Pocket money (merged)

Prudent

I am looking for advise on the amount of pocket money I should give my 13 year old daughter.

She has taken a long time to come to grips with handling money, this is partly because she has dyslexia and finds all kind of personal organisation skills hard. However she has really tried hard over the last year and has become a keen bargain hunter like her mum! She is not though a good saver yet. I do insist that she puts some of her birthday money aside and can withdraw this when she goes on holiday or wants to buy a big item. If I didn't monitor this she would simply withdraw all the money. She does tend to spend what she has rather than save.

I give her £20 month to spend as she wishes. She also gets £2 twice a week for snacks at school (she takes a packed lunch). I buy her clothes, toiletries (though she buys makeup), any presents she needs for friends. I pay if she needs bus fairs or goes out with friends. I also buy all clothes. She is brilliant over clothes. She really loves them and because she likes to have plenty she is happy for me to buy them from charity shops, boots sales etc. She also buys a lot of what she wants from these too e.g. today she got 10 videos, all of which she has been looking for, for £2 at a boot sale.

She is not a demanding child and appreciates how much I do get from our budget - thanks to this site
However I do wonder if I am giving her enough?

helen21_2

Well im sure if you ask my 12 year old daughter she would tell your daughter what a lucky girl she is I could not afford to give mine £20 a month to buy whatever she wants. The best my dd gets is once a fortnight we go to town together and depending how we doing for money she usually gets a treat, but certainly not alot, but I must say she does not ask for much and fully understands how far our money doesn't go!!

Rikki

I would say if she is happy with how you work her money out now and doesn't seem to need any more I wouldn't change it.
It isn't about the amount you give her. It is as a parent: what you can afford, what she needs to spend it on, teaching her to save up for things and learning to respect money. There is no wrong or right amount its individual choice.

Gingham_Ribbon

It sounds like you're doing great to me. Would she be happy to take £2 (10%) of her money and put it into a long term savings account, and maybe another 10% to save up for short term bigger things? Since you seem to cover the essentials for her (going out money, pressies for friends, clothes, bus fares, snacks...) it sounds like she might be able to do that as a way of learning money skills.

Maybe when you feel she is ready, you could increase her allowance by a small amount and ask her to take one of those responsibilities on for herself (eg going out money.) She will learn that when it's gone she can't go out, or she'll learn to do free things!

patchwork_cat

I give my 12 year old 20 pounds a month. He gets all his clothes,toiletries, bus fares and money for a can at school every day.

Prudent

Gingham_Ribbon wrote:

It sounds like you're doing great to me. Would she be happy to take £2 (10%) of her money and put it into a long term savings account, and maybe another 10% to save up for short term bigger things? Since you seem to cover the essentials for her (going out money, pressies for friends, clothes, bus fares, snacks...) it sounds like she might be able to do that as a way of learning money skills.

Maybe when you feel she is ready, you could increase her allowance by a small amount and ask her to take one of those responsibilities on for herself (eg going out money.) She will learn that when it's gone she can't go out, or she'll learn to do free things!

Yes I have been wondering about giving her a little more responsibilty. She doesn't tend to spend a lot on going out as she tends to go to friends houses. We do quite a bit with family friends and she has fter school activities so free time often used up.

I think 10% is a great idea to save. That seems a realistic and managable amount. I wondered about asking her to take on buying birthday pressies as this is a bit trickier to budget as they are irregular.

I did offer her a clothing allowance but she said see would find that hard. She is aware of her own difficulties with organisation and I just try and encourage her to take on what she would feel ok with. We do a little step more every year.

Prudent

helen21 wrote:

Well im sure if you ask my 12 year old daughter she would tell your daughter what a lucky girl she is I could not afford to give mine £20 a month to buy whatever she wants. The best my dd gets is once a fortnight we go to town together and depending how we doing for money she usually gets a treat, but certainly not alot, but I must say she does not ask for much and fully understands how far our money doesn't go!!

You make me feel better! A lot of her friends get amounts which I feel are just daft e.g £20 weekly! My daughter never pushes for more. Like many single parents I often wish I was in a position to provide more, even though I know my love and time and the most important things I can give her.

I am sure our daughter's will grow up appreciating the value of money.

Gingham_Ribbon

I also think that if you wrote down how much all the other things you pay for that lots of people expect their kids to pay for out of their pocket money, she'll be able to see what she's aiming for. (In that she'll be able to do it for herself out of her pocket money or Saturday job money.)

At that age, my pocket money paid for going out, records, make up and toiletries. I insisted on (and still do) things that weren't tested on animals and since they were more expensive I was to provide them for myself, so lots of it went to the Body Shop and BUAV shop!

You and your daughter know her limitations and how much you can stretch her learning. Slow and steady wins the race! I bet by the time she's 18, she'll be telling you how to budget!

Bennifred

Crikey, you all make me feel mean! My 12 year old son gets given £12 per month pocket money. I buy all his clothes, gifts for friends, guitar lessons and reading books (although he is dyslexic, he loves to read and I love to encourage that!). He has to buy any toys or other things out of his pocket money, and he gives me £2 to put into his savings account. If he wants more for any particular thing, he earns it by washing the cars or other extra chores. Sometimes he has to wait for quite a few months before he has enough. This follows the pattern used with his older siblings, and I think (hope!) they all know that money doesn't grow on trees, is hard come by and disappears all too quickly if not looked after! Also they value what they have saved hard for much more than if they were given it on a plate.

elisebutt65

Good Grief - I wish I'd had that much when I was 13!!

At the minute my eldest boy (10) gets 50p a week which he saves up religously and deposits in his Abbey account + his birthday and Xmas money, then he splurges on 2nd hand Gameboy stuff once or twice a year. I get him his weekly Beano and subscribe to Horrible Science for him. As soon as he's 13 he'll be doing a paper round (according to him).

The youngest(5) gets 20p a week for his piggy bank and they both get a share of any coppers lying around in my purse on a Friday - the silver goes in the Whisky bottle for holidays.

They also get 10-50p a week depending on the state of their incentive charts - LOL.

Gingham_Ribbon

I LOVE the incentive chart idea!

Here's my ponder about this. My son's not 2 yet, so I don't have to worry about the pocket money thing for a while but I do expect him to 'help' with the housework already. (Tidies his books into his book box, helps carry his plate to the kitchen, helps spread his sandwiches, picks up food he's thrown on the floor etc.)

BUT, how do you teach kids that the chores are a family thing that everyone should contribute to, but also give them the incentive of pocket money for doing it? Do people have an extra list of chores that pocket money can be awarded for as well as the ordinary ones they're expected to do as part of the household?