Who do you blame?

Ames

Mostly myself. The rest I split between the bank which gave me a big loan when I was working and clearly couldn't pay it back and the benefits system which left me waiting a year for what I was entitled to. But mostly me.

Broken_hearted

Myself (well both of us) there is no point blameing anyone or anything else as it only makes you bitter. If you accept its your problem you can overcome it, if you see yourself as a victim of the banks you lose your power to take control.

sarriep

DH and me.
But it does annoy me incredibly that banks lend you money AFTER checking your credit file knowing you OBVIOUSLY cannot afford to repay. This does bug me mainly because DH built up debts without me knowing and it was blatantly obvious he was struggling - solution - increase his limit so he can draw out cash to make minimum payments and increase debt.... oooh I could go on.
However £49000 in debt later (and negative equity in expensive house...) we are taking control and WILL pay it all back eventually....:o

frazzmunch

myself entirely...however (isn't there always a 'however'!!)...in one way it has been the best thing that ever happened to me!!!

No, insanity has not taken over me...but my experience has meant that my kids attitude to credit is pathologically anti !!! Both of my children have a 'if i can't pay cash, i can't afford/have it and i gain a real satisfaction knowing (hoping anyway!!) that they will never allow themselves to be in the position that i am in now...in one way it is the best lesson they will ever learn, however hard it may be for me and i really can't say that it would have been the same if i had not gotten into such trouble!!

I do feel that we were lulled into a false sense of security, a couple of years of extremely high salaries made me feel that it would always be like that, so when we had 7 credit cards with combined credit limits high enough to purchase a house (i kid you not...:eek: ) and my dh paid in a cheque and was offered a 24k loan paid in the next day when we hadn't even considered it, let alone asked for it...yep, stooooooopid us went for it thinking that we would pay everything off after christmas (this was in october 2003) in about six months.....cut to serious illness, no employment and no income by Jan 04 and the rest is painful history.....

still paying now, may well be paying till i die....lessons may be hard, but if i had learnt the value of money when i had the opportunity it would have been a lot easier....:rotfl:

cantcope

Great thread I've thought about this a lot.

When i first had my LBM i blamed the gambling sites as they encouraged me to spend more than i could afford by offering big prizes for who played this game the most/entered the comps/got the most royal flushes in a week etc. It seemed easy to win big bucks for a (at the beginning) small outlay which resulted in me getting totally hooked and consumed by it.

Then i blamed the bank as i had a meeting with the manager twice and told her that my debt was because i was gambling but i was definitely going to stop so they gave me another £5k...

None of these people forced me to spend my life savings and get loans/credit cards. They just made it easy for me.

I can't knock them for that. How many times do we wish suppliers would make it easy for us?!

I've learnt there is no point in blaming anyone as it makes the journey to being Debt Free that much tougher. If you blame yourself it just makes you depressed and feel weak. Better to concentrate on being strong and paying it all back while learning along the way x

stratdude

I have promised myself no more credit, like the old fashioned way if I don't have the money I dont have it. I have learnt my lesson.

slig

The only person to blame is myself, however I don't know if 'blame' is the right word as the money paid for me to do my Masters, and then I put off repaying it by going travelling instead. But those are two of the best things I have ever done, so i don't really regret it. I just wish I'd learnt to budget/live within my means a bit earlier!

Numpty_Monkey

I blame my exOH and my stupidity and my nievity

But as I'm ressponsible for paying it back
the blame is mine

mooomin

Another person blaming herself here!! I struggled with money when I left home and chose debt over budgeting.

That being said, I also blame my employer (A bank) for throwing offers of debt at me as soon as I started, and because I wasn't financially savvy at that time I accepted them all.

Me: Ooh, my credit card balance is huge
Them: A loan would make that cheaper
Me: Ooh, I'll take that
*nice clothes in shop window*
Me: I don't have a balance on my credit card any more, so I can afford that.
Repeat as required until you have 9k+ of debt :mad:

Bah.

MidlandsMum

My husband. He's the sort that goes for the instant gratification. I'm the sort who gets guilty buying a lipstick. I had to spend on my cards to buy food and necesstites as he would clear the bank accounts first and then start on the credit cards. He's still not learned his lesson, so I'm clearing my personal debts.