID for the adults. My ex had to go as well, and the three of us had to sign the form in front of court officials.

It means the children have three people with parental responsibility for them, and my husband can give consent for medical treatment etc., now.

I'm in England so I don't know if it is different in NI.

Strapped

As a step-parent you don't have any parental rights.

As Becles says, it is possible to legally acquire them though and if all parties agree it's a relatively simple matter.

genie_2

Well it looks like I'll just have to stay as I am with no parental rights. The biological mother is so awkward that she would never agree to sign any legal document giving me any rights over the children. She doesn't care if this is in the best interests of the children or not. Anything she can do to be a pain and cause upset, she will

Thanks for replying to my query anyways
genie

Strapped

If your stepkids are subject to a residence order (stating that they should live with your OH), I think it's possible to have you added to this, even without bio-mum's consent. This would give you parental rights.

genie_2

Thanks strapped, I'll look into the possibility of that

doelani

you can get parental responability for your stepchildren through the court, my hubby did ............

children lived with us, no real contact with their dad. We seen a solicitor who applied to court for my new hubby to have parental responsability. My ex husband was informed about this and was given the opertunity to object, he never even bothered to reply to the solicitors letter, and the judge looked at all the facts, they lived with us, we were married, if anything happened to them and I was not there their stepdad would be . The judge granted my husband parental responsability ( will have to look and see exactly what form from court says may eb residence ) and it names my husband, my ex husband and myself as being responsible for them. It will not take away the absent parents rights but just gives the stepparent the right to sign forms / give permission etc. Once we got this we forwarded copies to childrens schools and doctors and dentist so they could update their records.


We were told that if my ex husband gave permission this was good , if he did not the judge would decide what was best as far as chilldren were concerned, which he did.

I think It wcost less than £200 to do this through solicitor and this was about 5 years ago.

Vomityspice

Section. 4 Children Act applications only apply to the father (not a mother!). See

http://www.opsi.gov.uk/acts/acts1989/ukpga_19890041_en_2#pt1-l1g4

Alternatively, another way to obtain PR would be a step-parent adoption (SPA). You would then gain all the rights of a biological parent. For a SPA, you would need to contact your local social services department for them to undertake an assessment to be submitted with your application. Again it is very simple, and there is no need to pay a solicitor to fill in the forms. She/he will only ask you the questions that are on it!

The SPA would entail a social worker visiting a few times to compile the report. The SW would also speak with the children to ascertain their views (if appropriate - i.e. babies can't really tell you much!).

The SW would also speak with the biological mother to a ) ask for consent, b) if consent is unreasonably refused, can recommend to the court that her views be dispensed with. (i.e. its in the best interests of the children). The 'ex' doesn't have a veto. The cost is much the same (you shouldn't be charged by the local authority for their assessment).

Hav a look et:

http://www.direct.gov.uk/en/Parents/Adoptionfosteringandchildrenincare/AdoptionAndFostering/DG_10021340

which might help.

Currently a registered Social Worker (GSCC) and in my final year as a Law Student (LLB)

skylight

We didn't bother with any of that. I just went ahead and signed everything as if I were her mother.

Her school were well aware of the situation and were happy for me to do all the admin/meetings etc. And in the off chance that she did take ill, the law covers emergency treatment anyway (I mean that you don't turn up in am ambulance and they refuse to treat you!) so that if anything did need signing, the OH would have arrived by then anyway.

Wasn't worth the legal effort.

And if anyone asked, I was truthful. I answered that I was her guardian. I am. Now, not a legal guardian, but was never asked that! It wasn't a problem in the years she lived with us. (just turned 18 now)

money_maker_3

http://www.niassembly.gov.uk/record/reports/010514b.htm

This is the link to the Northern Ireland assembly meeting in 2001. Scroll down about half way to the family law part and it says there that you can get full parental responsibility by applying to the courts if you are married to the biological father.

Hope this is of some help

doelani

just checked and it was residence order my new hubby applied for which then gave him parental responsibility.

After my ex and I split we never sorted our residency, kids just lived with me but this made it legal and gave my new hubby the legal right to sign for doctors, school etc. We did not have to involve social workers etc.


Adoption was never an option as their dad was their dad no matter what he did or did not do and would never take that away from him.