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yorkshirepudding_4

put pullups are for children who are not trined enough to hold it are they not? she is more than capable of using the toilet with no accidents. it is only because she hasnt had to hold it while she is there because the potty is always there. and yes i feel his folks do support him, because he was spoilt in the same way and was babied a lot. ive suggested to him that i go over and pick her up last thing at night he is thinking about it so we'll have to see what he says.

tsstss7

have I got it wrong or does your oh really keep a 4 yr old up until 9pm - my ds1 would be jealous he was put to bed at 6.30 until he was 7 !! ( much later nowit's the school hols and he is older though...these light nights!)

yorkshirepudding_4

yes she has always stayed up till that time, she has never needed much sleep, most nights she wakes up after eight hours so if i put her to bed at 6.30 she would wake up at 3. how would a dad see much of his child if he/she went to bed so early? he would just be getting home as she was going to bed and i'm not in favour of that. yeah if she slept for 12 hours a night i would put her to bed earlier but unfortunately she's not like that. plus its not a case of "keeping her up" she just doesn't get tired, sometimes she's still going strong after 10. What am i supposed to do?

tsstss7

Good luck with this one YP but had to let you know that you cannot change the way your ex is with the lo however much you hate his style of parenting (up to a point I guess) my ds1 was a vegetarian until me and his dad split up at which point ex starts feeding him all the meat I truely hate (jamie olivers pet hate too - burger and cheap sausages).

Your best ammo is to just to continue to do what you believe is the best for your ds and regularly consult the dad in little decisions (micro manage if poss) this way he feels involved and is less likely to go against the decisions made.

If you feel that you aren't getting enough time with ds why not change the contact times altogether to say wed/thur to fri/sat night - at the mo your ds seems to be getting passed around rather alot and it must be very confusing for her at her age...constant partings with associated emotional upheaval are hard on such a young child ....at least if your ex did a period of time you could have a real break and you wouldn't feel like a glorified nanny when you did have her.

tsstss7

yorkshirepudding wrote: »

yes she has always stayed up till that time, she has never needed much sleep, most nights she wakes up after eight hours so if i put her to bed at 6.30 she would wake up at 3. how would a dad see much of his child if he/she went to bed so early? he would just be getting home as she was going to bed and i'm not in favour of that. yeah if she slept for 12 hours a night i would put her to bed earlier but unfortunately she's not like that. plus its not a case of "keeping her up" she just doesn't get tired, sometimes she's still going strong after 10. What am i supposed to do?

Sorry didn't mean to offend - I'm just old fashioned in that way I guess...up till my ds1 was 3 he didn't have a proper bedtime as I was young and didn't really know about the benefits of routine (in fact I hated routine in those days - how things change lol) but when he started playgroup (the old fashioned sort led by parents) I started to see a need for him to be in bed earlier and to my surprise his mood and behaviour improved greatly - hence my conversion.

yorkshirepudding_4

i too am a great fan of routine, ours just starts later than yours. it was a genuine request for advice, if you had a child that only slept for 8 hours each night and didn't get remotely tired till he had been awake for 16, what time would you put him to bed?