depressed

Cat695

I think he was pointing out your 19k in debt but are still getting married and pretty much wasting 6k on your wedding

shelovestobuystuff

We have been together for nearly 18 years and never been able to afford it,thought that we could manage it now.Its almost all paid for now anyway so I guess we will go ahead despite the days revelations.Anyway the 6k wont be wasted we will enjoy it very much.
I am paying for the wedding myself via extra money I make on ebay etc,I have cleared my own debt and have a small income, now I obviusly have to sort out hubby2b too.Everything major that can go wrong with the house has been repaired,thats what the 19k debt has been for,so there should be no reason to use the cards again anyway.

YorkshireBoy

Is it now a case of "what's ours is ours"? (you'll have to say something like this at the ceremony...can't remember exactly because it's a long time since I said it!)

You talk of our mortgage, our house repairs, our wedding...but then you talk of his debt.

Seems like you should (if you can?) take on some of his debt, since you clearly appear to be 'benefitting' from it.


EDIT: Crossed with your post about your "low income". Could you earn more? Second job etc?

shelovestobuystuff

We do split the expenses.He covers the big important stuff and I do everything else.Our deal is that since the house is his he pays for everything to do with the house,that is mortgage,council tax and repairs.I pay for everything else,i.e anything to do with the kids the dogs and all bills,gas,elec,phone,clothes,food,birthdays and christmas,insurances,dental,optician,and so on.
When we need something for the house like a sofa or toaster I do the soft furnishings and he does the electrical stuff.He covers the most expensive stuff as he is the main wage earner.I am only self-employed part trime and work bloomin hard.I have cleared all the debts I run up while I was not working as I still had the same expenses and yes now I will make a start on the other debts too.

shelovestobuystuff

YorkshireBoy wrote: »

Is it now a case of "what's ours is ours"? (you'll have to say something like this at the ceremony...can't remember exactly because it's a long time since I said it!)

You talk of our mortgage, our house repairs, our wedding...but then you talk of his debt.

Seems like you should (if you can?) take on some of his debt, since you clearly appear to be 'benefitting' from it.


EDIT: Crossed with your post about your "low income". Could you earn more? Second job etc?

Yes I can earn more,and I suppose I will now that this has come to light, but he will complain that things are not done around the house.I have worked full time,2 jobs and college and managed the house before and decided to go part time so I could fit in everything I had to do and keep everyone happy.Guess I will just have to squeeze more hours into the day.

Jennifer_Jane

shelovestobuystuff wrote: »

Yes I can earn more,and I suppose I will now that this has come to light, but he will complain that things are not done around the house.I have worked full time,2 jobs and college and managed the house before and decided to go part time so I could fit in everything I had to do and keep everyone happy.Guess I will just have to squeeze more hours into the day.

Ouch! I wouldn't like that! Reminds me of 1956.
Jen
x

YorkshireBoy

OK, reality check time.

At 34.9% APR (or whatever it is), his - and soon to be your - minimum payment will barely cover the interest charged each month.

This will mean you'll be paying well over £6,000 per year in interest alone...and this time next year you'll STILL owe £19,000.

Sod the house, and "getting things done". Get a(nother) job...now!

shelovestobuystuff

Thanks.I have been up late online looking for anything in my area.Theres jobs at the spar but its in a rough area and hubby2b has asked me not to apply for a job there in the past as its quite dangerous.Theres always vacancies so I will keep that as a last resort.
I have sent an online form to be notified of asda vacancies and will pop into the tescos stores to ask too.Night time shifts would be best as I can still fit everything in and get some sleep when the youngest is at school.
I have the ref numbers of a couple of jobs and the jobcentre plus number to call about those tomorrow,no today,well later anyway.The jobs are nighttime from11pm-7am so I can still make it home to get littlest one up and off to school,walk the dogs at the same time and then come home and sleep.Its just £5.73 an hour but 32 hours,dont even know what the job is yet?
Hubby2b has been snobbish about me applying for supermarket jobs in the past but he is in no position to be fussy.
I would love to work at tesco and get discount eventually on my groceries as well as a wage.
I am sure I will have more ideas and I can still manage my little business too.

Grade_A_Reject

shelovestobuystuff wrote: »

Anyway the 6k wont be wasted we will enjoy it very much.

Is there no way you could postpone the wedding and direct the £6k at the debt?

I know you say you've waited 18yrs but surely a little longer wouldn't hurt. No matter how enjoyable the day by not using the money to clear off the CC debt you're effectively funding your wedding on a credit card at 30%.

toby2

Cat695 wrote: »

My tone?? because I'm straight to the point people don't like it......yes I'm sorry the OP has been caught out but why blame the CC companies.....If you can't be bothered to read T&C then you only have yourself to blame

Banks like any other company are after one thing and thats money.....and they will go after the most easiest way to get it and that are the people who can't take 5 mins out of their lives to read through the Doc's

Am I not the one that is helping them?? fine telling someone your feeling sorry for them may make them feel better for a while....but pointing out the mistake so they can learn from it will be far more beneficial...will it not??

Banks are out to rip you off any chance they get...especially now.

As a young lad I got caught out....and never will again

I'd like to add pompous, arrogant and patronising to sanctimonious