The Diary of a reformed Ostrich! (no more head in the sand!)

sarriep

Hi petrafyde,
If you check your credit file you can see who says you owe them and what. We registered with credit expert and got a month free (but cancel quickly!). It had the status of all (or most) debts for the last few years and may help you to start sorting out who you owe what.
I agree about the car insurance - if you haven't used the car tell them you didn't need it. I would have thought they would cancel your policy instead of hassling you now?
It will get better once you have a plan and can see an end! This forum is fab and has really changed my life! Really!
Best Wishes,
Sx

milliemonster

Hiya hun, firstly well done for finding us on here! and I am so sorry about your son, I cannot even begin to imagine how you cope with something like that.

The problem you have really is that it all just spirals and spirals doesn't it and you end up then not knowing where to start. But believe me, once you get everything written down (and it IS scary to do it), yes you'll be horrified and cry and wonder what on earth you are going to do to get out of it but then, and this is the best part, you take stock and just being able to put an actual figure on the extent of your debt helps so much, because from there onwards it can only get better.

I suggest initially you get hold of your credit report from Experian and Equifax, this will detail all the debts you owe and who to, when you last paid etc and will be a start in helping you get your head around this.

Then you need to look at the debts you haven't acknowledged or paid in anyway in the last 6 years, this is important because these debts will be statute barred, this simply means the creditor can no longer chase you for the debt.

then we can take it from there

halight

Well done for taking control:j :j

Iv been there were i have not opend letters and hid them out of site.

Keep up the good hard work of taking and stying in control:T

I wish you loads of luck with sorting it all out
STAY STRONG AND STAY IN CONTROL

petrafyde

MrsTine wrote: »

Sorry i can't spell meant statute barred

From debtquestions.co.uk - as you say they have chased you regularly then your debts do not come under this unfortunately.

Thank you for that. Seems like a mini-minefield doesn't it

So, the money is classed as still owed on those debts, even though the creditor cannot legally chase to recover them -- so basically it is still a flaw on my credit file but the only way I have to pay it is if I choose to?

I'm working through the SOA now, and I'll post the details when its done. It's been a long time since I've faced up to this so it's gonna take a while I think.

petrafyde

sarriep, milliemonster and halight.

Thanks a lot for the support, it really means a lot.

I'd thought about getting my credit file, but I'm really frightened (big baby!) I'm going to do the SOA and see if I can get enough gumption to register with them online later, money is very tight this month so my primary goal is to just work out exactly what we have and start budgeting with food and normal daily things. I feel such an idiot, but stronger than I was yesterday even though I do want to start crying at the moment. I actually woke up this morning not dreading getting up, so its getting a bit better already I think. Just crossing my fingers it continues to improve now

petrafyde

Hi again,

Sorry to keep bothering, shall I leave out things like haircuts etc and concentrate on the important bills, or do I put everything down? My spending has been irregular to say the least so there is no rhyme or reason to when certain things have been paid for, etc. I would imagine there would be a lot missing?

Also, I'm wanting to clear both our debts so I'm okay to put in his too aren't I?

Thanks.

MrsTinks

petrafyde wrote: »

Thank you for that. Seems like a mini-minefield doesn't it

So, the money is classed as still owed on those debts, even though the creditor cannot legally chase to recover them -- so basically it is still a flaw on my credit file but the only way I have to pay it is if I choose to?

I'm working through the SOA now, and I'll post the details when its done. It's been a long time since I've faced up to this so it's gonna take a while I think.

No - because they continued to chase you and did not cease chasing you for 6 years at any point then this does NOT apply - that is what I posted the point is that you might as well understand that now as someone will undoubtably mention it later Whilst people usually ask when the last time you paid the debt was that is infact technically incorrect as if the creditor has taken all reasonable steps to try and get you to pay by sending you reminders etc then although you have not paid the account will NOT be statute barred. It's a very fine line

IF any debt was statute barred then yes basically you would still owe it but the creditor could not legally hound you for the money... There are exceptions but let's not go there now

petrafyde

Thanks, I did mean the ones which hadn't contacted me -- sorry I didn't make that clear!

The goal is to pay everything ultimately, but my credit file has to come last in terms of importance, so anything which has waited six years without contact will not get priority is what I'm thinking.

MrsTinks

petrafyde wrote: »

Hi again,

Sorry to keep bothering, shall I leave out things like haircuts etc and concentrate on the important bills, or do I put everything down? My spending has been irregular to say the least so there is no rhyme or reason to when certain things have been paid for, etc. I would imagine there would be a lot missing?

Also, I'm wanting to clear both our debts so I'm okay to put in his too aren't I?

Thanks.

Everything - once it's down on paper then we start structuring it and showing you where you can cut back and why and how etc -
You might also find that starting a spending diary will help you work out where money goes - we all know that the laws of finance dictates that we never have as much money in the bank/wallet as you were certain we ought to have Having a running total will show you where it goes and how much is tat or unneccesary

saucymare

Just thought I would say welcome to the forum. I use to hide all my letter's thinking if I never opened them they would not exist, You have made the first step, Things will get better.