scared and worried

44pinkpink

just saying hello really - i don't feel able to give the advice you need - i'll leave that to the more knowledgeable ones here...who have also helped me greatly. i know how good it feels to get a reply when life is feeling !!!!ty. so here i am. just letting you know that i'm thinking of you. have you opened that letter yet? the sun is shining where i am - it always makes my day better - hope it's doing the same for you
x x

CAT_5

Hiya 44pink :-)

Yes, sun is shining here too but quite cold, bet it's nice outside :-)

Yep, opened the letters just before reading your lovely reply, the thick one which I thought would be court papers was actually a new rule saying right to buy (I so wish in other circumstances) so didn't read that fully but looks like now, these flats where I live can now be bought with discount, previously you couldn't, have to read that in more detail later.

The other, was 'the' letter but it's odd, says court action has been instructed but the rest leaves out much of what was said during the phone conversation which surprises me but if an 'outsider' read the letter it would change how they thought, perhaps some worry there about what is said in a phone call and what in writing, not sure.

The odd bit, is it says that the action is being taken due to historic nature of arrears since I moved in, 'not in credit', well of course it isn't as I'm always a month in arrears due to HB regardless of this £310 that will be left when the 2 payments are made from HB. it also says something odd and I quote:

" I am unforuntauly unable to accept your offer of £2 per week to clear these arrears as the minimum amount that the court would award is £2.85 assuming you are in receipt of benefits"

a: yes, I did make the original offer of £2 but when during the phone call she said about the £2.85 I said although I was really unable to afford that, if it would cease court action then I would have to find the money, but she wasn't interested. The other odd thing is about assuming benefits, the 'dragon' knows full well I'm on benefits and if she missed that, then she missed 75% of the phone conversation, so odd.

She makes no mention of the 2 payments I said would be made within 7 days, no mention of my obvious distress over court action or being ill, maybe that's normal but seems odd to me.

I can't get hold of CAB and each time the call is charged at £0.04 per minute than usual local calls, just get the message no one available, the bit baout £0.04 and you can remain holding to hear other info. so maybe not open today.

No dates are mentioned re court dates.

I will compose my letter today (time running away again) and get that sent off, I still haven't had the shower and need to get to the bank and make some more phone calls. My energy levels fall as the day goes on and things seem to take forever to do :-)

Not sure whether I should have quoted the whole letter or not. The letter ends with suggesting I should contact welfare rights and or cab for help with finances/court action.

I know I tend to confirm all facts of a phone call if asked so this letter makes it look a little one sided and doesn't disclose some bits I thought were relevant, like my trying to get an overdraft etc, maybe someone more objective becase I'm obviously involved and see things differently, could say.

I need 48 hours in my day presently :-)

I'm waiting for the nice man at the council/HB to call me back to see if he can officially/unofficially help regarding this 1 month in arrears, he may have had dealings on that situation previously and can advise accordingly. He's a very straight, factual person and a great contact. (he's probably thinking 'oh ....' what's up now' as he gets the message to ring me ;-)

44pinkpink

i'm glad you opened the letters - altho it sounds as tho you're no furhter ahead now that you have - you need the others here to advise you on that i think. I'll just tell you to have that shower now....you may feel so much better after that. and maybe the phone calls or the bank. Leave some of it til tomorroa if you have to (not the shower tho!!). You've already got over one hurdle today by opening the letters. doing one of the other jobs will maybe help you feel you're over another of today's hurdles too. hope so, i really do. my mind is scrambled today. at first i sat frozen thinking about everything. now i've decided to sit and plough thro paperwork ...i've done one pile between chatting to you. i'll do another now. it helps
lots love to you xx sun still shining here

44pinkpink

i've just read message i sent to you earlier - i didn't mean it to sound as it does...i meant to say that opening the letter was a good thing but that the "dragon" who sent it hasn't appeared to be of any help xx

CAT_5

Oh please don't worry, I took it in the right spirit, I do't get offended easilly, I'm a sunshiny person and rarely see or read things that aren't intended so don't worry :-)

I've been to the bank, phew and my man from the council just rang me to say he'll change my HB to fornightly and the system changed recently so will now go direct to the bank, that helps tremendously :-)

I seem to have some guardian angels hovering because I now only need to find £60.

I'm determined the 'dragon' won't intimidate me and won't have cause to follow this through. Who knows, maybe she suffers from PMT and I should be more thoughtful ;-)

Off to create next weeks menu, have another route round to see what I could sell, hard to cut down when you live frugally but where there's a will there's a way :-)

44pinkpink

oh good, things sound a bit more positive.
have you looked at the recipe section on this site? well i think i saw one xx

Savvy_Sue

falklandfred wrote:

You have been through a lot and the housing thing must be the last straw. However, I suspect that a court will not be sympathetic to the landlord's application - I support the idea of going to your local Citizens Advice Bureau as soon as possible and speaking to a debt counsellor - they are generally very experienced and helpful.
I also suspect you need to talk to someone else about the problems you have been experiencing - someone who is not there to advise, but to listen and share. Is there anyone? - perhaps your local church could put you in touch (I know of a couple people who have been helped without having religion pushed down their throat!)
Good luck

I am with falklandfred on this: it sounds as if you are either a council tenant or with a social landlord, and despite the 'habitual' nature of the arrears a court is highly unlikely to evict you if you are making regular payments towards the arrears. If £2.85 is the minimum figure they would award, then start paying that every week. One piece of advice: if a court agreement is made to pay £x, then pay it. If you make an agreement before going to court, do not be talked into paying more than you can afford (although it doesn't sound as if that is likely to happen!)

But my main point is that once an agreement is made, either at court or prior to it, it is vital to pay it every week without fail. If you break an agreement then you CAN be evicted. If you have any spare money one week, then put it aside for the week when you DON'T have any rather than make an extra payment. Because if you agree to pay £2.85 per week, if you miss a payment you are in deep mire, even if you have paid £10 the previous week.

and Dora's right, you might find it useful to see a counsellor through GP, whether or not you are depressed. You are clearly (and understandably) very stressed, and that might help.

As to the letter from the Housing Officer, it sounds like a 'standard' "we're going to court" letter. If you want her to confirm anything said in your conversation I would write to give your understanding of what was said and say that you will rely on your understanding unless she writes to correct it.

As to a DLA application (I came here from the Benefits board post!) I think you will find it emotionally quite hard to fill in the form because you do have to concentrate on what you can't do rather than on what you can do. And that's one reason why having help from someone like that nice chap Paul could be helpful: they do understand what is required and can assure you that you're not making a fuss. Also just because many people are worse off than you (disability wise rather than financially) doesn't mean you're not entitled to DLA! I don't know if you are or not, but it does sound as if your condition is quite dis-abling in terms of not being able to go out etc.

bj-sailaway

Definitely go to the CAB, years ago we hit hard times, they referred us to someone at the council offices, who arranged to freeze our debt and agreed fixed - reasonable repayments for us. They really took the stress out.

My mum has been terribly ill lately, and it feels like my worlds fallen apart, you just cant take on any extra stress or battles when you are ill.

Go to the CAB on Monday. Also, I'm sure you would qualify for Disability Living allowance if you have been so unwell and are awaiting an operation - you'd be surprised, it is paid at different levels and doesn't get included in means testing. Also, attendance allowance - be realisting and probably not your usual positive self when you complete the form - my mum was terrible, 'oh, I can manage that' when thing s are truly a struggle. PLEASE look into it, I bet you'd get your GP's backing - even if you only get it for a couple of months - every little helps.

I know religion isn't your thing, but I shall definitely pray for you.

CAT_5

Good Morning All :-)

Another letter from the 'Dragon' today, just confirming court action but no court papers yet.

44pinkpink

I haven't looked at the recipes :-) I'm quite a good cook and tend to make a lot of casseroles this weather and freeze them, saves on electricity etc, I use my slow cooker a lot for those. I've always enjoyed cooking, 99 ways to use mince etc :-) I eat a lot of poultry and fish, and like to season food and I love the smell of food when cooking :-) Always interested in new sauce recipes etc so when I have some time I'll check that out, thanks :-)

Savvy

Yes, you're correct, I'm a Housing Association tenant. I was/am already making a payment on the arrears but the previous Housing Officer agreed a different sum to the one this lady is asking (verbal agreement only). If I say I will do something, barring catastrophes I do it and you're right, I won't be bullied into something, I'm actually appalled at the way I've been treated, intimidation doesn't sit well on my shoulders, particularly when someone is already vulnerable, I have a very fair sense of right and wrong. I've never once treated any client the way I have been treated but, I appreciate everyone has their own style. If it was any other situation, I would actually be following a complaints procedure and may still do that, I'll be giving it considerable thought this weekend.

I have to admit, I've been wondering what's the best way of handling the overdraft of £250, should I apply it all to the account or use it to make the payments she wants, etc, I'm inclined to use it as a lump sum but also realise the validity of your comments about ensuring no missed arrears payments, your thoughts? Or, anyone's for that matter :-)

Unfortunately, I'm a survivor, I've got through some fairly rotten stuff in my background, I say unfortunately because I'm not good at playing meek and mild, you'd have to be aware of my past to appreciate that side of my character but what actually pulls me up is when someone does attempt to belittle, bully or intimidate me, they soon find out they chose the wrong person - politely and very firmly ;-) I firmly believe that trust is the epicentre of all relationships, whether personal or business and trust goes hand in hand with respect, I suspect I'm very much my father's daughter ;-) The point I'm trying to get across really is that whilst something's may make me cry at the time, when I reflect back, I usually find my fighting spirit and I suspect that's why I get through some of my 'difficult' moments. When I posted I was having a vulnerable time, we all have them, but I have a lot to be thankful for and take pleasure in small things too. I suppose you could say I'm a character ;-) Had I of posted the next day, I suspect the post wouldn't sound quite so 'vulnerable'.

I like your phraseology regarding the letter, I'll use that, thank you :-)

Re DLA, yes, this chap at the council also suggested that and the benefits of it being non taxable and excluded from earnings etc, and I got the impression from 'Paul (CAB) that there is very much a right and wrong way to fill this form in, from the brief discussion on the phone, he said that whilst being immobile one day and then fine the next 3 wouldn't automatically disqualify me from it, so it's definitely something I'll look into. I did speak to someone on Income Support yesterday about this IB50 I have to fill in and she also mentioned it.

Thanks for the practical advice and words of encouragement, much appreciated :-)


Bj
Sorry to hear about your mum and you own stress, life really does deal some rotten blows, HUGS

Yes, I remember thinking with horror when someone suggested perhaps a carer's allowance, blimey, there's life in this old dog yet LOL So can understand your mum's reaction :-)

I suppose some of my uncertainty comes from knowing how hard it is to prevent a chain reaction and sometimes you can end up in a corner with these forms. I have every intention of going back to work when all this is resolved and so at the back of my mind, is the medical records, I don't want to find myself in a position where an extra benefit could put paid to the type of job I do. I've already had to take 3 years plus off my working life and employers, quite rightly, want to know I'm fit for the job, I've had to pass medicals in the past so it's a semi conscious though when dealing with all of this. :-) But I'll certainly look into it :-)

Hope your mum's health improves :-)

Thanks for the prayers, I might not be religious but I respect everyone's faith, that was very kind of you, thank you :-)

Does anyone have a clue what sort of court date I may be looking at, ie this side of Christmas or not?

johannamse

Hey CAT,

Sorry I have been away for a while, been very very busy trying to sort out chaos of life.

Isn't the weather AMAZING? I love the freezing cold and the sun, My favourite weather.

I saw you thread on the benefits board. I hope we have all convinced you to apply for DLA (Disability Living Allowance). My harsh bit now...stop being so hard on yourself. You deserve this money, it is your right, and you have paid enough tax over the years to deserve it. The key to filling in any forms for the Benefits people, is to fill it in like it is your WORST day. I would ring up Paul, and book an hour appointment with him, whenever he is next free and get the DLA and the IB50 filled in.

Court dates...don't know much about this...maybe the debt board would be good. To save you typing everything out and getting tired again, you can always put a link back to this thread. Just give an outline of the situation.

I hope you are feeling a tiny bit better. You need to suck up all the help people are offering and use it.

Keep posting x