Need To Make My Final Decision!

Penny-Pincher!!

Morning

I know what your probably all going to say but need to ask for advice regarding my Stairlift. I have this morning received a letter from my council awarding the full £6900 for the cost of the stairlift and fitting etc by Stannah. I dont have to contribute at all.

Anyways, I still feel that my illness is mainly all in my head and that I will get better in the next few months. I have Lupus, Fybromyalgia, oestioparosis in base of spine and right hip, mental health problems and some other ailments. My OH is now my FT carer and we are both no longer working. I know a stairlift will benefit me ATM as my mobility is limited and am in constant pain and extreme fatigue 24/7. But what happens if I get better and no longer need the stairlift-Im stealing money that could be given to someone worse than me??? I hate this! Accepting this stairlift will also mean me accepting im not well/ill/disabled and dont know if im ready to accept that just yet I feel like a fraud IYKWIM, I know theres people much worse than me, so I should just get on with it.

Im thinking of turning the stairlift down as I dont feel worthy enough to accept it. I dont mean to go on, but dont know who else to talk too. OH is all for it as he helps me all the time, but still doesnt help the way I feel about myself. Ive just turned 31 and feel like if I accept this-its an early grave for me IYKWIM.

Does anyone else who's ill feel the same? Maybe Im just being silly.

Penny-Pincher!!
xxx

Kimberley

I think you should go for it because you may not get another chance to have the Stair lift. What if you turn it down and you don't get better? You have to think of yourself and this lift will help you a lot and give you that extra bit of independency

rchddap1

If you feel that you need it at the moment I would grab the opportunity and get it installed. You may feel like you will get better in the near future, but what happens if you start to feel ill again? Just because you have the stairlift installed it doesn't mean that you have to use it all the time. It will be there for the days that you don't feel up to managing.

You're not a fraud...and taking it does mean that you'll be in your grave in the next couple of years.

skylight

PP - Yes, I think that you are being silly!!

Stairlifts can be removed and re-sold to someone else if you decide that you no longer need it.

And who says someone else would be more derserving than you?
Have you not worked hard?
Have you not brought up your family to the best of your ability?
Are you not trying hard to beat this?
Do you not make people smile with your humour and cheek!?
Do you not help people whenever you can?

And getting a stair lift is not accepting that you are ill.

Its accepting that right here and now, you need a spot of help. If you don't need it in a few years time, then it can be passed on to someone else.


(Thw downside is that if you turn it down and in 6 months regret it, you will probably be shoved to the back of the council list should you reapply)

Take it.

elaine373

Penny-Pincher!! wrote:

Morning

I know what your probably all going to say but need to ask for advice regarding my Stairlift. I have this morning received a letter from my council awarding the full £6900 for the cost of the stairlift and fitting etc by Stannah. I dont have to contribute at all.

Anyways, I still feel that my illness is mainly all in my head and that I will get better in the next few months. I have Lupus, Fybromyalgia, oestioparosis in base of spine and right hip, mental health problems and some other ailments. My OH is now my FT carer and we are both no longer working. I know a stairlift will benefit me ATM as my mobility is limited and am in constant pain and extreme fatigue 24/7. But what happens if I get better and no longer need the stairlift-Im stealing money that could be given to someone worse than me??? I hate this! Accepting this stairlift will also mean me accepting im not well/ill/disabled and dont know if im ready to accept that just yet I feel like a fraud IYKWIM, I know theres people much worse than me, so I should just get on with it.

Im thinking of turning the stairlift down as I dont feel worthy enough to accept it. I dont mean to go on, but dont know who else to talk too. OH is all for it as he helps me all the time, but still doesnt help the way I feel about myself. Ive just turned 31 and feel like if I accept this-its an early grave for me IYKWIM.

Does anyone else who's ill feel the same? Maybe Im just being silly.

Penny-Pincher!!
xxx

Go for it, you must have passed a certain criteria to be awarded this money/stairlift.Dont worry about it, you will only make your illnesses worse by worrying. Hugs, Elaine

Bendybops19

PP go for it!
Ok, you are poorly at the mo, it doesnt mean you will be forever. The stairlift will help you for now, but if you get better in the future, you can get it taken out and given to someone else.
Your not taking the stairlift from anyone else, if other people need one, they will be given one too!! Dont worry about that hun, your not deprving anyone of anything.

anguk

Go for it, you're entitled to it and as you've said you will benefit from it. You don't have to think of yourself as ill or disabled, you just need a little help with some things. My hubby is a leg amputee and has a false leg that he uses to walk, he also has a wheelchair, he hasn't used it in months but we keep it because every now and then he has a bit of bother with his "stump" and needs the wheelchair to get around. He doesn't see it as giving in, it's just needing a little help.

You certainly won't be depriving anyone else, if they need a stairlift they'll also get one. I can understand how upset you must get, I know when OH lost his leg everything changed overnight and he thought his life was over, especially when there were complications afterwards. In time he grew to accept it and adapt, he also realises that things could have been a lot worse.

Take the stairlift, you may find that it helps with your pain and tiredness if you don't have to struggle up & down stairs. You're certainly not heading towards your grave, if anything you're improving your quality of life!

samplerfan

PP.. i dont think this is really about the stairlift as much as it is about acceptance of where you are at with your health... with each new aid/benefit/assesment etc its pushing you mentally towards accepting that..sod it..yes im actually..at this moment in time disabled..and it sucks and i dont want to accept or deal with that label. Could that be it? I know it was for me. I was awarded DLA for life (when they gave life awards) at the age of 32. We had been suffering financially and the award was a relief for our bank balance...but for me.. i sobbed my heart out. There it was..in black and white.. labelled disabled for life. I have faced that whole..argghh..im still bloody disabled..with each new piece of equipment. I'm glad i have all these things to help me..but i still hark after a time when i didnt. Its a kind of bereavement. Be kind to yourself.. but.. be practical.
It sounds like the stairlift is a good thing.. you need it.. your other half probably needs it as well.. the reassurance of it.. and realise that nothing is forever. When and if you no longer need it.. it can be taken away.

pavlovs_dog

PP, im a firm believer that one of the greatest signs of inner strength is not being afraid or too proud to admit that you need help.

i empathise with you, because i've been in a similar situation. i had a very seriuos illness as a child that completely knocked the wind out of my sails. walking more than a few steps left me absolutely exhausted. having to use a wheelchair was such a devasting blow at first - not only did i feel ill, but there was now "hard proof" that there was something "wrong" with me. in the end, it conspired that having the wheelchair only served to make me even more determined to regain my strength and physical fitness.

be honest with yourself. what a difference this stairlift would make to your and your husband's life. more independence and mobility for you, less work for your husband.

its a pity your body is letting you down. my nan is fighting an honourable battle against oestoperosis, determined to stay independently mobile for as long as possible. oesteoperosis is unfortunately just one of her many ailments, but she never grumbles, even on the bad days, she just grateful to still have her faculties (even ifd she does have false teeth )and the love and support of her family. inspirational, dont you think?

no one is going to think any less of you for accepting the stairlift, it wont make you a second class citizen, and its certainatly not a reason for people to expect you to stop fighting your condition. its been offered to you because you need it - dont be too proud to accept the help which could make such a big difference to your life. embrace the opportunity to regain some lost independence and get you life back.

all the best, P_D *hugs*

Bendybops19

You're certainly not heading towards your grave, if anything you're improving your quality of life!

That was really well said anguk

skylight

Whats your thoughts PP?

Made a decsion yet (bearing in mind ours are ALL biased towards a yes!!!!)??