comfort please

gabgab

My wonderful Dad or Daddio as I liked to call him died 30 mins ago, and I've no one to comfort me .My daughter of course is upset but at the moment I am of little use.

Please could someone give me a hug?

trickytrolleys

How awful - so sorry to hear that - I also call my dad daddio! My mum passed away a few years ago and i know how devastatingly horrible it is - sending you a big hug and although there is nothing I can say to help I always think that i would rather have had my mum for the time i did (i was 23 when she died) than anyone else for a hundred years! Be strong and try to focus on happy times (hard i know).
was it sudden? Not that expecting it makes it any different when it happens!

is there anyone you can call? I certainly would not mind my friends calling at 1 in the morning at a time like this - mine usually call me at that time when theyve had a few! Im teary for you!

Quasar

Oh gabgab, I really feel for you. I remember that night on 9 March 1989 when I got a call from Italy at about 23:30. My dad had had a massive heart attack that morning and died almost immediately, and I was out all day and my family frantically tried to contact me and called every half an hour or so (I had no answering machine at the time). Apparently he caught a chill and this did his lungs in, which were already weakened by a lifetime of smoking.

I remember booking a flight and rushing to the airport and getting home... oh, it was just awful.

This is well in the past for me, but for you gabgab it's still practically now, and I just want you to know that there are people here who think about you, whoever you are and wherever you are. Be strong.

And bless you and your daughter. XXX

Q

Peakma

I'm so sorry heres another great big HUG.Grief is such a weird feeling, I'm so sorry your having to go through this.My younger brother died 8 years ago now (it doesn't feel that long), but I found comfort in these two poems, I hope you can too.Be strong, but let your tears flow.

Do not stand at my grave and weep
I am not there, I do not sleep
I am a 1,000 winds that blow
I am the diamond glints on snow
I am the sun on ripened grain
I am the gentle autumn rain
When you awaken in the morning's hush
I am the swift uplifting rush
Of quiet birds in circled light
I am the soft star that shines at night
Do not stand at my grave and cry
I am not there; I did not die.
Anonymous


All Is Well
Death is nothing at all,
I have only slipped into the next room
I am I and you are you
Whatever we were to each other, that we are still.
Call me by my old familiar name,
Speak to me in the easy way which you always used
Put no difference in your tone,
Wear no forced air of solemnity or sorrow
Laugh as we always laughed at the little jokes we enjoyed together.
Play, smile, think of me, pray for me.
Let my name be ever the household world that it always was,
Let it be spoken without effect, without the trace of shadow on it.
Life means all that it ever meant.
It it the same as it ever was, there is unbroken continuity.
Why should I be out of mind because I am out of sight?
I am waiting for you, for an interval, somewhere very near,
Just around the corner.

All is well.
Henry Scott Holland
1847-1918
Canon of St Paul's Cathedral

I'm in tears now too, after reading these, I hope they don't upset you more.Good luck with coping with with the greif.

Sheel

Big *hugs* from me too

My Mum and Dad have both died within the last 2 years or so , so I can still remember vividly what it's like to lose a parent

I found great comfort on here when my Mum died and hope you will too.

I was going to post Peakma's second poem too as I found comforts in the words also

Sheel xxx

Lucy_Lastic

I feel for you and send a big hug. My father died suddenly and it took a while to sink in, it was the weirdest feeling. You have to go through the various stages of grief, which will take a while, but rest assured, time does heal the pain. I would agree with mcelhinney, think of the happy times. I believe that we will be together again with those we loved.
God bless.

gabgab

Thanks mc ,Dad was 93 ,so all you young -ers would think -oh he had good innings all that stuff, but actually when your parent gets to this age you feel like they will go on forever.And Dad wanted to get 100 card from queen
Dad was 6.2 high with muscles to match,Clark Gable looks(the girls at my school used to hang out of the window to get a look at the hunk)
But what my Dad really excelled at was relating to children.They loved him -we all loved him--good night God bless Daddio xx

Queenie

((((((My heartfelt condolences)))))))

It is sooo very hard to lose a parent (no matter what age *they* are, or what age *you* are)!


Give yourself time to grieve, time to heal. Do not expect to be "back to normal" and able to cope with the emotions of those around you; you need to be gentle with yourself and give yourself permission to take time out to feel your feelings.

I hope you'll take a measure of comfort from those on here who have experienced similar.

((hugs))

building

so sorry to hear about your dad. i thought i would send you my thoughts too. my parents are only in their 60s but at the moment i often think of the whole ageing thing and i find it hard to deal with. I had some tears for you when reading through this thread. I really do feel for you. it may not be the right time but i thought i would pick up a book on the whole thing of ageing and how to deal with death. maybe there is something when you can cope with it a bit worth reading which will help to find comfort? god bless.

gabgab wrote:

My wonderful Dad or Daddio as I liked to call him died 30 mins ago, and I've no one to comfort me .My daughter of course is upset but at the moment I am of little use.

Please could someone give me a hug?

gravitytolls

Huge hugs from Norfolk also.

My grandad died 2 years ago. He was teh nearest thing to a father I had. The pain was beyond anything I had ever felt before, I truly thought it would kill me. The funeral was the worst day of my life.

You've lost your daddio, your heart is breaking, and the grief won't pass any time soon.

But, it will lessen and once the worst of the arrangements are over, the pain wil have resided enough for you to feel him with you. He loved you and the family, and that will live on in your heart, he'll always be with you, and will never leave you. Truly, you may not know it now, but his death won't come between you.

Take care pet, and if you really feel you can't cope with it ina few weeks, get and see your Doc.

Becles

So sorry to hear of your loss. Thinking of you *hugs*



Can only imagine what you are going through. Don't forgot all your friends on here. If you need a shoulder, just drop a PM. Take care xx