everything will implode now........

learntthehardway_2

What a year I've had as many on here..started my DMP with C.C.C.S.....been managing to pay monthly...then last Jan my OH went off work with depression/bad back, I 've been supporting him and working (overtime aswell) trying to keep things together. I have a son aged 14 and my mother (aged 75) who live with me.......its been a nightmare with my OH so ill...then to top it off he started getting serious mouth ulcers, his company have been great and has been on full pay (now half pay) ....to cut a long story....he has ended up having a MRI scan on his back and last week had biopsy on his toungue ....(ulcers severe wouldn't go away):( his back that bad he couldn't walk........well to top it off I got suspended from work last week ..due to a stupid mistake I made terrible error (not money) I'm a support worker for people with learning disabilities.....I would never have made this mistake if I hadn't been under so much pressure !!.....I haven't slept since being suspended and cant eat..and I know tomorrow my OH results are going to be crap......(my OH says its cancer).....the consultant didn't hold out to much hope aswell........I dont think I can take any more pressure..my life is going to go down the toilet......my OH will be going through treatment and I can see the house being taken away.....I cant afford DMP....way things are going........god I wish I didn't have so many people dependant on me....I feel like I've aged 10 years.......any little thing sets me off crying..and yet most of my life I've been tough.dealing with life's knocks.........but I'm finally beaten..........where do I get the strenth to get through this.........

Burlesque_Babe

ooooh, hugs for you, what an awful load to be bearing.

Please - go and make a cup of tea and come back and we'll take it one step at a time. You're amongst people who can help and support with each problem.

Piquant_2

I can't move on and leave you here having such a terrible time. I don't know what to say or do, but you're not alone, people here will support you through these awful times. Please can you talk to your doctor and get something to help you on a temporary basis.

Piq xx

Deep_In_Debt

Hi Sorry to hear of your tough time - hugs from me.

Can you get back in touch with CCCS? They may suggest you make token payments of £1.00 or whatever, until you can get back on your feet again.

Sorry, can't offer much advice but will offer support.

mummum2

:sad: Truly don't know what to say, but couldn't just leave after reading your post! My heart and prayers go out to you and your family. Hoping that all goes well with OH and your reinstatement at work!

twinklyspecialkag

Make sure you tell your manager at the suspension meeting about the pressures you are under in your private life so they are aware of why the mistake was made. Social care managers should be compassionate!!Good luck.

newlywed

Ring CCCS and ask for a review. I have recently had to decrease my DMP payments due to increasing prices.

Your DMP is not set in stone, the whole point is that it should allow you to live as well as pay your debts.

Please ring them, they are really nice and will understand and are there to help you with your debt.

Burlesque_Babe

ok, let's make a list and everyone can help with each one.

- your current DMP. How about popping your Statement of Affairs up and we can have a look and advise you the way forward, even if it means going down to £1 token payments, then so be it, if that's all you can afford, that's all they can have.

- your mum lives with you. Does this qualify you for any carers allowances at all?

- Your OH's illness. I had a similar problem with my back, I sympathise 100%. Again, have you looked at any benefits you could claim in the short term? Perhaps DLA for him or a carers allowance of some kind for you? For the ulcers and his test results, I will keep everything crossed for you, if you need any support, there will be people at the hospital who can help, or various charities with support networks.

- your job. Sorry about the suspension Are you a member of a union? If so, you need to be speaking to them about the situation and the reasons behind it.

- your own well-being. You can't carry on like this without some help. Please go and see your GP and talk it all through and see how he can help.

HowGreatThouArt

Hi,

Just wanted to say that I am praying for you and your family. Please rest assured that things wil get better. Take some time to think about yourself and have a rest. As others have said talk to your GP. There will be organisations that will help take this burden from you.

God bless, xx

TotallyBrassic

Listen, human beings have an inbuilt ability to keep going through all sorts of hellish situations...you can and will get through this. Re-assess what is really important in terms of what needs your attention first!
Your hubbys health is obv a priority as is looking after your son/mum.

No debt is more imortant than these things.

There is alot of help out there for you, knowing where to look is crucial, you will find so much in here, and lots of people to gainsupport/knowledge from. Keep asking and the answers will come..
Fingers crossed that it isn't too bad tommorrow for your hubby.
Hugs and Prayers
xx

homeaway

learntthehardway wrote: »

What a year I've had as many on here..started my DMP with C.C.C.S.....been managing to pay monthly...then last Jan my OH went off work with depression/bad back, I 've been supporting him and working (overtime aswell) trying to keep things together. I have a son aged 14 and my mother (aged 75) who live with me.......its been a nightmare with my OH so ill...then to top it off he started getting serious mouth ulcers, his company have been great and has been on full pay (now half pay) ....to cut a long story....he has ended up having a MRI scan on his back and last week had biopsy on his toungue ....(ulcers severe wouldn't go away):( his back that bad he couldn't walk........well to top it off I got suspended from work last week ..due to a stupid mistake I made terrible error (not money) I'm a support worker for people with learning disabilities.....I would never have made this mistake if I hadn't been under so much pressure !!.....I haven't slept since being suspended and cant eat..and I know tomorrow my OH results are going to be crap......(my OH says its cancer).....the consultant didn't hold out to much hope aswell........I dont think I can take any more pressure..my life is going to go down the toilet......my OH will be going through treatment and I can see the house being taken away.....I cant afford DMP....way things are going........god I wish I didn't have so many people dependant on me....I feel like I've aged 10 years.......any little thing sets me off crying..and yet most of my life I've been tough.dealing with life's knocks.........but I'm finally beaten..........where do I get the strenth to get through this.........

My heart goes out to you . You will find the strenght to deal with this. If it does turn out to be mouth cancer then it can be treated successfully. I have a good friend whose father had it five years ago and he is still alive and well. You have to try to take each step at a time, you can only deal with what you know. Somebody will be able to point you in the right direction for financial advice and where you can get help. Take care.