no birthday present from parents

miss*whisper

I like the "cards only" approach.

(my family ask me what I would like and then get me whatever they think I really meant when I asked for something specific - prime example being "I would like Martina Cole's book 'the business'" and then being given Michael Moore's 'Dude where's my country'... )

Susan_Frost

Maybe you are a bit more "one big happy family" type of a person than they are and people dont always live up to scratch.

Is that why you visit so often, spend so much money? Are you trying to make it something that it is not - Not that it is a bad family, just not as considerate as you would like.

I would not stop visiting, just cut it down a bit, build more of other things into your life as well as your family.

I would do a bit of a jokey "Hey, what happened to my prezzie, did you find what you were looking for" type of thing. See what the reaction is. If nothing materialises, just do a more reasonably priced card and flowers in future rather than the £150 meal, etc. etc.

You obviously feel hurt, but need to put it behind you.

LilDevil

Just thought I'd share that my mum always asks for a list for Xmas/birthdays - and then gives us money because 'she doesn't know what to get'! :rolleyes: She likes to get sensible pressies, or stuff for the house - but given both myself and my sister have homes of our own, we don't need anything like that (well, I need a new bathroom and new windows/doors, but they're far too expensive for anyone to buy us :rotfl: ).

I would just go with what everyone else has suggested and go with the 'shall we just give cards from now on'

Primrose

I guess some people just don't think that birthdays are a big deal once you're a grown-up adult and feel that remembering by sending a card is appropriate. After all, having someone remember your special day in whatever way is what really counts and most of have all our basic needs supplied already. I think the "let's all just settle for cards only" is the right approach. We've all done that in our family for years, along with a phone call on the day to say "Happy Birthday" to reinforce the message. If you have the money to treat your parents on their birthdays, that is fine, but perhaps they are now short of money. Many older people are badly affected by the credit crunch. After all, they raised you for goodness knows how many years while you were growing up, during which time they must have spent a small fortune on you. . Perhaps it's time to recall those famous old words "Now that I've become a man, it's time to put away childish things".

*Louise*

Another vote for the 'cards' route here

Maybe a box of chocs or a bunch of flowers to go with it, but I certainly wouldn't be spending £150 taking everyone out for meals.

Turtle

How do you know this us a man? I thought it was a woman tbh

LJM

to be honest im happy not to recieve gifts i too would prefer a nice card i have 2 girls and the rest of my family all have children and we tend to now just buy for the kiddies,far to expensive otherwise.we know we love each other we dont need to spend money to prove it

Stephb1986_2

No teach her a lesson dont buy her anything and don't even wish her happy birthday and see how she likes it!

I know it sounds harsh but she needs a wake up call why does she expect everyone to buy her a present for her birthday and get it on her actual birthday and make a fuss of her when she doesn't do the same for anyone else!

Steph xx

WEEGIE

:hello: I like the cards approach, there could be many reasons for no present. IMHO it is better to give than receive, in saying that I would be wondering why I didn't get a gift if that was the norm all my life. My advice is to forget this years birthday and focus on the real reason why no gift was forth coming and if it is so important to you to get a gift next year, try the hinting route. Ii.e if you are thinking of what to get me for my birthday, I really like ..... and see if that works.:D I hope this makes sense :beer: . A belated happy birthday to you.:wave: