How much for rent?

SecretSquirrel88

Hello everyone,

Im a newbie here, after hearing so much about the site I had to join!

Myself (19) and my partner (26) have been together for just over 2.5 years and living together for 2 years. Reality has now hit us and we cannot afford to rent anywhere privatly anymore due to OH's debts of £5,500, to cover these debts he pays out £450 which leaves us with next to nothing (even with my wages aswell!)

I would like to move back home with my partner, whereas he would like us both to move back to his parents. We cannot decide and therefore always end up falling out about it and continue to struggle for another month - well enough is enough now, im really fed up with it.

My parents house is 15 mins from work, and about 5 minutes to all our friends, the gym we go to everynight, the shops etc etc

His parents house is 35 mins from work, and about 10 minutes from a little shop. It basically in the middle of nowhere.

We also have 2 guinue pigs and there wouldnt be any room for them at OH parents, but there is at my parents house. My OH has 'issues' about me and my parents (he thinks that Im not letting them go! Bearing in mind I moved out with him when I was 17!) which is why its so hard to convince him.

My parents have said to me that they will want rent, however they have not said how much so I wondered what you guys thought?

How much would you charge for 2 people?

We ourselves would still be buying our own food (and cooking it), doing our own washing (buying the products aswell)


Thanks in advance
Squirrel

belfastgirl23

I think how much to pay is the least of your worries to be honest.

If your partner doesn't want to live with your parents, you do realise what it would be like if they were all living there together? Tension all the time, possibly arguments or even worse silence and you stuck in the middle...of course if he thinks they hold too much sway over you then he will be wanting for you to always side with him if there are disagreements. Are you prepared to do that?

And if your parents are asking for rent then quite possibly they don't particularly want him living there in any case but feel obliged to offer because of you. (although it is possible they need the money too, in which case ignore)

Personally I guess I'm concerned you are putting your own needs and preferences above those of both your partner and possibly your parents. You need to have a rethink.

If his parents house is as bad as you say, could you not both go back to your respective parents and live there as cheap as they will let you until the debt is paid, then find a place together again.

Dill

Hi Squirrel

If your OH's debt payments are so much that you're both struggling to pay the rent it might be worth hopping over to the debt-free-wannabe board. There's some really good advice there. They might suggest you contact one of the debt charities, for example?

I'm just thinking that this might be a better option for you, as you've been used to having your independence for a while now, so moving in with your or your OH's parents might come as a bit of a shock to the system and also put a strain on the relationship (?)

But to answer your question about how much rent, I'd say it depends on what the ground rules are and how much space you'd have.. maybe £300 a month,say? Only a guess!

SecretSquirrel88

belfastgirl23 wrote: »

I think how much to pay is the least of your worries to be honest.

If your partner doesn't want to live with your parents, you do realise what it would be like if they were all living there together? Tension all the time, possibly arguments or even worse silence and you stuck in the middle...of course if he thinks they hold too much sway over you then he will be wanting for you to always side with him if there are disagreements. Are you prepared to do that?

And if your parents are asking for rent then quite possibly they don't particularly want him living there in any case but feel obliged to offer because of you. (although it is possible they need the money too, in which case ignore)

Personally I guess I'm concerned you are putting your own needs and preferences above those of both your partner and possibly your parents. You need to have a rethink.

If his parents house is as bad as you say, could you not both go back to your respective parents and live there as cheap as they will let you until the debt is paid, then find a place together again.

We used to live with them, so I'm not worried about them falling out, they never have, my partner just forgets that Im younger than he is. My parents don't need the money no, but even I think its unfair to keep us for nothing! It's not that they dont want him there at all, OK so there not happy with the situation of him owing money as it stresses me out but its nothing serious. Anyone would be the same. I dont see how I am putting my needs first before my partner and parents? My parents asked me if we waned to move back home and I thought it was a good idea as it would be giving my partner more money a month to play with and get his debts out the way, plus its closer to worka dn town - meaning less fuel. My parents have said that they would charge us both rent but I could have mine back. Living apart is not an option. I would live at his parents house, I just think its more ideal and my parents.

SecretSquirrel88

Dill wrote: »

Hi Squirrel

If your OH's debt payments are so much that you're both struggling to pay the rent it might be worth hopping over to the debt-free-wannabe board. There's some really good advice there. They might suggest you contact one of the debt charities, for example?

I'm just thinking that this might be a better option for you, as you've been used to having your independence for a while now, so moving in with your or your OH's parents might come as a bit of a shock to the system and also put a strain on the relationship (?)

But to answer your question about how much rent, I'd say it depends on what the ground rules are and how much space you'd have.. maybe £300 a month,say? Only a guess!

Yes I agree about that, we are used to our own space so it def will be a shock but I cannot see another way.

If we were at my parents place, we would have my old bedroom, which is a double with an en-suite, and use of the kitchen and lounge (not that we would use the lounge)

If we were at OH parents place, we would have his old bedroom, which is a double and use of the family bathroom, use of the kitchen and Lounge - we would be in the lounge alot there as with living in the middle of nowhere there would be nothing else to do (lol) and there is already 5 of them and a big dog. Another of my problems is that they smoke and whenever I leave there my clothes stink, Im not trying to sound 'snobby' and I know its just little things but it all adds up.

I think £150 each would be quite fair. thanks

ginvzt

You don't need to be close to town if you are trying to save - the petrol to work will be far less than the drinks and evenings out in the town! Remove the temptation from the equation!

SecretSquirrel88

ginvzt: We dont drink. Its closer to the shops, closer to our friends. As as mentioned - will be so much cheaper on fuel

ginvzt

I don't drink either. I will have a glass of juice in the pub when we go out with OH, and then you are shocked, when you realise that juice costs nearly the same if not more than the beer...

Staciep88

£250? £300?

SecretSquirrel88

ginvzt wrote: »

I don't drink either. I will have a glass of juice in the pub when we go out with OH, and then you are shocked, when you realise that juice costs nearly the same if not more than the beer...

Because we dont drink, we dont go out to pubs, unless its christmas - its not our thing. if we see our friends its at the beach or at there house etc, but we do not go out and spend money

Dill

I just wanted to say I don't know your situation of course, but the debtors can't take money that you need for your rent and essential living costs. The CAB might be able to negotiate with the companies you owe money to, and help you to come up with an affordable way of paying off what's owed.

Anyway, good luck whatever you decide.