I want to bash him repeatedly with a frying pan.....selfish OH

lauren_1

Glad i got that off my chest but didn't get it, after all that.

pinkshoes

I think you should go ahead and bash him on the head with a frying pan! We're in middle of an economic crisis, and he should be grateful that you're going to be bringing in good money to help pay for nice things.

It's not about him any more, it's about the family.

How long until you can decide about the job? Could you make severe cut backs (no more meat with meals for OH!) which would equal the extra amount you'll earn, and tell OH you need the money, so if you can't earn it with this new job, you'l just have to make cutbacks instead.

Newtonlot

I'd bash him with the frying pan.
I take it he was there when the children were made, so he should be there now for them as well. It takes 2 to make a child and should therefore accept his responsibilities.
In this modern world that means not only helping to provide for their welfare but also in their upbringing.
My DH works 5 full days with about 2 hours travelling a day. I no longer work due to redundancy. He gets up during the night for the 1 year old at least twice a week. He helps me get the girls ready in the morning so I can get the eldest to nursery on time. He helps me feed them at teatime if he manages to get in on time. And he helps bath them. The weekends we spend as a family and we both care for the children.
I think you are getting a raw deal and have the right to clatter him.
Sorry not been able to offer any practical advice.

liney

Make sure its one of those wrought iron frying pans, won't you.

Completely unreasonable. Perhaps you might suggest that your mother is feeling the pressure of looking after his children for 2 nights a week because he can't be bothered, so how much overtime will he be able to get if you have to quit working.....? Whilst smiling sweetly, naturally.

lauren_1

Financialy we are ok, just keeping our heads above water.

But i like having my own money, I would like to see more of it!
£400-500 a month extra could make such a difference, at the moment ctc, wages and cb go in and bills go straight out, after food (drastically reduced thanks to the OS gang) i have £10 a week left.

I just want to be able to go to dd 'sod it, put the stupidly over priced HSM branded carp back in the trolley' have a treat or take ds to tumble tots or a activity place once a week, hey i might even save some!

DKLS

He needs retraining sharpish, never mind the frying pan, something short and pointy would be more effective.

Withdraw privileges at once

skylight

I can loan you the cast-iron frying pan too.... Just let me wipe the blood off first.

Horace

DKLS wrote: »

He needs retraining sharpish, never mind the frying pan, something short and pointy would be more effective.

Withdraw privileges at once

Hear hear.

It takes two to make kids and therefore he has a responsibility for their care - withdraw all priveleges in the bedroom department too. Also, can't your mother think of an excuse as to why she can't have the kids - eg. she has a bridge night or something, or during the daytime she is volunteering somewhere that way he will be forced too look after his own kids?

If he is lazing about at home then I would expect him to at least clean the place and cook dinner so that its on the table when you get home.

You could always put an ad on freecycle - Offer, one useless, pigheaded, lazy husband - useless with kids, can't cook or clean, loves lazing in the chair so would make a good ornament

Ivrytwr3

'i pay the rent' 'i make the rules'

you have the boobs and they don't come out to play anymore until he pulls his weight.

*Louise*

'nother vote for the frying pan here! What a selfish ****

His kids, his responsibility to help look after them. If my OH refused to look after HIS kids while I went to work (not as if you're out gallivanting!) then he would find himself single. Why should you have to take on the whole workload yourself? I'm guessing you do all the housework as well?

As for the 'I pay the rent I make the rules' well that would just make me see RED.:mad: Maybe you should take over the rent and leave the rest of the bills to him.

A couple should have a partnership, not a fricking dictatorship.

RedBern

You could always put an ad on freecycle - Offer, one useless, pigheaded, lazy husband - useless with kids, can't cook or clean, loves lazing in the chair so would make a good ornament

yeah - but who the hell would want him - perhaps you should point that out.

On a more serious note - I'm with the frying pan gang on this;)

You say he only pays the rent - well then, when he sits down for his tea say, 'me and the kids have already eaten at mums' and leave him with an empty fridge - hey you pay the bills - you make the rules!!:rolleyes: