Childcare costs

katiesmummy

I have just come back from looking round a local nursery for my ds. it is a lovely nursery and i think he would love it there- until i heard the monthly fee-

£880 for 3 days per week!!!!!


Even with tax credits there is no way we could afford that (i will be at college and oh works but self employed)

back to the drawing board i think. i may have to go with a childminder instead which i really didnt want to do, but it may be all we can afford

galvanizersbaby

BernadetteN wrote: »

I'm going to make myself unpopular here but I would not dream of having children with someone if they weren't willing to accept at least playing some part in the care of them! It's something I would have discussed BEFORE having children - and yes I know not all children are planned, our first one was conceived after only a few weeks but I still knew my partner's views on child care before I got pregnant.

It seems really incredible to be paying £700 a month in child care instead of a parent looking after their own child. I go mad staying at home all day sometimes too, as I'm sure do all mums occasionally or perhaps more oftern, and I've given up full time work at a considerable financial loss because I want our kids to be with their parents for the few short formative years of their lives.

Really I would expect my partner to stay at home, if he is the lower earner, rather than being no better off and your child spending such long hours away from home.

Just my opinion but tbh before I had my children I was the lower earner and fully expected to be a stay at home mum - however the reality was I couldn't cope on my own with my child/children all day (wasn't helped by the fact I had PND, no social outlets/transport) but if I had to stay at home I'm not sure I could have coped.
I was pretty isolated and I'm fairly certain I would have struggled to find things to do and places to go.
I honestly thought I could do it prior to having them but the reality was I couldn't - I never regretted my choice to go back to work and as it turned out my husband left me so I was very glad I had.
I think it very much depends on the parent/circumstances - I am not sure of the benefits to any child of being looked after by an unhappy/reluctant parent and as I said views can differ once baby actually arrives.
Think it's a bit harsh to suggest that the OP's OH should be looking after the baby if he is not happy/confident to do so

*Louise*

Hi yorks-lass

You do have a few options, it's just most seem unsuitable for you:

- Change nurseries
- Get a wage rise (prob not possible though)
- Hubby finds a new job with better pay
- Hubby goes p/t = reducing nursery fees
- Hubby stays at home with kids.

I can't see how you're going to manage without some sort of compromise between you.

I stay at home with my kids - we couldn't afford nursery fees for 2 (3 during school holidays!)

It drives me mad sometimes, but it benefits our family in the long run. Plus it's nice for the kids to be brought up by a parent.


I hope between you and your husband you can find a solution

Sarahsaver

he really isn't the right sort of person to be doing full-time childcare - the baby is much better off in nursery.

MAKE him so!

it would make so much sense for all of you, financially and logistically, and it is a shame that you feel your baby is better in a nursery than with its father

daveyjp

You shouldn't lose out on the tax situation as your tax credits should take into account your husband not getting vouchers.

It's the call you have to make. If I sat down and worked it out my wife probably works for about £100 a month by the time we pay for childcare and car running costs.

But, we knew max childcare costs were only for just over 2 years ( as 15 free hours kick in at 3) and the car will be paid for next year. Come early next year we will be much better off.

My wife also enjoys her work and there is no doubt our daughter really enjoys being with a group of 10-15 other children her age.

galvanizersbaby

Sarahsaver wrote: »

he really isn't the right sort of person to be doing full-time childcare - the baby is much better off in nursery.

MAKE him so!

it would make so much sense for all of you, financially and logistically, and it is a shame that you feel your baby is better in a nursery than with its father

I can't help but think this is going off track - probably depends on the reasons that the person isn't happy/confident to look after a child full-time but as another poster says surely you have to look at the bigger picture and childcare won't be as expensive once the child turns 3 and then will reduce dramatically once they start school.
I think if the OP is unwilling to change anything now (i.e. find cheaper more affordable childcare/better jobs etc...) then quite frankly as she says she will have to live with it

minihay

I understand totally - am just about to give up work as am actually out of pocket after paying for nursery (3 yr old) and after school club (6 yr old) and have decided it's just not worth it. Both our companies don't participate in the voucher scheme which hasn't helped.

We don't get any help from Tax Credits as are in this "middle income" bracket but there's a huge difference and if we were earning the top amount then we wouldn't need any help!!

So have decided to stop work and try again in another year when DS starts school. Bit depressing as I lose my identity again and go back to just being "Mummy" and don't think I can handle going to all the toddler groups again - but on the plus side we're getting a puppy and I'm sure she'll keep me busy. :rotfl:

It will get easier.

scoobydo_2

I know you say your happy with the nursery but I am a childminder and I have had quite a few kids where their parents were happy with the nursery but once the prices got out of control and niggly little problem have rung me enquiring about the service I provide and end up moving their child to me . One parent I have is very particular and is expecting her second baby and now she's had a minder she won't use a nursery as we provide a much more individual care .Its just a thought maybe look at some minders and see how you feel but don't think your getting a poor mans childcare we work to the same OFSTED and Gov standards EYFS from sept .

Sarahsaver

Maybe the Op's OH could get a better paid job during the summer, or do agency work/night shifts or something like that? I dont think i was going off at a tangent, if childcare is an issue for them NOW and he would be working for next to nothing then some compromise needs to be made.
I used to be a teacher and the hours you need childcare can be quite long too and you may not always find something either to fit or affordable, and you have to pay retainers over the holidays. Also when the kids are 3 they may not be in school full time.
Another thought is OH not in a union which would fight his corner re. childcare vouchers? Or get a job with someone who DOES offer them. I know mr Tesco does, and they pay more than the minimum wage there too.

galvanizersbaby

Sarahsaver wrote: »

Maybe the Op's OH could get a better paid job during the summer, or do agency work/night shifts or something like that? I dont think i was going off at a tangent, if childcare is an issue for them NOW and he would be working for next to nothing then some compromise needs to be made.
I used to be a teacher and the hours you need childcare can be quite long too and you may not always find something either to fit or affordable, and you have to pay retainers over the holidays. Also when the kids are 3 they may not be in school full time.
Another thought is OH not in a union which would fight his corner re. childcare vouchers? Or get a job with someone who DOES offer them. I know mr Tesco does, and they pay more than the minimum wage there too.

Just thought it was a bit harsh that a few seemed to be implying that her OH should be looking after the child (I'm not sure of the exact reasons why this is not the case but I got the impression that the OP was happy and accepted this - I could be wrong)
Re when the child is 3 I was thinking of EYEE (Early Years Entitlement)where the government will pay a certain amount (number of hours per week) towards childcare for them (this is the same for any child regardless as far as I'm aware)
I did not realise it would be so difficult for a teacher to get childcare - I thought for school age children it would be ideal as most people are after term time only jobs.
I guess for pre-school children they would be in the same boat as others though and have to pay nurseries/childminders regardless of whether they need the service
Don't think many of us are lucky enough to be able to tick all the boxes where it comes to childcare sadly!