Mental Health and Debt: Mental Health Workers & Others Feedback Needed

in Debt-Free Wannabe
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  • jaja_3jaja_3 Forumite
    130 Posts
    I dont want to clog up this thread too much so wont drone on.

    But, the OH was actually off work with stress and nervous exhaustion which lead to his having to leave for health reasons. The RBS took this time to bully him into another loan over the phone by saying they would send him to jail if he didnt do it. The debts were business ones, which he was forced to putting into his own name, bullied beyond belief.
    Of course now there is no proof of this and years later we are still paying the price.
    That and when he went on the strongest of anti-depressants and we were in deep trouble financially he went out and bought a new car, as the world was all rosy again in his drugged up mind.
    Still paying the price on that one too.

    Will be really interested to see the new article. Thank you for caring Martin.
  • dNDdND Forumite
    496 Posts
    Part of the Furniture 100 Posts Photogenic
    When I had my breakdown and for that matter since, I found that remembering to get things done or being able to motivate myself to get things done disappeared completely. Had I not had most of the bills on DD, they wouldn't have been paid. I was lucky to have a cash reserve - I was saving for a mega holiday to celebrate my 50th and it was those savings that saw me through.

    At the time I was ill there was no way I would have been capable of sorting anything out for myself and my treatment was to be given the Prozac and told to come back for check-ups when I needed the repeat prescription. Apart from that I was on my own - I could have so easilly got into serious debt.
  • I think there are lots of people who are not aware that they have a mental health problem.

    I work for a local Women's Aid refuge offering a community based support service for women who have escaped from domestic abuse. My job kicks in as they move out of the refuge and in to their new homes free from abuse. Many targets of abuse have been convinced by their perpetrators that everything bad is their fault and never will they be able to cope without them, they come to believe it and can freeze the moment a bill lands on the doormat. They do not necessarily associate their issues with those falling under the umbrella of 'mental health' because they blame themselves or believe they are stupid.

    Once someone is aware their struggle to cope is connected to their mental health and it is not their fault, they can shake off the feeling of shame and are more likely to start accessing appropriate support.
    Domestic Violence and Abuse 24hr freephone helpline for FEMALE TARGETS - 0808 2000 247.

    For MALE TARGETS - 0808 801 0327.

    Free legal advice on WOMEN'S RIGHTS - 020 7251 6577.
    PM me for further support / links to websites.
  • just wanted to say, Well Done to all who have posted so far. Its very hard to admit you have depression. I spent many years in denial. I now stand proud, and admit it openly, its only took me 20 years!

    Anyway, am looking forward to the outcome.

    best wishes everyone and a big 'well done'
    Toughest form of moutain climbing is climbing out of a rut
    I WILL be debt free!
    I WILL be happy!
    red pen member 4
  • KarmacatKarmacat Forumite
    36.7K Posts
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    I work as a counsellor in the private sector, so everyone that comes to see me can afford a certain minimum hourly payment. However, just thinking of some general points from people I've seen over the years:
    - people in their early twenties who've had a very disrupted home life, possibly even though they have two parents still physically present. Several clients of mine fitting this description literally didn't know what a budget was, i.e. writing down weekly/monthly/quarterly/annual outgoings, and comparing it to available income.
    - some of the most vulnerable people I've seen are those who've been given asylum in this country after being tortured in their country of origin, e.g. getting here after sponsorship by Amnesty International. They probably don't know English, it could well be a different climate, they will literally only have the clothes they stand up in. There may be a small community here of compatriots, but those people are also likely to be suffering severe trauma.

    In both cases, basic education and assistance is what's needed, whether in English or another language.
    Downsized and paid off mortgage 2010
    Retired August 2016
    Paid off French mortgage September 2018
    New kitchen fully installed June 2019
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    Garden fencing completed, woohoo 2021.......... Bunny hugger
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  • I have been suffering with depression since I lost my partner 18 mths ago. Part of it is due to grief but I am sure that an even bigger part is due to the debts I have had to face as I have got worse as my finances have got worse. I am still fighting to keep my house that holds so many memories for my daughter and I but all my energy is just ebbing away daily and its as much as I can do to get up and do the basics most days, everything else is such a big deal, unopened letters lie in a pile, phone calls to debtors get pushed aside...I know I am wrong for doing this but I just can't face it all on my own. I was referred to local mental health 6 mths ago and have seen a doctor about 3 times now but it doesn't seem to help much. I just need somebody to take all the responsibility off my shoulders, to help me deal with the debts. Someone told me to contact MIND as they said they have debt counsellors who will come to your home but when I phoned them I was told they didn't, only in very exceptional circumstances, they made an appointment for me to go to their centre and guess what............yes, you've guessed it, I didn't go. I just couldn't face it. Afterwards I felt guilty that I had taken an appointment from someone else who would have made use of it.

    I never realised that depression could affect so much of your daily life.
  • Homeworkgirl you raised some really important points in your post.

    It would seem at this time your needs are not being met by the services and one of the consequences is that your finances and debt management are suffering.

    I struggle with the notion that agencies are set up to help support vulnerable people then they present known barriers that stop the very people who need it from accessing the services.

    As far as I am concerned your circumstances are exceptional and you should be offered home support. The problem is you seem to need a support worker to advocate for you to access the very services you need.

    Depression can affect everything, however even if a service was avaible to you that had no barriers to accessing it, often ones own barriers are enough to get in the way and no one can start helping you to work on them without your participation.

    Please go back to MIND and present how bad things have now become and the risks at stake should you continue to deal with debt as you have been.
    Domestic Violence and Abuse 24hr freephone helpline for FEMALE TARGETS - 0808 2000 247.

    For MALE TARGETS - 0808 801 0327.

    Free legal advice on WOMEN'S RIGHTS - 020 7251 6577.
    PM me for further support / links to websites.
  • fermifermi Forumite
    40.6K Posts
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    Free/impartial debt advice: National Debtline | StepChange Debt Charity | Find your local CAB

    IVA & fee charging DMP companies: Profits from misery, motivated ONLY by greed
  • rugbymumrugbymum Forumite
    984 Posts
    I think that the hardest thing about having mental health problems is talking to ANYONE about ANYTHING.
    When you are totally lost in the fog inside your head just functioning for long enough to get washed & dressed is difficult. There are days when I am unable to string two coherent words together, let alone deal with my children, or anything approaching making responsible descisions.
    I've given up going to my GP who will tinker happily with my happy pill dosage, but won't refer me for a proper psychiatric assessment.
    On top having a nervous breakdown in 2005, I've been fighting depression and uncontrollable spending/lifestyle aspirations for the majority of my adult life.
    One thing that I have found that helps a lot at the moment is having somewhere "safe" to talk. I'm still in touch with reality (if you can call these forums reality), even if I can't get out of the house! I pop on and post occasionally, and even if noone talks back to me I still know that there are real people out there, pottering around, the same as me!
    LBM:FEB 2008
    MEMBER ABC 2010
  • sammy115sammy115 Forumite
    15.3K Posts
    Hi rugbymum, nice to meet somewhere other than the daily chat threads...

    I remember vividly the description of trying to function enough to get washed and dressed..your words brought it all back. I was extremely lucky to have a GP who cared and refered me for psychiatric help when i needed it and talking to someone who understood what I was going through was enough to pull me through some dark moments.

    I can't really contribute to this thread - I really just wanted to say to rugbymum - take help where you can - if that means posting on here, post away. We are all real people who have had problems like you in the past and understand. take care.xxxxx
    Quality is doing something right when no one is looking - Henry Ford
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