taking 4 kids out at once and keeping everyone happy

3KIDSNOMONEY

i have 4 children and was wondering if anybody else felt like me. I have just read a thread on what things to do with kids. These ideas are great but i am finding it increasing difficult to please everyone with kids age 12 years to 8 months. obviously we tell the older ones that we used to do things for them when they were little so we still need to do things for the little ones.

i think the worst thing about taking the kids out anywhere is stress of having them all out. even a trip into town is severely stressful.

does anybody else who has more than 2 kids feel like this. sometimes i think that it is easier to stay indoors.

MILLYMOLLY

Hi
I have 4 boys close in age and i understand what you mean.
I don't know if you worry about what people around you think when your out and they start arguinh etc, but just block out everyone else and deal with it in your own way.

Use tesco clubcard deals for days out or look out fot local free activities during holidays etc.

Keep your chin up and remember they soon grow up and you will miss the arguing and fighting etc.:beer:

hippychick1

I know exactly what you mean, and I only have three to deal with!!! I find it so difficult, with mine being 6, nearly 3, and 1 yr old next week. Going food shopping can be a nightmare!

I give my boys things to look for when we're out, such as a dog, a person wearing a green coat etc... This tends to keep them quiet and busy for a while at least. Things like who can find the pasta first in Asda creates a better atmosphere than them being completely bored.

Since I have had my daughter, we try at least once a week to do an activity with the boys on their own, so they don't feel pushed out. My husband takes the eldest swimming on a sunday morning, and he also has an after school club he enjoys. DS2 enjoys baking with me once or twice a week when DD is asleep.

I do find it such a stretch finding time for them all, but it will get easier. That's what I keep telling myself anyway!!!!!

You're a star to be a mum to four children, and to be worried about their wellbeing shows what a great mum you are xx

blottedcopybook

I think hippchick1 is extremely brave even trying to take hers food shopping! I can't trust my little animals not to fill the trolley with capri suns and haribos so I order online.

I struggle with taking mine out too, the babies are quite happy doing anything but my seven year old is a right mardybum just now and nothing is good enough for him. It puts me off taking them anywhere because he just whines about how bored he is/how rubbish it is/how much more fun he has at his dads/grannys etc.

If you find a solution, sling it my way!

BernadetteN

Where do you live? Do you have a child-orientated museum near to you like Eureka in Halifax? A family of 6 there costs just £105 a year for unlimited entry and makes a great Christmas present for all the family. We have museum just like Eureka where we live and it's great for letting the older children have a bit of freedom to move around doing their own discoveries whilst staying with the younger ones - our children are aged 3 to 12 and the they love the Belgian equivalent of Eureka.

Alternatively, try and find an activity you can all do such as swimming. Once all the children are used to goin out and doing something fun together, it should be easier to do mundane things like shopping - mind you I try to do most of the mundane things like shopping whilst the elder children are at school.

nearlyrich

My mum must have had this problem as we ranged over 13 years oldest to youngest, we didn't go out as a family much as we didn't have a car so whenever we went anywhere it was different and we didn't get bored. I think it's harder today because children are more used to being entertained by TV or computer games or doing some activity and the simple things don't make them as happy as they made us a few years ago.

Savvy_Sue

blottedcopybook wrote: »

I struggle with taking mine out too, the babies are quite happy doing anything but my seven year old is a right mardybum just now and nothing is good enough for him. It puts me off taking them anywhere because he just whines about how bored he is/how rubbish it is/how much more fun he has at his dads/grannys etc.

If you find a solution, sling it my way!

"Yup, this IS boring / rubbish listening to you whining on about how bored you are / how rubbish this is, so would you please be quiet and stop spoiling it for the rest of us, otherwise next time YOU want to do something the answer will be no."

can you tell I have the t-shirt? :rotfl:

In fairness, we did discover later that DS1 has mild Asperger's, so he does struggle to take an interest in things he's not interested in, IYSWIM, but he DID spoil many trips out for his brothers, and nearly drove me to distraction. And I remember feeling guilty one day when he was out for the day, don't remember where, and we took the younger two on a steam train. We had a lovely time, and I KNEW it was better because DS1 wasn't with us, moaning!

Things that kept me sane, just:

• insisting that DS1 took a book everywhere with him so that he could if necessary sit in a corner and read. DS2 then copied this habit.
• picking up a comic for each of them at the START of the voyage round the supermarket. DS1 and DS2 would sit at the end of each aisle reading, while DS3 tagged along and 'helped' with the shopping.
• warning DS1 in advance that it didn't matter whether he was going to enjoy this trip or not, it was happening, and he was not to moan and spoil it. This worked better as he got older.
• realising and teaching them that life is tough, life is inherently unfair, and it's our job as parents to teach them to cope with this rather than make sure they always get what they want.

I should probably slink off to the Bad Mother's Club at this point ... I lost a battle earlier today over taking DS3 (16) to buy new shoes - I wanted to do it today, he wants to leave it a week or two, and he doesn't care if his shoes fall completely to bits before we go. The pair with the soles flapping at the toes are NOT unsafe, according to him. :mad:

chmmy

I also do as much internet shopping as I can and try to find times when I can just take 1 or 2 of them shoe/clothes shopping by themselves. My nearly 15 year old hardly ever wants to come out with us any more, probably traumatised from it all lol. So I dont have any answers! (apart from having a few biscuits and crisps to distract them)

miserly_mum

As the mum of 6 kids ranging from 20 to 2 (almost 3) years i know exactly how you all feel.

Pre internet days I tried to do all shopping while they were either at school or my Mum or Hubby(at the time) could look after them. I can still remember how much I hated being dragged round shops with my Mum and ddn't want to inflict that on my brood

Now I do 95% of shopping online.It keeps my stress levels down and means our weekends are spent doing family stuff and not spent trailing around shopping centers with bored moaning kids.

We only have the 3 younger boys(11,8 and 2)to entertain plus DGD(18 months) now and again. It's difficult finding one activity that will appeal to them all because of the big age gap. Swimming is a good combined activity.

Summer is easier as the beach appeals to everyone. Cinema trips are difficult and a lot of the time we do split days out. We'll take the little ones to something while the older 2 stay at home with their older sister and vice versa.

Or i'll take the wee ones to say an indoor soft play area and OH will take the boys to the cinema or football or whatever.

I had the same problem a few years ago with my oldest 3 and the younger 2 (before I had my youngest son). i had to split activities a lot of the time then too. Untill the older ones got to the stage they could go places on their own with friends etc. and were embarrassed to be seen out with "the Parents" anyway lol

izoomzoom

DS1 9, DS2 7 and DD 1 (today)

Prior to DS1's bike being stolen about a month ago, we often just use to go around the neighbourhood, them on their bikes, and me pushing DD. Even a trip to town was okay, because they were able to go ahead until the road, then we all crossed together. We mostly end up going to the park, and DD and I go the short route, and they go the longer route through the park, to meet up with the playground equipment.

I think eventually you do have to split up, because of the huge age gap. DH do one age group and you do the other. Hopefully they'll appreciate the more individual attention more :rolleyes: .

Oldernotwiser

You don't mention a partner but if you have one, why not separate into 2 groups and alternate taking the older/younger ones?