Icesave Veterans Association

harrowing_3

let's have your funny anecdotes to start 2009; this may not be one but here goes....
At my final year at Uni I stayed in a large house and the landlady owner was a lady of irritatingly immense energy, so highly charged you could get a shock. She was country-bumpkin posh, and eccentric with it: e.g. she named her cat "posh-paws". My fellow lodger nicknamed her "Wacky Jacky"...

Anyway, her husband was not so full of life's joy: he trudged around looking weary and generally escaping Wacky with his head in a book or sloping off into his workshop to do workshop-type things.
After an episode in which he DARED to express a lack of enthusiasm for a Jacky idea and got an ear full, I heard him resorting to talking to the cat with:
"My God posh-paws...a man isn't even allowed to be miserable around here!!"

Priceless, the words and tone will always live with me!

harrowing_3

amistupid

harrowing wrote: »

This baby polar bear was sat with his mum on an ice berg.
"Mum," he asked, "am I a real polar bear?"
"Yes darling, of course you are." his mother answered.

"Yeah but, am I a proper polar bear, you know, a real one?"
"Yes dear," his mum replied, "You're dad is a polar bear, I'm a polar bear and your sister's a polar bear."
"I know that mum," he said, "but am I a proper polar bear?"
"Of course you are" said his mum, "now shut up and eat your penguin."
A minute later the baby polar bear asks "Mum, I know what you've said, but am I really a proper polar bear?"
"Look," she says, "you are a proper bloody polar bear alright. What's wrong with you? Why do you keep asking me that?"
"Well," he replies, "I'm flipping freezing"

Sorry couldn't resist. The old 'uns are best

amistupid

harrowing wrote: »

let's have your funny anecdotes to start 2009; this may not be one but here goes....
At my final year at Uni I stayed in a large house and the landlady owner was a lady of irritatingly immense energy,

Whilst going through my divorce I took lodgings with a lady who suffered from ME, more life in a flat battery. She organised a barbeque for fellow suffers, what a fiasco, no one had the energy to cook, they all ended up eating salad. :rotfl:

That's a true story. It took me weeks to get through 10lb of bangers and 3 dozen beef burgers.

amistupid

st any fireworks last night?

st

happy new year ami yes but they only lasted for 5-10 minutes normally is like ww2 for 1 hour so bed after sex and the city on fiver and some tom cruise risky biz.
and not one drop of alcohol for me -still not feeling too well with my gastro probs:mad:

st

amistupid

Happy New Year to you both from us two. Hope you feel better soon

st

amistupid wrote: »

This baby polar bear was sat with his mum on an ice berg.

"Mum," he asked, "am I a real polar bear?"
"Yes darling, of course you are." his mother answered.

"Yeah but, am I a proper polar bear, you know, a real one?"
"Yes dear," his mum replied, "You're dad is a polar bear, I'm a polar bear and your sister's a polar bear."
"I know that mum," he said, "but am I a proper polar bear?"
"Of course you are" said his mum, "now shut up and eat your penguin."
A minute later the baby polar bear asks "Mum, I know what you've said, but am I really a proper polar bear?"
"Look," she says, "you are a proper bloody polar bear alright. What's wrong with you? Why do you keep asking me that?"
"Well," he replies, "I'm flipping freezing"

Sorry couldn't resist. The old 'uns are best

:rotfl: A Polar bear walks into a bar and says to the barman,
"I'll have a gin.............................................................
..................................................................and tonic."
The Barman says...."What's with the big pause?"
The bear replies, "I don't know... My father had them, too!!!"

st

Now I know why people buy The Sun:D