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In Debt At The Age of 19

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  • 2bFrank
    2bFrank Posts: 363 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture 100 Posts Combo Breaker
    Just been reading this thread and it all seems so familiar. After viewing all the posts and great advice I would like to add my two pennies worth (not as if I have two pennies spare, I wish I just had a penny)

    From what I can see, it seems the root of your problem is not money management as such (however that has not helped) it’s your so called friends. Be all and end all these people are the root to why you’re in debt. May it be you buying new mobile phones to keep up with them staying cool or its them taking money of you, you cannot buy friends fella. On a Saturday when you pay them £50 to stay overnight do they return the favour by paying you to stay at there house, or on that note do you ever stay at there house. How do you even come to this agreement, do you ring them and ask them to stay over offering the £50 as initiative, or do they come round ,stay the night and bill you in the morning

    These people, do they honestly make you happy when you are around them, do they make you feel good? when you are down after a crap day at work or having girl trouble, do these friends go out there way to take you to the pub, buy you a few pints and make you feel better. Real friends offer you there time, advice, loyalty and attention unconditionally, with no expectation of a reward, only that you will offer you time, advice, loyalty and attention when they need it.

    It sounds to me you really need to listen to your mum, there is no shame in it, I live by my mums advice, even at my age, if anything I am unsure of I run it through my mum, she soon puts me right,. Tell your mum that you pay for your friends company and see what she will say. These ‘friends’ are foes (scum, leeches…..etc, I could go on all day) Get rid of them, you don’t need them, you may be lonely for a short while, but this will encourage you to make new friends and these friends will offer you the respect you deserve and not expect your money and freebies.

    When you have sorted your social part of your life I am sure that the money side will fit into place, you can attack your debts will most of your disposable income, and if you work at it, this time next year you will not have to worry about were they money is coming from for presents (instead you will be worrying about what to buy them). And whatever you do don’t get a consolidated loan, because while it will free up some money every month, with the friend s you have, it will just go back on them and you will be in a bigger mess next year, which I can assure you.

    Well that is my rant, and sorry if it seems too harsh, but to be honest if you had a true friend, they would have told you this along time ago.
  • Hiya David and hello to everyone else reading this. And thanks for your lovely message Justicia!

    With regards to a consolidation loan, I do agree with inmypocketnottheirs and tigger115 about the risk of higher interest and also the risk of getting into more debt after consolidating. There's no denying that! And I understand why they urge you not to follow this route, because from their experience it hasn’t worked.

    However, from my experience it is working, but only because I have stopped debting (ie, stopped spending borrowed money). I think anyone who feels they are on top of their debt reaches a point where something clicks inside of them and they realise they need to stop debting in order to get out of debt. That happened for me recently when I got my second consolidation loan and that’s why this one is working for me now.

    At the end of the day, it’s about manageability. Some people feel able to manage their various debts one by one. I tried to do that but unfortunately couldn’t manage it, which is why I’ve got the one loan.

    Here are your options regarding your debt:

    1. Keep your 5 debts, stop debting (ie, spending borrowed money) and pay off each debt one by one, highest interest first.
    2. Keep your 5 debts, keep debting and get into more debt.
    3. Get a consolidation loan, stop debting and pay off that one debt.
    4. Get a consolidation loan, keep debting and get into more debt.

    I have experienced 2, 3 and 4 of these! Really 1 and 3 are the ideals and what we want to achieve. Both 1 and 3 have their pros and cons which are:

    Paying 5 debts off one by one

    Pro: Total debt figure of these 5 debts (including all interest) may possibly be lower than if you get a consolidation loan
    Con: Harder to manage, needs a steady and logical repayment plan

    Paying off one debt

    Pro: Easy to manage, one payment every month
    Con: The total debt figure may be more than if you’d paid 5 debts off

    So you have to weigh these things up and see what suits you best. And the best place to start is to work out how much your total debt is right now, including all the interest. That will give you a true figure to work with and move forward with.

    Regarding your loan applications, if you want to continue down this route then I’m afraid you need to stop applying for loans for the next 6 months and try again June/July 2006. If you carried on applying for loans, then you won’t be accepted because they can see that you keep getting turned down by other lenders and will just follow suit. You need to let the records clear for the next 6 months by not applying for anything.

    As for me, I have a poor credit score, due to little or no credit history (so it’s like I don’t exist!), so I’ve been refused every loan I’ve applied for. In the end after much frustration (and overcoming feelings of invisibility!), I asked my bank and got my loan. Admittedly it is higher interest and is not ideal, but I calculated that the total debt figure is roughly the same as if I’d kept my 2 debts, which are also high interest with my bank.

    Needless to say, it has been a steep learning curve for me over the last 3 years. I didn’t know anything about interest rates, the electoral roll, credit scoring etc but now I do! We live and learn heh! But as you can see, my debt is going down, so it’s working all tickety boo.

    Also, as everyone has been saying previously, at the same time as trying to figure out how to pay off your debt, it’s really important to become aware of your spending habits and try to curb them. This is an ongoing challenge! But a challenge in the good, exciting sense of the word. I hope you start your budget sheet if you haven’t done so already and use it as a tool to help you manage your money every month, for the rest of your days.

    Here are some key words for paying off debt: determination, intelligence, commitment, faith, vision and PATIENCE.

    I wish you lots of happiness, courage and dreams come true!

    x Butterfly x
  • This is to help anyone who is feeling desperate at this time of year in spirralling debt(see list at bottom to skip a long boring tail) I am 25 and just come out of a (whisper) gay relationship
    I stupidly helped my partner with a new satellite telly playout business who's clients never paid their bills, they were Nigerian.

    I have run up credit card debts of approx £29,000. This has been the case for a year now. I have a mortgage of 218,000 for which i pay £1400 pcm. My partner took the funds on a second mortgage of £18,000 to clear some of their debts. I have been finding those repayments of £300 pcm for a year now to stop re-posssesion. Before it all went wrong I invested in an off plan property abroad using unsecured loans (cos thats what those pieces of plastic are)of £30,000 on 0% offers (see below)
    Obviously those came to an end a long time ago.

    My partner got a car on credit when we moved in too dumb to realsie he could never pay for both and I had to pay the bailiffs not to take it away on one occasion, it was then hidden from the creditors by my ex whilst we split up. My partner was never able to pay towards our mortgage and I have received court papers placing an order for £30,000 on their share of the property should it be sold. I have registered a block on it and informed the court and loan company of the last location of the vehicle (had enough of that car id actually like to push it off beachy head). They havent told me of any update yet.

    I rent out our home for £850 pcm and have my post re-directed to my parents. I have taken my ex-partners belongings and put them in storage until they pay back over £10,000 I am owed in personal debt. I have to write off the other £ 5000 invested in the business They have also been convicted of ABH for an assault on me before we split. One day I hope i can proof that I have made all the mortgage payments and it will be mine. Their debt to me can be cleared from their initial deposit and money spent on flooring, decorating etc. My ex has also pressurised me to ignore the mortgages and let the home be re-possessed.

    I haven't been able to pay the minimum payments on the unsecured cards or the loans and have been advised by the CCCS to go bankrupt. I cannot do this because I am waiting for the overseas property to be completed which I would have to declare or risk being imprisoned for fraud.

    I have opened a cash only account in preperation for bankruptcy but since nothing has happened in the last twelve months i have started using my Switch card account that is in an arranged overdraft. I now put main income in the cash only to clear all bills and debt repaymnets and I use the other for remaining wages and just for going out, petrol,food etc.

    I get the re-directd mail asking for payment, even offering 75% settlement on both cards and loans. I have set up standing orders with all of them for £5 a month, they continue to threaten me with visits to my home but my tennants don't answer the door to me let alone a random person asking for me. They have threatened to enforce deduction of my wages with my employer but I am a sole trader for several companies ( how I got such amazing credit as self employed with no proof of regular income is laughable)

    Forgive me but this has been going on so long now I can't get upset about it, I can't see any way out of the debt but there comes a point where you just have to smile and get on with life. I won't be going to jail so what else is there to worry for?

    I am in a shared house with no mail to open and have an income of £4000 per month, £3000 of which goes on my secured debt.

    I know some of this is my own fault but I was with a successful person who trusted in their clients to adhere to the contract they were bound by. It is a dominoes effect that makes the world go round.

    I continue to have hilarious converstations with my creditors who get quite aggressive when I don't play ball, particulary MBNA but they know they shouldn't have just given me so much money with no proof of income, which at the time was a third of what i earn now. I tell them to make me bankrupt and take the court action they keep promising but they never do. They keep calling with a new offer of settlement but I decline and say I'm happy to pay a fiver a month until I drop. They talk about honour and I tell them they work for MBNA, then they put the phone down. I have never lost sleep and continue to go out and party like any 25 year old. My creditors don't know of each other and that's the way i hope it stays. I feel very sorry for the families of those who have taken there lives over lesser problems than mine, it is not worth it. They want you to be in debt to them it is their purpose in life.

    I hear so much talk of bad credit as if it is the worst thing ever, I don't need to borrow again and I wouldn't want to. My parents are of the generation where you only buy what you can afford but they understand my circumstances are slightly different. They know the overseas property can be sold and one day I'll move in to the apartment I rent out or maybe continue to take income from it. I wouldn't say I have no regrets but I would do most of it all over again, just without being so generous with other peoples money.

    I have ccj's too from an unscrupulous solicitor but nothing has ever come of them, like bad credit who cares?

    By the way the loan offers are still coming through thick and fast, they ask for it they really do.

    In a nutshell these are my debts, have a good christmas

    mbna £7500
    marbles £5000
    cahoot £4500
    citi £4500
    egg £3800
    all/mbna £4000
    natwest £6500

    loans

    egg £ 22000
    cahoot £ 7000

    mortgage

    1 £ 215,000
    2 £ 15,000
  • Kevicho
    Kevicho Posts: 3,216 Forumite
    paulw wrote:
    This is to help anyone who is feeling desperate at this time of year in spirralling debt(see list at bottom to skip a long boring tail) I am 25 and just come out of a (whisper) gay relationship
    I stupidly helped my partner with a new satellite telly playout business who's clients never paid their bills, they were Nigerian.

    These nigerian people sound like scammers, is there a way you can claim back insurance, if you paid for all this on your CC you may be able to get the cc company to pay this back

    Would be worth looking into (TBH i dont know the legal aspects of this but im sure your credit cards give fraud protection - i may be wrong)
  • Ghost
    Ghost Posts: 313 Forumite
    Hi dcampbell86,

    I have read this thread with interest and, I'm sure you'll agree, some truly great advice has been offered.

    Regarding your friends, I find your situation of "paying friends £50 to stay over on Saturday nights", quite frankly, disturbing. I think there is much more going on here than just financial issues, and by not coming to terms with these other issues (whatever they may be) you could possibly jeopardise your financial recovery.

    In the meantime, what's one thing that you could do to give yourself more peace financially?
    "He who asks questions cannot avoid the answers"
  • Hi dcampbell86

    I can completly relate to some of what your going through. I myself realised at 19 that i need to get out of debt.

    Right now I'm gradually pulling myself out of my overdraft but i have two credit cards to pay off also, I guess my debt rounds up to around £2500.

    I find it astounding about your friends. And i do suggest you should take more time to yourself to look at what is actually going wrong.

    The credit cards. I've recently got a new card so that i can do balance transfers to a lifetime fixed rate card so that i can pay off both credit cards as a hole off each month, also with a lower rate means i can pay off a lot more than the minimum. I think maybe that may a good idea but some may disagree because it could lead to more temptation. I suggest if you do do that then you cancel your other cards, or hand them over to your mum to cut up.

    I've just finished the other contract i had, it must be a teenage thing to do and have more than one mobile lol. I think you should just get a pay as you go sim card and just give all the other sims to your mum and lower the contracts to there lowest you can, on orange i was able to lower it to £15 a month.

    Being 19 i know that you can't avoid having a social life but don't pay friends to come round, that is just beyond silly. In your budget "if possible" leave a set amount of money for at most 1 night a week and arrange these nights out the week before so you can't be distracted to do anything else. When you go out take that amount of money out with you and leave you card/s at home, tell all your friends that you CANNOT borrow money from them and when you've run out, thats it you go home. Believe me it works.

    I don't really know what other advice to offer you, just take a good look at everything and don't let bad days get the better of you, thats sometimes my weakness, bad days = spending money. Don't let it happen.

    Good luck
    Debt Free - Go Me :o
  • cal
    cal Posts: 24 Forumite
    If you can proof to your Mum that you are serious about sorting out your life, maybe she would be prepared to move some of the debt to an interest free credit card. My Mum did this for my nephew when he got into trouble, she had him set up a standing order into her account for the monthly payment. As the card was in her name she was able to get a large enough sum, he owed £1000, but was only 17. Reducing the interest will help you pay the debt off quicker. It is likely that your Mum could get around £3000 on an interest free card. But she will need to be able to trust you to pay it back.
  • cal wrote:
    If you can proof to your Mum that you are serious about sorting out your life, maybe she would be prepared to move some of the debt to an interest free credit card. My Mum did this for my nephew when he got into trouble, she had him set up a standing order into her account for the monthly payment. As the card was in her name she was able to get a large enough sum, he owed £1000, but was only 17. Reducing the interest will help you pay the debt off quicker. It is likely that your Mum could get around £3000 on an interest free card. But she will need to be able to trust you to pay it back.


    Good suggestion. If you will keep your word and pay your mum that is.
    Don't lie, thieve, cheat or steal. The Government do not like the competition.
    The Lord Giveth and the Government Taketh Away.
    I'm sorry, I don't apologise. That's just the way I am. Homer (Simpson)
  • Ghost wrote:
    Hi dcampbell86,

    I have read this thread with interest and, I'm sure you'll agree, some truly great advice has been offered.

    Regarding your friends, I find your situation of "paying friends £50 to stay over on Saturday nights", quite frankly, disturbing. I think there is much more going on here than just financial issues, and by not coming to terms with these other issues (whatever they may be) you could possibly jeopardise your financial recovery.

    In the meantime, what's one thing that you could do to give yourself more peace financially?


    Ghost,

    What is the one thing I could do to give myself more peace financially?
  • Haushinka wrote:
    The credit cards. I've recently got a new card so that i can do balance transfers to a lifetime fixed rate card so that i can pay off both credit cards as a hole off each month, also with a lower rate means i can pay off a lot more than the minimum.

    What is the CC company you went to?
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