A friend in need. Apparently.

bargainbetty

I've got a variation on this one.... a mate of mine is starting a business and although he has investment his monthly wage barely covers his rent and living expenses. I've helped him out quite a bit both financially and practically with the business by way of support, which was fine until I lost my job due to this joyous recession. Thank heaven for savings...... Anyway, life can get a bit dull without outside entertainment, so we still try to have a quiet pint out or use vouchers for a 2-4-1 meal once week or fortnight.

Anyway, last week his credit rating seemed to improve as he was finally granted a credit card (only did the application to see if he would be accepted). The card arrived, and the idiot promptly used the card to buy things we already had in the house, a couple of luxuries as 'a treat' and then went out on a date with someone, paying entirely on credit. His response to my pointing out he could never afford a clear the debt without incurring interest....?

'I'll figure something out.'

I could have cheerfully punched him. Complete t*t.

izzybusy23

MrsPitcher2b wrote: »

Hello everyone

I just wanted to sort of vent my anger somewhere.. I am getting so wound up by someone i work with. She is a lovely lady but recently my opinion seems to be changing.

She has always struggled with money, and i always felt really bad for her having to get by on her own as her husband left her (about 10 years ago mind you but still i would not be able to cope with a mortgage on my own) I thought her mortgage was like 800 a month, its not - have since learned its £250 a month, and her son pays her £300 a month rent anyway. I know that doesnt include food/bills/water etc but still she is basically getting her mortgage paid for her there.

Now she pleads poverty alot, and has been overdrawn by alot so ended up getting a loan from work. She also got an insurance pay out thing, of only 700 quid but still its alot. And today she is back overdrawn??

And i started thinking well where does her money go. She is on more money than me ( by 5 grand) and eats out for lunch 3 days a week. I wish i could afford the place they eat at!! I end up staying in because i know its a waste of money, and if i was in that bad debt how she claims to be, then that would be the first thing to cut down on?!

She drinks wine - a bottle a night, well thats not cheap. but i know its hard to quit so fair enough. But trhen she said today oh im taking my son out to this restaurant up in docklands for a treat - Well thats not gonna be cheap is it?!! I just think everything she spends her money on is such a waste, and yet she pleads poverty...

I know you have to have your LBM before you realise whats happening, but even before my LBM, i stopped drinking and didnt eat out because after the minimum payments i had just enough to live on!!

I dont mean to offend anyone but its just got on me nerves...

Maybe i should introduce her to MSE

I used to work with a girl like that too. Forever asking to borrow 50p for a bag of crisps from the vending machine, or £2 because she didn't have any money for lunch.. but then she was quite happy buying leather settee's from NEXT, designer wallpaper and wall tiles, eating out at expensive restaurants with a bottle of chablis to boot. I think her boyfriend even bought her a designer bikini from milan via the internet once which cost over £100 because she saw it on holiday and didn't have the money to buy it at the time.. so yes, totally used to frustrate me too, but luckily I don't work with people like that anymore.

And the funny thing is that she used to get the MSE newsletter sent to her email at work.. go figure!!

PinkTwirl

I knew a girl where I used to live that I worked with who kept going on about her £50K of debt yet kept buying Karen Millen matching shoes and handbags at £400 at time. She said to me in the pub one night "oh, I'm really hungry, but I haven't got any money on me". I shouted her a £15 meal but I was in £20K of debt myself so next day I asked her to give me the money. She did, but she never invited me to anything again.

Then she stabbed me in the back at work. That was the end of my use to her!

There are lots of spongers out there.

edinburgher

PinkTwirl wrote: »

Then she stabbed me in the back at work. That was the end of my use to her!

There are a lot of spongers out there.

With friends like that, eh? A good policy (in an ideal world) would be to borrow nothing and only offer advice (thanks MSE forums!)

Miss_Piggy_2

Haven't read all the replies, and I may be inviting people to have a go at me here, but ....haven't we all been like this at some point?

I know a few years ago, when I had credit cards, I would flash the cash for any reason. Only it wasn't cash. It was credit. And I'm paying for it now.

So yes, its ok to be annoyed. But just bear in mind, your friend is years behind on the lightbulb moment. In years to come, you will be in a better position than her.

Miss P
xx

laurenjs88

My best friend is like that she works full time on £6ph , she goes out with her fiancee every weekend on the booze, £100 on her phone, gives her mum £100 a month rent for herself & spends money on fags, Yet pleads poverty to me constantly, even to the point where she "borrows" money off me for her cigeratte habit, not that ive ever seen a penny of it back!! Whilst im a single mum on benefits with no CS and paying off loads of my daughters dads debts!! lol its frustrating to listen to, but it reminds me as much as i love her, just how simple she is!

Her fiancee also works full time on like £10ph and lives rent free with his mum. Where all their money goes i really dont know lol!!

PinkTwirl

edinburgher wrote: »

With friends like that, eh? A good policy (in an ideal world) would be to borrow nothing and only offer advice (thanks MSE forums!)

Too true. She said to me that the bullying I was receiving at work was out of order. Yet when I called her as a witness, she put the knife into me and said it was my fault.

Evil.

Miss_Piggy_2

laurenjs88 wrote: »

My best friend is like that she works full time on £6ph , she goes out with her fiancee every weekend on the booze, £100 on her phone, gives her mum £100 a month rent for herself & spends money on fags, Yet pleads poverty to me constantly, even to the point where she "borrows" money off me for her cigeratte habit, not that ive ever seen a penny of it back!! Whilst im a single mum on benefits with no CS and paying off loads of my daughters dads debts!! lol its frustrating to listen to, but it reminds me as much as i love her, just how simple she is!

Her fiancee also works full time on like £10ph and lives rent free with his mum. Where all their money goes i really dont know lol!!

I don't mean this in horrible way, but WHY do you "lend" her money then?

Miss P
xx

clearmydebts

I was probably like that a few years ago. Always pleading poverty and then going on flashy holidays etc etc. It takes people different lengths of time to realise their debt and have the LBM.

On the flipside, I had a friend who was always pleading poverty and her version of being 'poor' was having about 5k in the bank so I think it is all relative.

laura2481

PinkTwirl wrote: »

Too true. She said to me that the bullying I was receiving at work was out of order. Yet when I called her as a witness, she put the knife into me and said it was my fault.

Evil.

OOOOhhhh, that is evil. Don't worry, karma will come and kick her in the a**e sooner or later. And when you hear about it, you have my permission to laugh!