leaving a house in a will but to only one child.when there is two

TTMCMschine

besonders1 wrote: »

Problem is if you disinherit someone, it will cause trouble between siblings or the person who get the money may feel as if they're being dishonest to their bother/sister. If I or my parents had fallen out with my family and I was left with the full inheritance then I would still share out the money equally even if a will was made against this as I think it wouldn't feel "right".

Do you think it's ok to go against somebody's wishes, even if you think they are wrong?

besonders1

What they choose to do is one thing, but what I choose to do is an entirely different matter. If they left me all the money in a will then thats their decision but then if I decide to share it out equally, then that would be my decision as its my money now.

TTMCMschine

besonders1 wrote: »

What they choose to do is one thing, but what I choose to do is an entirely different matter. If they left me all the money in a will then thats their decision but then if I decide to share it out equally, then that would be my decision as its my money now.

I do understand all that. If i had left you all my money in my will. Specifically not including certain people for whatever reasons i chose - i would be upset if you chose to then share that money out to people i had specifically missed out. I might as well not have a will. Obviously you can share the money how you want, spend it on who you want. But if you go against specific instructions, you are effectively being untrustworthy, and that person who has died doesn't get a say. There may be reasons you don't know about, i think you're assuming they're just being stubborn, but those reasons may be very valid. I wouldn't feel right going against someones wishes. When we are dead - we don't have a voice, that is why we have a will. If someone close left me out of a will, i wouldn't take money of another relative in some form of compensation - as it would be going against the person who's died wishes.

mlz1413

I'd say be grateful there is money left.

If my Mum dies with enough to bury her I will be grateful and amazed. I'm of PinkShoes school of thought i'd rather she led a full life and spent her money on herself.


Also agree children should not spend their lives hoping for a handout, I know my next of kin will be made fully aware anything I leave will be what of ran out time to spend!

seven-day-weekend

A friend of mine, who is a care assistant, was left £100,000 in one old lady's will. The lady left a similar amount to another care assistant and the district nurse. She stated her reasons in her will - 'they were the people who had looked after her and she hadn't seen any of her family'.

The family contested, but got nothing afaik.

My friend used it to pay off her mortgage.

Pee

geoffky wrote: »

Bit of a problem with a family member.The mother of two children aged in there 40s and the mother has fell out with one of the children and has had a will written to say that one of the children gets nothing upon her death...the question is i reckon the other child can contest this will and get half..is this right or can she do this? ps its on my wifes side of the family and find it very sad that it came to this but everyone is stubborn and refuses to entertain forgiveness...

They can contest/ claim against the Will. If there is a genuine falling out, it's very unlikely that they would be able to mount a successful claim and so long as a solicitor drew up the Will, it's unlikely they could successfully contest it.

People do do this. It's up to everyone what they want to put in their Will, whether this is for good reasons, because there was always a favourite, to teach someone a lesson... I don't think it's a very good way of behaving, but then I don't know the circumstances.

If my parents cut my sister out of the Will, and it is far more likely they would cut me out, I would def share it with her.

edgex

if all the benefactors agree, they could completely ignore the will
last will & testament is only that persons 'wishes' after all
once your dead your dead

localhero

Pee wrote:

If there is a genuine falling out, it's very unlikely that they would be able to mount a successful claim and so long as a solicitor drew up the Will, it's unlikely they could successfully contest it.

This made me laugh. I could wallpaper my office walls with the amount of duff Wills I've seen written by solicitors over the years! :rotfl:

TTMCMschine

Pee wrote: »

If my parents cut my sister out of the Will, and it is far more likely they would cut me out, I would def share it with her.

I wish people would stop acting so saintly. You really don't know what you're talking about. I am in this situation. I fully expect to get nothing from my parents (definately not my dad), money is money and it usually only gets wasted at the end of the day anyway. You really don't know if situations will change.

So saintly Pee. My father has nothing to do with my Grandmother, neither does my Aunt. I have had to impliment all the care. I am the one who visits her and takes her out. Neither sibling went to their fathers funeral, or visited her in hospital. They didn't see what a state she'd got herself into in her home. It is really distressing to see a relative become frail. My Grandmother once told me she was just leaving her estate to her grandchildren (i don't know why she told me - i didn't want to know - she'd changed it a few years back when she was far more independant). I have asked my dad repeatedly if he'll go visit his mother, but he refuses. She is now not in a fit state to change her will anyway, but are you saying, if i get anything - i should be giving it to my dad? Whose refusal to talk to his parents - i'd say pretty much led to my grandfathers death. (He tried to drown himself in the sea, and ended up in a pschychiatric ward. I think he died a heartbroken man. So stop being so sanctimonious - and understand - you don't know what's going to happen. Your parents might have very valid reason to cut out a sibling. I have given my dad every chance to see his mum.

Pee

TTMCMschine wrote: »

I wish people would stop acting so saintly. You really don't know what you're talking about. I am in this situation. I fully expect to get nothing from my parents (definately not my dad), money is money and it usually only gets wasted at the end of the day anyway. You really don't know if situations will change.

So saintly Pee. My father has nothing to do with my Grandmother, neither does my Aunt. I have had to impliment all the care. I am the one who visits her and takes her out. Neither sibling went to their fathers funeral, or visited her in hospital. They didn't see what a state she'd got herself into in her home. It is really distressing to see a relative become frail. My Grandmother once told me she was just leaving her estate to her grandchildren (i don't know why she told me - i didn't want to know - she'd changed it a few years back when she was far more independant). I have asked my dad repeatedly if he'll go visit his mother, but he refuses. She is now not in a fit state to change her will anyway, but are you saying, if i get anything - i should be giving it to my dad? Whose refusal to talk to his parents - i'd say pretty much led to my grandfathers death. (He tried to drown himself in the sea, and ended up in a pschychiatric ward. I think he died a heartbroken man. So stop being so sanctimonious - and understand - you don't know what's going to happen. Your parents might have very valid reason to cut out a sibling. I have given my dad every chance to see his mum.

Hey, I'm not trying to be saintly, and it doesn't sound as though if I was in your position I would share it with your Dad. I agree, everyone's family circumstances are different, but if someone is just playing with their Will to be bitter and twisted then I can rise above that.

I also know that once money gets involved, people get greedy.