Pocket money (merged)

arthur_dent_2

Older not wiser, do you think I am being mean or generous? Personally I don't think that £10 a week is too bad along with the £20 phone credit. I only get £20 'pocket money' to spend on myself and 2 children.

lrr_2

can you not contact the phone company and put a limit on it? i know some people see them as a luxury but in this day and age i see them as a safety feature. you would never forgive yourself if she needed you and could get in touch. from what you say she sounds like a really nice kid and just being a hormonal teenager. she could be doing a lot worse! yes girls stuff does cost a lot but just sit her down and explain you just cant afford it - like most just now and if she wants little extras she will have to find a way of funding it i.e babysitting for relatives kids etc.

pinkangelnic

When I was 16 and I am 22 now my mum used to give me my chb. I had to budget over the 4 weeks to make it last which has taught me how to manage my money now that I'm paid monthly.
as regards to the mobile phone, deduct this from the ammount of chb, if the bills higher she gets less money, teaches her the skills of "real life"

I know this seems like a lot but this would be it, i'd have to buy my clothes and anything i needed for school out of this, the only thing my else my parents gave me was a roof over my head and food to eat

Mrs_Moc

pinkangelnic wrote: »

When I was 16 and I am 22 now my mum used to give me my chb. I had to budget over the 4 weeks to make it last which has taught me how to manage my money now that I'm paid monthly.
as regards to the mobile phone, deduct this from the ammount of chb, if the bills higher she gets less money, teaches her the skills of "real life"

I know this seems like a lot but this would be it, i'd have to buy my clothes and anything i needed for school out of this, the only thing my else my parents gave me was a roof over my head and food to eat

I do a slightly similar thing with my 14 yo. I have a standng order which goes into her account every week for £20 and she has a debit card for this account.

She is expected to maintain her own PAYG phone, cinema trips and any extra's including clothes.

I believe this teaches her the value of money and helps her learn how to budget. She is also expected to do the dishes every night and help out on Sunday at a market stall we run.

I know some of my friends feel what she receives is excessive, but I disagree and before this system was put in place about 8 months ago, I was definitely spending more than £20 per week once clothes were accounted for.

Hell_Dans_Un_Handcart

I am a bit confused, really: so a part time job might infringe on study time and lower grades. Surely if you're giving them money to go out, the going out will infringe too? It all depends on the child.

I don't think there's anything wrong with a part time job, so long as it isn't silly hours. I also don't think there's anything wrong with pocket money, so long as it is earned. We have a system in this house where it's £3 per job, and payment is once a month directly into her bank account. We pay for things like basic toiletries, school bits etc, and she has to budget for everything else, including her phone. It means she learns about money and learns how to wash her clothes, wash pans properly etc at the same time. One job, five days a week = £15 per week, which is perfectly reasonable, even for a 6th former - and it needn't take up that much time. If they have a job and don't have time, then their money is coming from elsewhere anyway.

I think you can have mobile phone contracts capped at a certain amount; would that be worth looking into?

remembered_nights

From 16 I didn't get EMA (alas) and worked Saturdays (and bank holidays etc) in a shoe shop to earn money. I don't remember any problems fitting in A-levels, various music groups and work! I thought that was a myth created by teens who don't want to have to get a job

Re the mobile, my cousin is on a contract that cuts off after you have used your text and minutes allowance for the month - could you look into something like that?

hipomad

check to see if and when she could get ema,it may be in sep. after she turns 17. This would be for traveling lunch and things shewill need,
I think at 16 she should have a part time job and not pocket money.
its hard for children to understand that its not parents sole role to provide for everthing anymore, so they just carry on and dont often think that they should be doing something to help themselves out
when my yd was 16 and at college she got ema that helped with her traveling cost but not much else.
I explained that she neede to earn some money each week for the extras that she wanted. she couldnt get a good shift from one employer so worked for a couple of places on min.wage to fit in with her studies and free time. She never earned a great wage but realised how much we were actualy helping her out with money and how it all added up over a month. It didnt take her long to plan her spending and how she could economise. If there was something she needed we would try and match what she had saved.
she is on an aprentice scheme at the moment so still learning and she still has 2 extra jobs.
since doing this we have not had to help her out and she has become very good with her money, but times being what they are one of her jobs have just been reduced by half, so to help her we will stop taking any housekeep of her and she helps me with things in the house as she feels she needs to do something for me.
She has even changed her mobile to payg so she cannot go over her set £.
It is no longer taken for granted or assumed that mum and dad will pay these thing. I am very proud of the way her attitude to money has changed, and i think they only thought like that through our own doing.

Lunar_Eclipse

arthur_dent wrote: »

Older not wiser, do you think I am being mean or generous? Personally I don't think that £10 a week is too bad along with the £20 phone credit. I only get £20 'pocket money' to spend on myself and 2 children.

I think she thought it was generous. I think it's lovely that your suggestion was so generous given your £20 week for the three of you. As a matter of curiosity, what does this £20 cover? Is it pure fritter money or for regular extra curricular activities such as Brownies too?

arthur_dent_2

It is everything except bills and food. Brownies, kids pocket money, haircuts, family holiday, clothes etc. I am proud to say though that aside from Brownies fees and a pair of £9 jeans I have not spent a penny this month. meaning that I can pay my mum the money I owe her and start paying for my holiday.

Susan_Frost

I feel she should get pocket money each week (but dont ask me how much). It should cover a small amount of mobile calls and some extra. If she needs more money she works for it. At the moment she does not know how to budget, so this will encourage her.

I dont believe in youngsters who are studying hard having to spend a lot of time earning money as well. Better to have good grades than to be an expert ......whatever just to make a point.

However, jobs like babysitting can be done while studying, so she can do both at the same time.

Sounds like this was a one off, and she is little trouble to you generally.

But she does need to handle her own money. With no additions. Work out with her what you feel is fair, and leave her to it.