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Marriage is over - how can i sort things financially

Hi All,

Im really hoping someone can help so i can stop driving myself nuts with worry.

Basically on the 11th of September my Husband asked me for space so i moved out for a few days to give him that space, he then said that he did not want to continue to work at our marriage and that as far as he was concenerned it was all over.

We had no joint assets - just a lot of debt - all of which is in my name (yes i was stupid but i was just 22 when we met, 23 when we got married and now im 26 and its all over)

I have 2 credit cards, one loan and and car finance. Now i was lucky that he signed the car over to me (previously car was in his name finance in mine) we have seperated things as follows;

Credit card 1 - £4,500 - i pay £100 per month
Credit card 2 - £2,500 - we pay £50 a month each
Loan - £11,000 start - 3 years left to run, current balance around the £8,500 mark - he pays £278 per month
Car finance - £8,000 start - 3 years left to run - I pay £209 per month

All of this money comes from our joint account, which i have been infomed i cannot close or leave without his consent.

Also the bills for the electricity, telephone and the joint car insurance policy comes from this account. He was supposed to have changed this over when he decided he was going to take on the tenancy on his own - but hasnt done so.

I emailed him yesterday asking him to change it over as soon as possible as i am worried that the companies will start chasing me for money if he doesnt pay (at the moment he is paying and the money is in the account ready to cover this months bills but he has a really bad track record - ironically i helped him sort out all of his finances so that he could build a good credit rating again!!!!

I have thought about asking him to pay the money for the debt into my account, but he has started causing problems with his family (who want to stay in touch with me) and is starting to get vindictive and telling lots of lies so i really dont think he will.

As the debt is in my name can i arrange for the payments to come straight from his bank?

Can i remove myself from the account and seperate our finances?

Can i remove myself from the bills and make sure he is held responsible?

Any advice would be appreciated, thanks to this site i have been through my finances and have been able to fine somewhere to live, ive budgeted for rent (living with friends) and food etc, and the debt and ive started some savings up to cover car tax etc and still have a bit of spare cash for myself.

Thanks Puzzled

Comments

  • Hi hun
    sorry to hearyou are having to go through this.
    I really dont haveany answers about what you can do.
    Have you contacted cab to see if they can advise you or at least get you in touch with some debt help.
    You seem to be sorting yourself out and well done for that
    Sorry i cant be anymore help
  • Loretta
    Loretta Posts: 1,101 Forumite
    Hi All,

    Im really hoping someone can help so i can stop driving myself nuts with worry.

    Basically on the 11th of September my Husband asked me for space so i moved out for a few days to give him that space, he then said that he did not want to continue to work at our marriage and that as far as he was concenerned it was all over.

    We had no joint assets - just a lot of debt - all of which is in my name (yes i was stupid but i was just 22 when we met, 23 when we got married and now im 26 and its all over)

    I have 2 credit cards, one loan and and car finance. Now i was lucky that he signed the car over to me (previously car was in his name finance in mine) we have seperated things as follows;

    Credit card 1 - £4,500 - i pay £100 per month
    Credit card 2 - £2,500 - we pay £50 a month each
    Loan - £11,000 start - 3 years left to run, current balance around the £8,500 mark - he pays £278 per month
    Car finance - £8,000 start - 3 years left to run - I pay £209 per month

    All of this money comes from our joint account, which i have been infomed i cannot close or leave without his consent.

    Also the bills for the electricity, telephone and the joint car insurance policy comes from this account. He was supposed to have changed this over when he decided he was going to take on the tenancy on his own - but hasnt done so.

    I emailed him yesterday asking him to change it over as soon as possible as i am worried that the companies will start chasing me for money if he doesnt pay (at the moment he is paying and the money is in the account ready to cover this months bills but he has a really bad track record - ironically i helped him sort out all of his finances so that he could build a good credit rating again!!!!

    I have thought about asking him to pay the money for the debt into my account, but he has started causing problems with his family (who want to stay in touch with me) and is starting to get vindictive and telling lots of lies so i really dont think he will.

    As the debt is in my name can i arrange for the payments to come straight from his bank?

    Can i remove myself from the account and seperate our finances?

    Can i remove myself from the ills and make sure he is held responsible?

    Any advice would be appreciated, thanks to this site i have been through my finances and have been able to fine somewhere to live, ive budgeted for rent (living with friends) and food etc, and the debt and ive started some savings up to cover car tax etc and still have a bit of spare cash for myself.

    Thanks Puzzled

    Maybe some legal advice before it all goes even more wrong, he isn't taking long to start causing trouble and it will get worse
    Loretta
  • jellymid
    jellymid Posts: 338 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture Combo Breaker
    Hi,

    If you post again on the Debt Free Wanabee board, I'm sure that you will get a lot of really useful advice and support. There are many wise experts over there.

    Good luck
  • ameliarate
    ameliarate Posts: 7,389 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture 1,000 Posts Name Dropper
    I only know that things like the electricity and phone you can ring and cancelif they are in your name. You will get a final bill for them. He might get cut off but that's his problem (I would warn him first). Sorry I don't know about the loans etc.
    Good luck.
    We don't stop playing because we grow old; We grow old because we stop playing.
  • Thanks everyone - i will go and see the CAB as soon as possible, will also post this on the DFW board and see if anyone there can help.

    Thanks again

    Puzzled x
  • MrsTinks
    MrsTinks Posts: 15,238 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture 10,000 Posts Combo Breaker Name Dropper
    Technically any debts in your name are yours as far as the credit company is concerned... If he's going to continue paying it then great but you can't as it stands force him too... You MIGHT be able to get some of it assigned to him somehow through the divorce - I don't have any experience of that so don't know...
    The joint account needs to be closed - they will not take one partner off it and leave the other there - you both need to sign to close it and it needs to have any money owed paid off first.
    Until that happens you are both liable for any debt in the account :)
    Get legal advice! You will be better of getting it NOW than after things get really bad :)
    DFW Nerd #025
    DFW no more! Officially debt free 2017 - now joining the MFW's! :)

    My DFW Diary - blah- mildly funny stuff about my journey
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