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  • FIRST POST
    • Hillwalker17
    • By Hillwalker17 6th Mar 17, 6:38 PM
    • 59Posts
    • 118Thanks
    Hillwalker17
    Compulsive borrower to compulsive saver?
    • #1
    • 6th Mar 17, 6:38 PM
    Compulsive borrower to compulsive saver? 6th Mar 17 at 6:38 PM
    Hello MSE

    I've been a visitor to this website for many years, but I've never signed up or posted. I'm hoping to turn my financial mess of a life around and I'm hoping this diary will help

    I'm in my mid 20's, live with my partner is her house (she bought it because I had no money ) and I work in a decent job for about £2k a month.

    My financial situation is a bit of a mess due to having past gambling issues (still not over) and spending stupid money on expensive cars/s. I've had numerous loans and credit cards over the years and have struggled financially the past 2 years paying everything off.

    I have 3 loans and a credit card. I was on track to have they paid off by the end of the year, but circumstances have slightly changed and I just can't do it. I have applied for a £10k loan over 2 years so give myself some breathing space.

    This £10k loan will pay off the 3 other loans and the credit card. I think the totals are about

    Loan 1 - £3.6k
    Loan 2 - £3.4k
    Loan 3 - £1.2k
    Credit Card £1.4k

    I've signed the documentation for the loan and hopefully the money should be in my account later this week.

    My aims this week are to

    1) Find out the exact balances of each loan and see how much of the £10k I will have left
    2) Pay off the old loans and credit card with the new loan money
    3) Build up an emergency £500 fund (cash so I can't gamble it away).
    4) Sort out my online gambling issue (I've relapsed recently ).

    I've done ok for 2 years with both the money aspect and no gambling however 2017 has seen me place a few bets and loose quite a bit of money. This was me being stupid and careless. I will sort this out by reading again (hobby) and making sure I do other things when i'm bored.

    I've seen people post an statement of their income/outgoings. I will do this once this weeks tasks have been completed and it will hopefully put me back in the green with my monthly accounts

    Oh yes, I forgot to mention, I have no savings either

    All the best

    HW17
Page 1
    • Naomim
    • By Naomim 6th Mar 17, 7:22 PM
    • 1,175 Posts
    • 2,672 Thanks
    Naomim
    • #2
    • 6th Mar 17, 7:22 PM
    • #2
    • 6th Mar 17, 7:22 PM
    Hi,

    Posting up an SOA is a great place to start and lots of people will be able to help I'm sure.

    Naomi
    CC's Nov16 £18,609.97 / Feb17 £19222.48 Overdraft Nov16 £2,416.88 / Feb17 £1863.48
    £2 savings club #26 £48 NSD'S Feb17 2/8
    Here's my diary: A Ditherer's Diary Again
    • SkintTeacher
    • By SkintTeacher 6th Mar 17, 7:25 PM
    • 296 Posts
    • 1,593 Thanks
    SkintTeacher
    • #3
    • 6th Mar 17, 7:25 PM
    • #3
    • 6th Mar 17, 7:25 PM
    Hiya,
    just popping by to wish you luck... and suggest that you can't fix the gambling problem without some kind of outside help. Your partner sounds supportive - I assume she knows the whole truth and nothing but the truth?
    • Hillwalker17
    • By Hillwalker17 8th Mar 17, 12:12 PM
    • 59 Posts
    • 118 Thanks
    Hillwalker17
    • #4
    • 8th Mar 17, 12:12 PM
    • #4
    • 8th Mar 17, 12:12 PM
    Hi Niomim and SkinTeacher and thanks for posting

    I'll first write about the good news, the £10K loan was approved by Santander at a rate of just under 7% and upon checking my bank this morning, it is already sitting there

    Also, no more gambling thoughts and I closed down the online account I had been using. No more stupid money going to these rich online companies

    My partner knows about the previous habits and my exact financial situation, however I haven't broken the news about my recent relapse and the loan. She is going through a few issues at her work the moment so it needs to wait a while. I don't want to put too much on her and this is obviously a huge weight.

    First thing I did this morning was I logged into my credit card account and paid £1K off the balance. The balance hasn't update in a few days and as I used the card a few days before creating this thread, there are a few transactions yet to appear . I'm hoping it's only going to be another £200/£300 for it to be completely paid off.

    I'm waiting until Monday to phone the 3 loan providers and pay off the loans as all my monthly payments for them have been in the last few days and one tomorrow. I'm hoping if I wait till Monday all the balances will be 100% accurate and I can just pay them off all in the same day.

    I can't wait to do my incoming / outgoings as I know I should have a good bit left each month now. I will definitely do these once the loans are sorted. I actually only have about 3 direct debits anyway so it will be pretty short

    Ohhhhh I nearly forgot, I got a new book from a charity shop yesterday for £1!!!. Its absolutely fantastic. Anyone else heard of Mark Billingham and the DI Tom Thorne series

    I've been on here a lot recently, trying to get into the MSE mode. Anyone got any tips to joining any challenges?

    Thanks for reading

    H17
    • VelvetFreak
    • By VelvetFreak 9th Mar 17, 10:21 AM
    • 90 Posts
    • 227 Thanks
    VelvetFreak
    • #5
    • 9th Mar 17, 10:21 AM
    • #5
    • 9th Mar 17, 10:21 AM
    Hello! Found you!

    Best of luck. Sounds like you're on track so far.

    My number one tip would be - look up Dave Ramsey. I will admit that I am not his biggest fan, as he is kind of obnoxious and a bit too traditional/religious for my taste, but his method is what finally set me on the right path. I have always been "good" with money, to a degree. I work in financial services and have always had a keen interest in this sort of stuff, but it was Dave Ramsey that actually made me wake up to myself once and for all.

    Obviously you need to do a budget and all of that jazz. A tip I will give for cutting costs is to look at the big things but also look at the small things. If you can save a huge chunk on your phone bill every month, then that is great, but also look at doing little things like switching to a cheaper brands of household products, etc.

    Minimise and Declutter! It is so motivating as you get to really see all the utter crap that you've spent money on over the years. This will discourage buying more crap.

    I'm not from your neck of the woods so I won't be able to help much with this part, but you should definitely post your SOA so you can get some help with where you might be able to cut back.

    Link to SOA calculator http://www.stoozing.com/calculator/soa.php
    Family Loan $5135/$8000 = -$2865
    Emergency Fund $1625/$10,000
    Mini Cash Savings = $10/$100
    • Hillwalker17
    • By Hillwalker17 9th Mar 17, 5:54 PM
    • 59 Posts
    • 118 Thanks
    Hillwalker17
    • #6
    • 9th Mar 17, 5:54 PM
    • #6
    • 9th Mar 17, 5:54 PM
    Hi VelvetFreak and thanks for the post. You have reminded me about my phone contract, it ends later this year and I need to look at a sim only contract, so i'm not paying silly money for the latest phone

    Today has been a good day. Me and the girlfriend went away on a wee day trip which was good fun. On the way home I withdrew £300 from the bank and used £32 of it to fuel up the car so that's it full for another while. I'm keeping £3 for my spends this weekend (wee treat) and put the remaining £265 into my emergency pot. I already had £175 in there before hand so now there is £440 sitting in it. I'm looking to get this up to £600/£700 ASAP after the loans are paid off. I've joined the emergency pot challenge on here with the long term target of saving 3 months wages (around £6k). This is something that will take years but there is no harm in starting now I suppose

    I sold a few things on Ebay last months so I had to pay around £8 in fees so that was something else to come out of the account.

    I'm still waiting for the paperwork for the loan to come through for me to know what date the new loan comes out. The new loan is roughly £450 a month.

    My other direct debits are

    Mobile Phone Bill - £50
    Car Tax - £25
    Car - £25

    My phone contract doesn't end until the end of the year so I can't reduce it at the moment. It's something that I will look into in the later part of the year. As for the car tax/ , my renewals are in the Summer so I will see about paying these off straight away rather than in installments

    I contribute between £750-£800 a month into the joint account between me and the Mrs. This covers everything household related and all the birthdays/trips away. This means that whatever i'm left with is mine. I do intend however to save every penny

    The only spends I can think off at the moment is a weekend away with a few friends in April, should cost about £100. This is a yearly thing and not something I wouldn't cancel.

    I think my wee car is on the way out, it's an old Skoda... She's been great for 4 years but it's not time to think that it won't last forever. Hopefully it flies through the MOT in July and doesn't cost me much

    Anyway enough of me, how is everyone else?

    HW17
    Ex Gambling Addict - Last bet made on 15/03/2017 - 29 Days
    Slowly building an emergency fund - £1000/£6000
    • carbootcrazy
    • By carbootcrazy 10th Mar 17, 9:03 AM
    • 3,647 Posts
    • 20,296 Thanks
    carbootcrazy
    • #7
    • 10th Mar 17, 9:03 AM
    • #7
    • 10th Mar 17, 9:03 AM
    Hi, VelvetFreak. Your mention of Dave Ramsey reminded me of another challenge that Hillwalker might be interested in.

    Someone set up a £1000 Emergency Fund Challenge at the end of 2014 after listening to Dave Ramsey. He now has 225 members (after fearing initially that he'd only get a handful). It's a nice, supportive group and something you might like to have a look at, Hillwalker. Looks as if you are already well on your way with your current Emergency savings anyway. £1000 is a lot easier to aim for than the 3 month one, although I do both now my £1000 pot is full and ready and waiting for the next emergency to hit

    Link here:

    http://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/showthread.php?t=5076051
    Last edited by carbootcrazy; 10-03-2017 at 9:05 AM.
    Make £10 A Day Challenge 2017. Jan-Apr: £1240.02. May: £380.96
    3-6 Months Emergency Fund Challenge #12: £1200.00/£3000. This is such hard going but I will do it.

    Original Debt: £56804 (@ LBM 02/13). Paid : £32316. Balance: £24488
    • Tonkaaaa
    • By Tonkaaaa 10th Mar 17, 9:38 AM
    • 18 Posts
    • 25 Thanks
    Tonkaaaa
    • #8
    • 10th Mar 17, 9:38 AM
    • #8
    • 10th Mar 17, 9:38 AM
    Looks as though you have everything going in the right direction! I've been through the wringer with gambling and have come out the other side. I found the biggest problem was I didn't see the money because it was all online! Once I overcame that it suddenly hit me that I was being an absolute berk not just to me because that doesn't matter but to my family, that's when it really hit home.

    Anyway, good luck with your endeavours, we have a similar amount to pay off hopefully we can stay motivated!
    Yesterday you said tomorrow.
    • Hillwalker17
    • By Hillwalker17 15th Mar 17, 1:44 PM
    • 59 Posts
    • 118 Thanks
    Hillwalker17
    • #9
    • 15th Mar 17, 1:44 PM
    • #9
    • 15th Mar 17, 1:44 PM
    0Well it's only been about 9 days since I started this journey and I couldn't keep it together for that long. DISASTER. I've been careless on the gambling front again. I sat on the laptop the other night, logged in to MSE and wanted to do my update which I was happy about, but instead I gambled.....ALOT....

    I don't really know why, I don't know if it's the buzz or the money aspect, but for some reason I do it. The 10K loan wasn't fully blown thankfully, but lets just say the majority of it was

    This was my financial situation before I got the 10k and see updates now

    Loan 1 - £3.6k (Paid off £2.6k - balance now 1k)
    Loan 2 - £3.4k
    Loan 3 - £1.2k - (FULLY PAID OFF)
    Credit Card £1.4k

    Loans 2 and the credit card haven't been touched..Ahhh how could I have been so careless...

    And the news gets better..In the panic that I thought I couldn't pay the next 2 months loan payments, now totallying around £1400 until the 1k is paid off (2 months), I applied for more loans.

    £6k over 2 years at £270 a month
    £15.5k over 4 years at £490 a month

    I know everyone is thinking WHY and what a careless idiot. Trust me I think the same. The larger loan hasn't been accepted yet and as it was going to take 2 days to review due to the amount, I applied for the smaller one straight away and it was accepted. I'm waiting for the money to be transferred to my account. If I get the larger one as well, I will pay off everything else and just have that one for 4 years.

    Now, there is nothing I can do about it and the only way for me to move on is to stop gambling. I've said this time and time again though. For years and i'm still bloody doing it. It has affected my heath, sleeping and stress over the last few days and i'm sure some people with be wondering why i'm so tired.

    Plan, well there is no point having one because I never stick to it. What I have done is uninstalled all banking apps on my mobile and I plan on cutting up my debit cards/credit card. If I need cash out the bank i'll need to pop into the local branch with some paperwork and ID.

    On the only positive note, I have £900 in my emergency fund still in cash squirreled away. Why hasn't this been spent.. because I only do online gambling so if it's in cash I can't use it.

    This has been a hard update to post as I know the majority of you reading this will judge and think i'm reckless, which I know I am. I physically can't gamble without a debit or credit card so maybe this is the first of many steps? Maybe if I do a step a day it will keep me on track.

    Step 1 into my recovery - Get rid off my 2 debit cards and the credit card so I can't use them... needs to be done asap so I don't do anything stupid.

    There is so much I want to write and say, but I feel it's probably pointless and I'll keep it for tomorrow. I'm planning on doing daily updates as I think it will help me concentrate.

    Until tomorrow, please don't be as stupid as me.

    HW17
    Last edited by Hillwalker17; 15-03-2017 at 1:55 PM.
    Ex Gambling Addict - Last bet made on 15/03/2017 - 29 Days
    Slowly building an emergency fund - £1000/£6000
    • Hillwalker17
    • By Hillwalker17 16th Mar 17, 11:00 PM
    • 59 Posts
    • 118 Thanks
    Hillwalker17
    Day 1 of recoveryÖ.

    I plucked up the courage to phone Zopa and I cancelled the application for the larger £15.5k loan. I didnít need this as the smaller £6k was on its way. I suppose this was a sensible decision as I donít want to be paying loans at all after the next 2 years.

    The £6k (other loan) arrived in the bank. I overpaid Loan 1 by another £500, bringing its balance down to £500 or thereabouts.

    I tried to pay off loan 2 via internet banking, but I wasnít sure if I put in the correct details for the sort code and account number, so instead of paying off the full amount and later realising it was the wrong details, I paid £500 towards it. I will check the balance of the loan on Monday and if itís decreased by around £500, I know Iíve done it right and can pay the rest off

    The credit card has been cut up and paid off in full Ė all £1236.00!!!

    I think Iíll get charged a little interest on it so I will wait until the next statement before closing it. I cant use it at all unless I order another card which I WONT be doing.

    With paying £1k (£500 x 2) and the credit card off, I have about £3.8k left in my account.

    Financial status at the moment:

    Loan 1 - £3.6k (Paid off £2.6k - balance now 1k) (Balance now £500)
    Loan 2 - £3.4k (Paid off £500, Balance around £2.8k).
    Loan 3 - £1.2k - (FULLY PAID OFF)
    Credit Card £1.4k (FULLY PAID OFF)


    Not forgetting my two new best friends who I will be sharing the next 24 months with..

    Santander Loan - £10k Ė 24 months left at £450 a month
    Hitachi Loan £6k Ė 24 months left at £285 a month

    Feeling more positive today although a little sad. Itís all suddenly dawned on me that Iím going to be financially strapped for the next 24 months, instead of the 12 months which I had only last week.

    My aim yesterday was

    "Step 1 into my recovery - Get rid off my 2 debit cards and the credit card so I can't use them... needs to be done asap so I don't do anything stupid".

    The credit card has been cut up but I canít cut up the debit cards until everything is paid off. Hopefully this should be done soon. Some progress is good though?

    Moving onto the gambling front - I resent it at the moment as I know my addiction has caused this mess. I'm trying to concentrate on all the nice things I could have purchased with the money I wasted and it makes me sick. Maybe I need this sick feeling, I don't know. I think keeping busy is the key and I am working the weekend so that should help.

    Day 1 complete. Aim's for tomorrow is to withdraw £250 in cash from the bank and add this to my emergency fund. I also wan't to read a few chapters of my book as this will get me less stressed

    Onwards and upwards they say

    HW17
    Ex Gambling Addict - Last bet made on 15/03/2017 - 29 Days
    Slowly building an emergency fund - £1000/£6000
    • moneyfacts
    • By moneyfacts 17th Mar 17, 6:45 AM
    • 61 Posts
    • 101 Thanks
    moneyfacts
    Please get professional help with your gambling.

    Getting loans to clear other loans and credit cards isn't "paying off anything" you're just increasing your debts. If you have loan money in your account, at least use it all to pay your highest interest debt.

    Good luck with the journey.
    • ada-or-ardor
    • By ada-or-ardor 17th Mar 17, 7:20 AM
    • 115 Posts
    • 391 Thanks
    ada-or-ardor
    I agree with moneyfacts, you need professional help. You have an addiction. It's very unlikely you will cure yourself: that's why support groups etc exist. It would be just awful if you blew the rest of the new 6k loan again.....

    Does your OH know about your debt and gambling?

    Best of luck.

    Ada
    • Hillwalker17
    • By Hillwalker17 17th Mar 17, 11:19 PM
    • 59 Posts
    • 118 Thanks
    Hillwalker17
    Thank you both for your comments. I completely agree that I need help. I suppose it's like telling an alcoholic that they need to stop drinking. The person wants to but often slips up, having binges. I want to be like cantcope (user on here) who is over 10 years gambling free, looking back and thinking how much better his life is

    I tried to download Gamcare onto my android phone. I paid £30 for the subscription but the app crashes and it won't install (I really want it to), so I need to find an alternative. The first month is £30, and then its another £100 for the year, which in the grand scheme of my gambling debts, is nothing at all. I need to email the company as I don't want them taking payment when the app won't work.

    My partner knows about my past gambling issues and the debts from it. She doesn't know about this new stuff. I want to tell her, but am fearful she will leave me, chuck me out the house and i'll have nowhere to go. Reading that last sentence makes me sound so selfish... which I suppose I am

    She knows I've got a about £1k a month to pay off in debts, but believes it's all finished at the end of 2017. I will be paying these two new loans until early 2019 so I need to get them either paid off earlier or tell her. She will be expecting me to have more spare cash next year.

    I checked online banking today for loan 2 and it's balance is down £500 from my over payment yesterday. A simple transfer of another £2k to the loan means it's balance should be around £700 ish.

    So that leaves me £500 ish to pay off for loan 1 and about £700 for loan 2. Once they are fully paid it just leaves me with the two new loans to concentrate on.

    I didn't manage to withdraw any cash today and I didn't have time to read (partner roped me into house chores).

    Day 2 achieved all ok with no gambling issues. I'm popping into work from 10-2 tomorrow to finish off a project for Monday and my office boss has said I can get 4 hours paid overtime for it. No problem I said

    I know I can do this...I wan't to do this.

    HW17
    Ex Gambling Addict - Last bet made on 15/03/2017 - 29 Days
    Slowly building an emergency fund - £1000/£6000
    • ada-or-ardor
    • By ada-or-ardor 18th Mar 17, 8:34 AM
    • 115 Posts
    • 391 Thanks
    ada-or-ardor
    Well done hillwalker on 2 days already. Youve got this. Maybe you could find a gambling forum too, for more specific gambling support and more users during the inevitable times of temptation. Or even look into local Gamblers Anonymous groups near you. It's no sign of failure to admit you need some real help, in addition to deleting apps etc.

    Definitely contact the app company.

    I understand why you would be scared to tell your partner, but a) it might make you more accountable and b) she probably deserves the ugly but honest truth in my opinion. If i were in her situation, sure I'd be angry and disappointed but i wouldn't end my relationship over it. If i found out some other way and found I'd been lied to...... That would be a whole different ball game.

    Just my humble opinion :-)

    Good luck!
    • carbootcrazy
    • By carbootcrazy 18th Mar 17, 10:49 AM
    • 3,647 Posts
    • 20,296 Thanks
    carbootcrazy
    Sorry, Hillwalker, I've been catching up on your posts but had very little time or opportunity to reply. I've changed internet service providers and am having a few set-up issues.


    Well done on taking it one day at a time and taking the trouble to post regularly on here. I strongly believe that accountability for our actions (even though it's only to virtual friends via this or other online facilities) is a massive step towards taking back control of our lives.


    I agree with ada to some extent over the telling your partner issue. I know from my debt troubles that I had become more and more bad-tempered, tetchy, irritable, anxious (all the traits that I hated and didn't want). I still never breathed a word about my debts to my partner (I still haven't) and trying to act as if everything was normal and manage my lifestyle as if nothing had changed was a huge strain over several years. I'm amazed that I didn't make myself really ill over it


    Things have eased so much since being on a DMP as, although still doing everything I can to live a frugal life and get my debts paid off asap, I feel I'm in control of my debts rather than them controlling me IYKWIM. I personally feel I've passed the stage where I knew I must tell my partner (even though I never actually did it) and I don't intend to do so now. I feel I've got away with it, the worst part anyway, and will soldier on to the bitter end with him completely in the dark. I'm not proud of this but it was how it needed to be for me


    I think you should have a long think though about what happens after your partner expects you to be debt-free and you aren't. Your partner is already aware of some of your debts so your situation and mine are completely different. How are you going to explain your constant frugality and lack of money for more years than she expects? It looks as if some of your expenses are joint ones (unlike us where responsibility for spending in the relationship has always been clearly defined and separate) and this may cause issues if/when your partner expects you to contribute more. I suppose you could leave the discussions over that for a later date but you'll have to address them one day.


    The best aspect of being on a DMP (and I'm not advocating one for you, you're not in need of such a drastic remedy yet) is that there's no access to credit. Absolutely none. It's not just a case of cutting up credit cards, creditors have closed accounts and rendered them useless. So, no more overdrafts or personal loans either as my credit score is trashed. The only money I can spend is money that I actually have. The prospect of this at the start of the DMP was genuinely terrifying but I came to terms with the situation pretty quickly and feel so much more relaxed about money now. I certainly can't make random and inadvised spending choices. If you can stick to never using your cards you'll really make headway on clearing your existing debts but please, please, please don't apply for any more loans! You're in the fortunate position (well, maybe that's a debatable point in your case) where lenders are still willing to lend money to you but alarm bells might start to ring for lenders one day and you'll be suddenly left with nowhere to turn for extra money. Start adapting your lifestyle to cope without that financial crutch.


    I'm sorry this post might sound a bit preachy (certainly not my intention) and I genuinely want to help you. You've got all your life ahead of you with so many wonderful possibilities to take advantage of. Please don't blow them
    Last edited by carbootcrazy; 18-03-2017 at 10:55 AM.
    Make £10 A Day Challenge 2017. Jan-Apr: £1240.02. May: £380.96
    3-6 Months Emergency Fund Challenge #12: £1200.00/£3000. This is such hard going but I will do it.

    Original Debt: £56804 (@ LBM 02/13). Paid : £32316. Balance: £24488
    • Hillwalker17
    • By Hillwalker17 20th Mar 17, 1:49 AM
    • 59 Posts
    • 118 Thanks
    Hillwalker17
    Hello everyone. I'm alive and don't worry, I've not gone AWOL

    I was gutted that I couldn't log on over the weekend. Saturday was a really busy day for me as I had to stay at work longer than expected to finish something and by the time I got home, some family came round for dinner. They didn't leave till it was late.

    Today me and the Mrs went for a drive and we took some lunch with us (all very MSE) I was nice to relax and we got absolutely soaked whilst walking in the rain on the beach

    Thanks for the input Ada, I believe your right with the partner aspect. If tables were turned, I would expect the truth, especially after being together so long. The only difficult I find with it is that I have obviously been lying for so long, so much will come out and I reckon she would end it. She did say last time that if it happens again it would be over

    carbootcrazy - Thanks so much for your post. I totally agree with the accountability factor whilst posting on here. It's motivation and support that you wouldn't normally get. I totally see your point too about the partner aspect. You know what it's like hiding things and the stress that can come from it. It's one of those things which I don't want to tackle but at some stage it might have to be done.

    The Mrs expects me to be debt free at the end of this year, but I have another 15 months after that of loan payments. I think the only way to manage that would be to save as much as I can between now and the end of the year, and use that savings to either pay off the loans or pretend I save it next year. I suppose either way it's going to be something which I have to address. We are also going to up our joint payments next year to £1K a month, which would result in us jointly saving about £500 a month. This would be our first real effort at saving together. I should just be able to make that £1K payment, along with my loans, but it means I wouldn't be able to save much myself.

    I've taken your advice on board - trust me. I know you speak sense as you have "been there". I won't be applying for any more credit now everything is settled and calm. I still find it absolutely bananna's that lenders can offer you £15.5K loans when I had a credit card neary maxed, 3 other loans and a pretty dismal credit score. No wonder the majority of the country is in a mess

    I still have the credit card account to close down along with paying off the two loans, but this shouldn't be a drama.It will be good to get these away and to concentrate on either saving or overpaying the loans.

    Good news - I managed to get the Gamblock App working. It basically resets the phone, deleting any apps it thinks is related to gambling and blocking all gambling sites. It even blocked my fantasy football app

    I've still got the £900 emergency fund and I've got another £30 set aside for a weekend away in April.

    I have two bank accounts. Bank 1 is where all my bills come out off and I transfer £1050 over here every month to cover everything. There is about £1500 in there, but about £1200 of it will be used for paying off the 2 loans.

    Bank 2 is an old account, which I use for card payments etc. I will now use this as my everyday card spending account. It has about £230 in it and this should last for about 2-3 months if I use it to cover my fuel, everyday spending and online purchases. This way the balance of bank 1 should creep up without me knowing. I know I said I might destroy the debit cards, but i'm still considering this as I shouldn't the one belonging to bank one.

    Days 3 and 4 smashed and i'm happy with progress. Absolutely knackered so i'm calling for a lie in tomorrow.

    HW17
    Ex Gambling Addict - Last bet made on 15/03/2017 - 29 Days
    Slowly building an emergency fund - £1000/£6000
    • carbootcrazy
    • By carbootcrazy 20th Mar 17, 8:02 AM
    • 3,647 Posts
    • 20,296 Thanks
    carbootcrazy
    Well done so far, HW. Great post by the way


    Just one word of caution about credit cards if you don't mind. By all means cut them up if you feel you can't trust yourself to have them available to use but whatever you do don't actually pay off and then close all of them. If you need a new one anytime in the future (and it's likely that you will) it might be harder for you to get one if you've a poor credit score and a lot of outstanding debt. Not saying you won't get one but those available might be the higher-interest type and you'll be back on the repayment spiral again


    Wishing you a happy and successful week ahead
    Make £10 A Day Challenge 2017. Jan-Apr: £1240.02. May: £380.96
    3-6 Months Emergency Fund Challenge #12: £1200.00/£3000. This is such hard going but I will do it.

    Original Debt: £56804 (@ LBM 02/13). Paid : £32316. Balance: £24488
    • Cherryfudge
    • By Cherryfudge 20th Mar 17, 11:10 AM
    • 305 Posts
    • 691 Thanks
    Cherryfudge
    Hi Hillwalker

    I've just read your diary - well done for taking lots of positive steps to tackle your finances!

    A few things stand out to me: you are tackling the finances but I'm not sure that, despite acknowledging the gambling is a problem, you are actually doing absolutely all you might to tackle it. The blocker on your phone is a great idea and so is posting on here. However, you haven't, as far as I can see, done anything to make yourself accountable in the outside world (joining a support group, telling your partner). Sorry if I'm wrong here, I don't know you and don't have any right to tell you what to do so these are just my thoughts.

    Other than that: is your weak point your late nights when no one can see you and your resistance is down? Could you leave your phone/laptop at work? Is there a way you can block Internet access after your partner has gone to bed or is out of the house? Could you make a habit-tracking chart to give yourself positive strokes for every daily habit that sets you in the right direction? Is there a trusted person apart from your partner that you could talk to about how to start telling her? Once you've talked out loud to one person, telling her may come more easily.

    I think you said you gamble when bored. I was going to suggest you take up running then thought again - if you're really a hill walker and that's not a cunning disguise ( ), then that would be a good option for you: all those endorphins, vitamin D and physical tiredness will help you resist the urge to sabotage yourself, which is exactly what you're doing. Somewhere inside there are two Hillwalkers battling it out and one is a cunning devil who will try to stop the other. Walking's not likely to be much of an option late at night but a good book goes a long way to correcting that and helping you wind down.

    It's going to be a long hard fight but you've done the very difficult first bit. The next steps, especially bringing it into 'real life' are going to be hard too, but folks here will cheer you on and have lots of helpful suggestions.

    Best of luck and please keep posting
    • Hillwalker17
    • By Hillwalker17 20th Mar 17, 9:59 PM
    • 59 Posts
    • 118 Thanks
    Hillwalker17
    carbootcrazy - I agree with your thinking about the credit card, closing it could be costly and I might not get another one. I only have the one and its got a £1250 limit (balance is £0). The card is destroyed but i'm not sure what i'm going to do with the account. I think the fact that I "should" be able to save about £300 a month for the rest of the year means I won't require credit. I also have the emergency fund to fall back on too I suppose

    Good thinking though and appreciate the thought. I will have a think about my options in the next few weeks

    Hi Cherryfudge and thanks for posting. I previously got counseling for the gambling, but absolutely hated it, to the fact that it was making the problem worse. I far rather speak to random people on here and look forward to the advice they give. If I can continue things the way they are going, its all going in the right direction. The block on my phone is great, even though I haven't had to use it yet.

    I like your suggestion about running. I've never been a runner at all, but I do walk a lot. I have a 4 year German Shepard so i'm out normally twice a day. I do the occasional bit of walking uphill, but nothing like those big hills they call "Munro's" or whatever. Where I stay (North of England area), it's more flat

    I do love reading a good book and i'm about half way through a good one at the moment. I'm away to bed now to get in a few chapters before I fall asleep. Monday is normally a long and stressful day at work and today didn't disappoint

    Hopefully tomorrow is better. It will soon be a week

    HW17
    Ex Gambling Addict - Last bet made on 15/03/2017 - 29 Days
    Slowly building an emergency fund - £1000/£6000
    • Hillwalker17
    • By Hillwalker17 21st Mar 17, 3:47 PM
    • 59 Posts
    • 118 Thanks
    Hillwalker17
    Afternoon

    After reading other peoples diary's, I see some people go by "no spend days" or NSD's for short. Its when someone doesn't spend any money, other that the planned direct debits etc. I think I will start aiming for a NSD a lot more, with a view to saving my money.

    Bank 2 stands at exactly £230 and I aim for this to last until at least the end of June. At least today was a NSD and I haven't got any plans to spend money for the rest of the week. Just home from work as the boss told me I could get off at 2pm seeing as though I was in on Saturday

    Going to spend the rest of the afternoon doing house chores, walking the hairy beast (dog ) and reading another few chapters.

    We have rain and hailstones at the moment. I sure hope it dries up for the weekend. No wonder the dog is hiding behind the couch, probably thinking there no way hes going out in that weather.

    Quick question for the readers - how many bank accounts and savings accounts do you have. Is it normal to have a few?

    HW17
    Ex Gambling Addict - Last bet made on 15/03/2017 - 29 Days
    Slowly building an emergency fund - £1000/£6000
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