Have you told your family about your debt?

Miss_Piggy_2

Thanks to all who've replied.

I guess I'm ashamed I've got myself into this situation but ultimately I know my Mum and Dad would be supportive. I just don't want them thinking I'm a failure. I guss though that they would be proud that I'm dealing with it.
Everyones different though so I can see why some keep it to themselves.

I think I will probably tell them once I've nearly sorted it / paid my debts. I don't want them to worry, especially with my Dad coming up to retirement age.

Thanks again for letting me have the benfit of your experiences.

JES_F1

I've not told anyone about the extent of my debts nor about being on my DMP with the CCCS. However, I have told friends and family that I'm cutting back, doing lots of bargain hunting, etc.

Friends have loved it when I've suggested places to eat with vouchers got from here. We went to Pizza Express and Zizzi's - and had great evenings out without spending a fortune.

Ames

I've told my family a few times, but they always 'forget'. They seem to think that as I'm on disability benefits I've got loads of spare cash - my dad and sister invited me to go on holiday with them but I didn't have £1500 (that's not a typo) for it. They know my debts were serious enough to be told by CAB to go bankrupt, but it doesn't seem to compute into it meaning I haven't got much money.

Miss_Piggy_2

Ames wrote: »

I've told my family a few times, but they always 'forget'. They seem to think that as I'm on disability benefits I've got loads of spare cash - my dad and sister invited me to go on holiday with them but I didn't have £1500 (that's not a typo) for it. They know my debts were serious enough to be told by CAB to go bankrupt, but it doesn't seem to compute into it meaning I haven't got much money.

I know where you're coming from. My mates want o go out for a meal every month which usually ends up costing about £50 a head. They were slightly incredulous when I said I would have to bow out as I couldn't afford it anymore. People really have NO clue!!!!!

huxley

No they know we have problems but not how many! DH used to earn good money and things were tight but then he was made redundant now is self employed and earning about a third of what he used to and I'm on disability, so they think its more to do with that than debts, if our parents knew they would only worry and we would hate that.

Jacks_xxx

I told family and friends that we were in a serious "lose the house / go bankrupt" sort of situation if we didn't buckle down and sort it out - but only too explain our changes in behaviour really.

I never discussed actual figures though cos I didn't want my dad to have a heart attack over it. The numbers were so big and scary....

The wider family are just fixated on why we haven't got a nicer car???

My main friends "know" but they never think it's relevant to whatever's going on.

Therefore they just think I am a grumpy antisocial b1tch when I say we'll buy our own present rather than put £50 each (£100) into the pot or when I say we can't afford come out for a set meal at £60 a head (so £120 :rolleyes: ) or when I say I can't come on both the hen weekends at £350 a pop etc etc et bl00dy cetera! :rolleyes:

I'm pretty much at the point today where I kind of think "sod 'em!"

I'm facing possibly the biggest crisis of my life and clearly they're not listening to me, so I've sort of given up trying to explain.

My bestest friend is amazing but lives a long way away from me. She knows the whole dealio cos we always just blurt out whatever's going on with us to each other. I am very lucky to have her.

She bought me a fridge magnet which says "I'll always be your friend...you KNOW too much!"

Love Jacks xxx

Glittermonkey

Reading through the rest of this thread got me thinking as to why I've never really mentioned it to my parents.

My parents have never had credit in their life, everything they have has been paid for in cash. Neither of them are well off but they were never extravagant and just saved until they wanted something.

They had a mortgage but by down-sizing, moving at the right times etc they have managed to pay it off so are MF now.

Only recently my dad got a debit card and it took a few years for my mum to understand that debit cards are different to credit cards!

I think this makes it extra hard for me to tell them as I don't feel they'd understand. My eldest brother is very sensible with his money, the middle one is useless and has blown a small fortune over the years but doesn't owe money, but also doesn't have a home or anything to show for the 50k he has spent in the last 3-4 years!! The youngest one I am trying to teach not to end up like me!

Naomim

DH and I haven't told family. They know we are cutting back and trying to save for things, they know I put money by each month to cover petrol, car repairs, Christmas and so on but they don't know how much we owe to our credit cards or really that we are in debt. My best friend's and brother know, best friend was on a dmp with payplan a few years ago and one is on one now so they both understand where I am. My brother just keeps buying me things which is what I don't need but he is supportive. :rolleyes:

Naomi x

Glittermonkey

My brother just keeps buying me things which is what I don't need but he is supportive.

My eldest brother done this to me. He gave me his car when he got a new one and gave me his cooker when he moved.

I felt so bad recently when sil and I went out and I had to charge her for her ticket. I felt like I should of given it to her for free after all the stuff they have given me but I just couldn't afford to.

I try and make it up by babysitting for them when I can as they like to go out for dinner a lot.

Buffythedebtslayer

dear God no, no way no chance.

I 'd never be allowed to spend anything again!!

my friends know i am working on getting out of debt but like other people have said it doens't have much impact!

its hard but I will be SO HAPPY when I am out of debt and can tell them ALL exactly how much I paid off!

xxx