Help!

cantcope

Hi Bonsibabe. Please dont feel that you are being berated on this board. I think we are just trying to figure out how to help. You say your OH lost his job in August and had a few months without work. That would be hard for any family.
If you post a "real" SOA, one of what you spend, not what you've been told to put it would make it easier. For me looking at your SOA as it is i see no evidence that you've cut back since August even though I am sure you have.

I lost my job in May and have not been earning enought o cover my bills since then. I am supplementing my salary with savings i had (luckily). However, I go out once a month, dont buy clothes and dont buy anything i dont need. I've worked out i can last a year like this before savings are nil if i dont find a better job.

It's tough out there at the moment and you need to adjust to your new income. I know its hard, i'm only earning 70% of what i used to and only got my mortgage in April!

Workwise for you. How about trying something like telephone or internet work? Things you can do from home and often choosing your own hours.

If you get DLA can you get Mobility too? This might help with cartax etc. Worth checking out anything at the moment to get you all through this tough time.

You say you have £100 worth of Amazon vouchers. Can you sell these (codes) on ebay to get cash instead? From what i've seen the most you are likely to lose is a fiver but cash would mean you can get presents in the sales and have a bit left over to have nice dinner on christmas day.

If not, dont worry about buying growing veggies books, this info can all be found on the internet for free.

If you cant manage to get the kids many presents how about making it seem more by setting up a santa trail for them. white talc foot prints or written clues for them to follow to each present. it will keep them occupied and add to the excitement for them without them noticing the lack of pressies.

I really hope things start to look up for you in the new year and that you take as much advice and support as you can from here. It's been invaluable to me over the years and although now debt free its proving invaluable now as i too struggle with making ends meet.

Good luck xxx

bonsibabe

Cantcope - thank you. I don't want to sound ungrateful to anyone posting here. It's just the situation is getting me down so much. I have had depression before and am noticing the signs again but because we are waiting to get the keys to our house it is getting harder and harder to keep smiling. I do try to keep things as "normal" as possible for the children but when they are not around it's hard to keep my chin up at all. There have been times I have considered doing something stupid as the insurance money would pay the debts off but I couldn't do that to my kids, they are the ones keeping me going.

I have been trawling through the up your income threads. I decided to go backwards incase there was anything in any of the older posts but have yet to see anything. I have tried the textperts challenge twice and failed it both times (the second time with 81%!). Am going to email AQA as well and keep trying with textperts. I'm degree educated so there must be something I can do from home. It is hard to trawl through the millions of scams out there to try and find something that is genuine but am keeping at it.

The best part is today the car blew a tire! So its 50 miles from home outside my friends house and hubby has no transport so will have to get a bus to the nearest town then walk from there. He is going to have to leave at silly o clock in the morning to get to work on time tomorrow. Hopefully our friend can get the car fixed as it means I am now housebound and can't get out at all. Thankfully we had roadside assistance through the bank but they were no use at all. Blooming car didn't even come with a spare tyre, it came with a reinflation kit that didnt work so the manufacturer is getting a snotty email to tell them that we will never be buying another car from them again.

Anyway, best get back to trawling the boards in the hope of finding some kind of legit work I can do at home when the kids are in bed and OH is around to help around the house. I may even be able to do a couple of hours during the day as well if I can get something. Fingers crossed.

Edit - Forgot to add that the DLA i get is mobility and we get free car tax already on the car so that has saved us some money. We have cancelled a lot of direct debits that were just for our hobbies and subscriptions. The car insurance will be coming down and we have 2 months cover left and no payments to make. Am going to request a payment holiday from one loan for january's payment to give us a little bit of breathing space and give ssafa a chance to get back to us.

With regard to the Amazon vouchers, we actualy have 3 kids to get pressies for as OH has a child from a previous relationship. So they will only get a couple of pressies each and then it will probly only be DVDs that we can get on Amazon. I also have a load of stuff to list on ebay but can't get to it as it is all in boxes so as soon as we move I can get it all listed and start to make some money on it (and declutter at the same time). Am actually going to put a request on freecycle to see if anyone wants my old double bed and sofa bed as we don't have the room for them in the new house.

Thanks again

Thanks again, just feeling like its all getting on top of me. x

cantcope

Hi Bonsibabe.
Sorry to hear you are feeling so down. We've all been there. It helps to get out it and thats why i found these boards so helpful.
Sounds like you've got Christmas sorted so at least thats one thing you dont need to worry about. have a look on the freebies board too for little stocking fillers.

If you feel like you or the kids need a treat make sure you use any tesco clubcard vouchers wisely. I use mine for a magazine subscription and my RAC cover. something i need and something i want but cant justify spending money on.

Your sig says you want to pay it off as quick as possible. Try not to put too much pressure on yourselves. What happened was out of your control and you are doing something about it now.

Re: car. these things are sent to try us. like me finally getting debt free, getting a mortgage then being made redundant a week later! i promise these things can make you stronger. Please dont think about leaving your children. I am 100% certain they'd rather have nothing but their mums love. Money's nice but love is better xxxx

mummytofour

Hiya, You say you are getting free car tax, so am I correct in thinking you are on higher rate mobility? As i cant see the DLA in your SOA there is £100 under other benefits but higher rate DLA is more than this. Also if you get higher rate DLA then you can use this for a free motability car. I guess you probably want the money right now tho opposed to a car.

I think if you can find a way of getting shot of the car you have and picking up a £500 car ( maybe ask family if they can give/lend you the money) That would really help out.

Also can you get DLA care? This comes in 3 rates and from what you have said you sounds like you may qualify.

Good luck on your quest x

bonsibabe

Hiya and thank you for your advice. Yes I do get dla, have i put down £100, stupid me its £180 a month. At the moment we are living on that plus tax credits, that is what is paying for food, clothing and utilities. If anyone in the family could help us out to getting a cheap car they would. The only person who financially could help has not even bothered to get in touch, even though OH has asked him to (it is his dad but he is not one who would help us). The other members of our family want to help but are suffering the credit crunch themselves and just cant afford it. If I could get a cheap car tomorrow I would do it and give the car company the original car back, it would drop a heck of a lot of worry.

I hadn't thought about DLA care. As I am almost housebound I suppose I would qualify. I think I have a mindset that I don't like to think of myself as disabled, but am just starting to accept the conditions I have will never go away but gradually get worse. Funny thing is that its taken me 17 years to accept that. Shows how stubborn I am.

Cantcope - don't worry, its my kids that keep me going on the bad days. I could never leave them. It just gets hard and its when i'm lying in bed that these things pop into my head. But am tryingto get back to normal without resorting to tablets, have had them before and all i did was sleep!

So am trying my best to stay hopeful. I have noticed that my quidco account is up £9! Not much but a bonus for cashing in 2 phones. And I got £9.99 cheque for them the other day so £18.99 for two phones. Just got to dig out the other 2 and they are worth about £7 each so that would be another £14 -its not much to come off the overdraft but like a certain supermarket says - every little helps. And if I can get that payment holiday on one of the loans then that will help as well.

Am also waiting for the information on PPI that I have requested. I have estimated I could possibly claim back enough to maybe pay off the larger loan. The smaller one we could manage if that was all we were paying out.

Hopefully this week will hear about the money OH previous employer owes us and we are also waiting for the insurance company to get back to us about money that was taken from OH final wage. Thankfully we are insured for things like that. That would help as well!

If ssafa can help with the car then that would take a load of our minds, we could then just accept the money we were offered from a local car dealer (£5K less than we owe on the car) and we could get a smaller car and have some cash left over to pay off other debts.

Just trying to live in hope that they would come back with some good news before christmas. Don't really think that it will happen but have to try and stay positive.

Mummy - thank you for telling me about DLA care. I will get on the phone tomorrow and get the application process started. If I can get that, then when it does get paid, it will certainly help to keep our heads above water and make for a better christmas next year. If we get into our new house before this christmas then my parents will be coming for the day and if I know my mum, she will probably make sure that we have enough to feed everyone for the whole time.

Many thanks for the help and advice, I really do appreciate it xxxx

findingmyfeet

hi there, not much use on the debt side of things but after having several hard christmas's i have found a few ways of doing things cheaper ofr for free.

Go into your local library and see whats happening in your area. Near me there are lots of forests etc and the council run lots of free stuff for kids in the run up tp xmas. craft sessions, frosty snowman walks by torch light etc. , picnics with hot soups and hot chocolate flasks , My kids used to love it. Yes its not the same as spending loads but kids love it, no need to stay home. Also join the library get free loans of all the cookbooks and gardening , plus they do dvds and spoken word cds too and free or reduced rrate because you are disabled.
Christmas day why not get your other credit crunch relatives together, split the food costs and have a fun family time, play games with the kids and other people to talk to and have a laugh with. Do lots of xmas baking , you can make loads of goodies for next to nothing and remember to freeze some too .
There are some seasonal jobs from home, in my area lots of stay at home mums have been maikng xmas crackers for the big supermarkets. Not mega money but stuff is out there.
Good luck, chin up and remember lots of people are in the same boat as you but lots just dont admit it.

Arne_2

I think that you really need to be moved into your new home because then you will be able to assess your needs and options for reducing your spending. Your rent, council tax may be different, because you will have access to all your stuff it will be easier to cook from scratch. Have you been given a date yet? I would open the basic bank account, make a list of all the people you need to notify about your new address and try to focus on the move and a good it will be to be close to family when you feel down. There is only about 20 odd days to go and then it will be a new year, new start and a new life.

sarahs999

Not much advice for you but just wanted to send good luck rather than read and run. Been following this one.

penniesgrowintopounds

Another well-wisher checking in here. TRY TO STAY STRONG, AND YOU'LL GET THROUGH THIS. x

Ames

Hold on a minute, before you reapply for DLA. If you reapply there's a chance you'll lose the award you've got. You need proper help from a welfare rights officer before you do anything, they can assess your claim and let you know if they think it's safe for you to reapply. I use DIAL, but in the past I've used a disablement action group, and there's CAB. They should be able to do house visits if you're housebound.

As for bankruptcy, unless the furniture is antique chippendale or something then they won't be interested in that. I'm not sure about the jewellery though, you could always post on the bankruptcy board and ask them.

Are you moving to a council estate? You might find there's loads more for you and the kids to do, there is here, we've got arts classes, photography classes and all sorts.