Depression Support Thread

Diamond78

CompletelyLost wrote: »

Hi,

I posted on the old thread a few nights ago... sounds silly but I was panicking that I'd be ignored, so thank you all for the welcome.

absolutebounder: you described my parents perfectly! They were very controlling until I turned 19, and now they've dropped in at the deep end I am finding it very difficult to cope. They don't want any responsibility for me. I hate them for it. They can't understand my frustration... they frequently tell me to 'get over it' and 'grow up'. :mad:

Anyway, I'm feeling slightly more positive today I think it helps to get up early instead of lying in until 2pm (I was up at 9am today despite not falling asleep until after 4am :rolleyes:).

My family have been on holiday for 6-weeks... and they are back in a fortnight, so I'm panicking like crazy. I think they are expecting me to be cured, but alas, I'm the same as I was before they left. I just want to do something to prove that I am trying... I have contacted my local college about doing an accountancy course (by email of course - to scared to call and talk to a real person!) so hopefully they'll get back to me.

Hope you're all having a good day. I'm off to make myself a coffee. :coffee:

Hiya welcome to the thread. I didnt welcome you before as I wasnt here. Im sorry to hear the troubles you have had to go through. I havent read what you posted before but from what you have written now, it shows you are trying. I know from experience how difficult and hard parents can be but you are trying and thats the main thing. Well done for feeling positive today. I got to dash in a bit but im sure we will catch up sometime. Enjoy your coffee i think thats what I need to feel awake lol. Bye for now and hugs xx

Amber_Sunshine

SF, !!!!!! your parents and cousins, stop comparing yourself to others! Who cares what they've achieved academically and professionally, we can't all be high achievers and it doesn't mean they're nice or happy. Of course you can't just bloody 'get over it' (there, that's one fault I found that they have, I bet there's a lot more to add to that).

Diamond78

slowlyfading wrote: »

I'm okay thanks, how are you today? xx

Im ok sweety, just suffering with an ear infection thats not very nice but luckily getting better. Im very tired and off to the cinema in a bit so hoping I wont fall asleep. Take care and chat soon.Hugs xx

slowlyfading

Amber_Sunshine wrote: »

SF, !!!!!! your parents and cousins, stop comparing yourself to others! Who cares what they've achieved academically and professionally, we can't all be high achievers and it doesn't mean they're nice or happy. Of course you can't just bloody 'get over it' (there, that's one fault I found that they have, I bet there's a lot more to add to that).

They are really nice people, but that's beside the point :rolleyes: I know I know, I have to stop comparing myself to others.... if only it was that easy.

slowlyfading

Diamond78 wrote: »

Im ok sweety, just suffering with an ear infection thats not very nice but luckily getting better. Im very tired and off to the cinema in a bit so hoping I wont fall asleep. Take care and chat soon.Hugs xx

What are you going to see? I hope you have a good time xx

LadyMorticia

Haha, I'm just remembering my doctor's reaction this morning when we were discussing something medical. She said I knew more about the condition than she does. That made me feel quite knowledgeable, and it wasn't even a mental health condition.
I hold onto little things like that. They keep me going.

xx

goodlife

Hi to everyone, thank you for all making me feel so welcome. It's also really nice that people post so frequently here. I'm not keen on leaving the house too much at the minute (although I do go out in my local area) so it's nice having people to 'talk' to.

Shazza - I'm in a similar situation to you. The pay thing is really worrying me. I don't know if I'm allowed to ask this and you may not wish to answer but .... are you a teacher by any chance? I am. I can't stand it. What am I going to do?

J x

absolutebounder

CompletelyLost wrote: »

.

absolutebounder: you described my parents perfectly! They were very controlling until I turned 19, and now they've dropped in at the deep end I am finding it very difficult to cope. They don't want any responsibility for me. I hate them for it. They can't understand my frustration... they frequently tell me to 'get over it' and 'grow up'. :mad:

My mother was dominating. It wasnt that she didnt love me. She Did, but she wanted to impose her reality of life on me and live her life again through me. It is very common but also damaging and you need to break away from it

Anyway, I'm feeling slightly more positive today I think it helps to get up early instead of lying in until 2pm (I was up at 9am today despite not falling asleep until after 4am :rolleyes:).

Yes it will help if you get a normal sleep pattern. I would say get up even earlier more like 7.30

My family have been on holiday for 6-weeks... and they are back in a fortnight, so I'm panicking like crazy. I think they are expecting me to be cured, but alas, I'm the same as I was before they left. I just want to do something to prove that I am trying... I have contacted my local college about doing an accountancy course (by email of course - to scared to call and talk to a real person!) so hopefully they'll get back to me.

Now this last paragraph shows what I mean by people putting on a mask for others. You are, I am afraid, ducking the issue by just wanting something to prove you are trying. I dont think an accountancy course is going to do much good if you are too scared to call a real person.
You need to get some independence of your family and you do that by earning your own way even if its making pizas for pizzahut. That way you learn to interact with people of your own age and have fun. Alternatively as I recommended try a befriending organisation where you go round helping the elderly and disabled people. Yes some are grumpy old gits at first and some are really lovely people. Giving your time can be very rewarding and I expect you can find out much more advice on how to still love but interact with parents.
You dont have to answer but where abouts in the country are you.

Lady Morticia Haha, I'm just remembering my doctor's reaction this morning when we were discussing something medical. She said I knew more about the condition than she does. That made me feel quite knowledgeable, and it wasn't even a mental health condition.
I hold onto little things like that. They keep me going.

LM No matter what our skills there is always something we dont know. There is always some way in which you are cleverer than the person you are talking to. That is why no one should feel they are worthless. Look on DT and there is a thread about a guy who had a stroke and took up digital art. His is crap compared to yours and hes been paid 30K. I wish there was someone locally who could help you make money out of yours.

LadyMorticia

absolutebounder wrote: »

LM No matter what our skills there is always something we dont know. There is always some way in which you are cleverer than the person you are talking to. That is why no one should feel they are worthless. Look on DT and there is a thread about a guy who had a stroke and took up digital art. His is crap compared to yours and hes been paid 30K. I wish there was someone locally who could help you make money out of yours.

You are right. We are always learning new things and nobody will ever die knowing everything. I think that knowing everything would take the mystery out of life and learning.

I haven't seen that thread in DT yet so I will go have a little nosey. I don't really believe in my ability as an artist but that is to do with me and nobody else. I love art and I'm hoping that one day I will believe that I am good enough at it.

xx

shazrobo

hi all hope everybody is ok this evening.
had a good day today, took both sons into town, and they were very well behaved, and i was proud of them. then went to craft class this afternoon, which for those of you that dont know, is held in a mental health clinic, i have been going there twice a week for some time now. and as i am slowly and gradually getting better, they are going to discharge me from there, and support me in finding activities and groups that i can do in the local community. bit scared and anxious, but to start off with i will have my key worker supporting me and coming into these activities with me, til i feel able to go alone. the activities lined up so far, are a dressmaking class, a craft group, and joining a small local gym. longer term plans are to go back into education, and prepare myself for going back to work sometime in the future, which will prob be when kids reach 18, long time off, but now is an ideal time for me to learn, around there school hours, and whilst i still get benefits for the lads.
after today, and also seeing my councillor yesterday, i can see how far i have actually come since this time last year, when i hit rock bottom, and thought i would never have a future.
sorry for long post, but as you have all been there for me through the darkest times, i thought you would like to hear the positives too.
big hugs all
shaz xxx