A 22 year olds right to enter the family home?

vaksam

Basically the situation is as above. My 22 year old brother has finally been asked to leave the family home after many, many years of problems.

The most recent has been his moving his stuff back into my mum's house in Manchester after quitting his job in Nottingham. He then proceeded to open a number of bank accounts, registering them all to my mums address, and has run up numerous overdrafts to finance a trip round Europe. He arrived back at my mums house, (my mum for some unknown reason let him stay), and has basically declared his intent to remain jobless and lie in bed with his girlfriend all day, contributing nothing financially or otherwise to the family.

This weekend my mum had enough and has ordered him out. She's asked him to come and collect his possessions, which she wants to leave outside at a pre-arranged time so he doesn't have to enter the property (there have been problems in the past with threatening behaviour and violence from him).

He will not accept this, is determined that he should be allowed to enter as and when he wishes to collect his things, and that he has 'the right' to do so. From what I can tell reading various postings on the internet, as he has not been paying rent and has no tenancy agreement he has no legal rights to access the property. Is this correct?

Dill

If there have been threats and violence your mum may want to change the locks, etc to be on the safe side.
As regards 'rights', I'd think your parents are entitled to say who can or can't live in their property. If he has only lived there on and off (?) and he hasn't paid anything towards the mortgage, I wonder what makes him think he has any 'right' to it?

Margaret54

I hope this all gets sorted for your Mum can surely do without all this stress. I honestly would not think he has any rights at all about anything to do with the house, and especially when he has not contributed to anything either. It must be a real headache for your Mum, and I wish her all the very bestxx

vaksam

Many thanks both of you. Yes she has already changed the locks, and I thought this was right but was just so flabbergasted by his interpretation of what his 'rights' are that didn't know what to think!

Anyway, the 'necessities' that he's requested are now in my mums hall, ready to be put out on the front doorstep at noon tomorrow, when he's arranged to come and pick them up. My OH and I are going to be in the house too, just to give her some support.

Once again many thanks to you both.

whatatwit

If your mum knows where he will be living, then make sure she writes this as a forwarding address on the mail she will no doubt receive.
If she doesn't know it, then write not known on the envelopes and bung it back into the post box.

kr15snw

He has no right, and your mum may think shes being mean but this is what he needs!

Although its very different my brother is 30 and at home and pays about £100 a month to my mum when he earns about 25k a year. She does EVERYTHING for him and I keep telling her she has to do somthing as this is getting silly.

When you ask him if hes saving for his own place, or if he thinks he should contribute more he says he doesnt see the point as mum will always have him there.....

sarymclary

I suggest if your brother creates any kind of scene your mum rings for the police immediately. If she has any other kind of hassle from him whether written, verbal or otherwise, so long as there is evidence to support it, and the brother has been told not to do it, he can be charged with harrassment if there are 2 such evidenced incidents.

I have problems with some ex-relatives, but a policeman advised me last week that there only needs to be 2 separate incidents (evidenced) such as letters, phone messages, texts, emails or unwanted visits, and I could press charges under harrassment law.

Since your mother has been threatened by her bullying son, perhaps she might just need the long arm of the law to back her up, and make this immature young man accept that he has to be responsible for himself from now on, to grow up, and stand on his own two feet.

I also recommend having his mail forwarded by writing the new address on the envelopes, or if unknown just write 'return to sender - moved away' and bung them back in the post box. I did this with the previous tennant in my house who obviously was trying to cover her tracks after moving on from here, and left no forwarding address, and all her unwanted mail came here. It's taken a while, but I get very little now, and I returned every item that came for her.

vaksam

Many thanks for all your posts, and apologies for not having picked them up sooner, succumbed to the lurgy over the weekend

Just a quick update, he came and picked up his 'necessities' from the doorstep on Sunday and he hasn't been heard from since. Mum's sending on any of his mail that comes to his GFs parents house, although I did tell her to just return to sender - much quicker and easier that way and something we've had to do for former residents of our flat who evidently scarpered owing quite a lot of money! She's also going to speak to citizens advice regarding disassociating her address from all of the debt he's been racking up - final bills from Eon and the Council have arrived this week in connection with his former house in Nottingham.

I'm in total aggreement that this is the best thing for him - I just hope that he's forced to stand on his own two feet a little more, and he's not just going to leech off his GF's family... but I doubt it, for now anyway.

I hope that he does eventually come out of the other side of this as a more stable and well adjusted individual, so am hoping mum does stay strong and not take him in again if it all goes wrong with GF and he turns up on the doorstep pleading poverty in a few months time!

Paparika

Good for your mum

He has no rights, as said no tenancy agreement etc, if he want's to dos about in bed with his gf, let him learn the hard way in his very own place and see how long he lasts.

As for his post, return to sender, as i bet your mum will be having lots of letter for unpaid bills very very soon.

And the very worse thing she could do is feel sorry for him and pay them off.