Christmas for adult children

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Becles
Becles Posts: 13,167 Forumite
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edited 21 October 2014 at 5:23PM in Marriage, relationships & families
My eldest is 18 at the end of November. He's at college full time so he's still fully financially dependent on me.

I was teasing him yesterday saying now he's an adult, he'll just be getting a token £10 gift for Christmas while his younger brother and sister will still be getting a big pile of presents from Santa! I will still spend the same on him as I usually do.

I was just wondering when did you stop buying the child like stack of presents for adult children? Is it more when they are financially independent or did you stop at a certain age?

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  • provista_2
    provista_2 Posts: 197 Forumite
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    Mine are 23 & 20 and we still buy a pile. It's just a smaller pile with smaller parcels but more expensive.:rotfl::snow_laug:snow_laug
  • Generali
    Generali Posts: 36,411 Forumite
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    When I hit adulthood it just kinda tapered off, bit by bit. I think partly I carried on getting presents because I really got into cooking and my Mum wanted to encourage me.

    Each year I'd get a really nice knife or some cookbooks and a decent pan or something.
  • elsien
    elsien Posts: 32,902 Forumite
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    My mum and I have a deal. Santa still visits both of us, with one main present and various stocking fillers to unwrap so it still looks like a bagful. Chocolate is obligatory. She's 75...
    All shall be well, and all shall be well, and all manner of things shall be well.

    Pedant alert - it's could have, not could of.
  • pinkshoes
    pinkshoes Posts: 20,120 Forumite
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    Santa stopped visiting me when my son was born. (So age 31...!)
    Should've = Should HAVE (not 'of')
    Would've = Would HAVE (not 'of')

    No, I am not perfect, but yes I do judge people on their use of basic English language. If you didn't know the above, then learn it! (If English is your second language, then you are forgiven!)
  • Counting_Pennies_2
    Counting_Pennies_2 Posts: 3,979 Forumite
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    I think Christmas should be special for as long as possible.


    It shows you care and want to indulge with love. Indulge seems vulgar to say the word indulge these days, but I was never indulged by love or gifts.


    Aged 13 I was just given a small amount cash or a voucher.


    It hurt then and I still can't understand it now.


    For me gifts that have been chosen with love is very important.


    The treats can change as they get older. It must get harder now CDs and DVDs have become downloadable. So maybe stocking items of smellies and nice underwear and nightwear and perhaps having treats such as theatre trips.


    Keep loving, caring, treating and having fun for as long as you can.


    Perhaps when a wife is on the scene chat about doing the ho ho!
  • Spendless
    Spendless Posts: 24,174 Forumite
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    It tapered off as I grew older. I didn't leave my parents house until I was in my late 20s. I never had an actual stocking (Mum says the ones you buy nowadays weren't commercially available when I was a child - we didn't use a sock) but stocking filler presents eg chocolate coins were wrapped up and under the tree with other items, those stopped as did the obligatory set of underwear meant to last you the whole year. It went down more when I moved out and then again when I had children.
  • 74jax
    74jax Posts: 7,929 Forumite
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    I love Christmas, I love birthdays, I love any day when I surprise friends or families with something I've bought for them.

    My DD will still have the same amount for as long as I can afford it, or I have grand kids I think.

    That said, now she is older I tend to surprise and treat her more throughout the year then just birthdays and Christmas.

    It's obviously rubbed off on her as she bought me 5 seconds of summer last week because she was in hmv and saw it and knew I loved the Amnesia song. She text me to say she was so excited as she had a surprise for me she knew I would love.

    Bless, she's so like me!
    Forty and fabulous, well that's what my cards say....
  • CH27
    CH27 Posts: 5,531 Forumite
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    I cut my son's down to £50 when he was 18. I did talk to him about it first & he was absolutely fine with it.

    We don't go overboard on xmas in our family & I like to spoil people on their birthday.
    Try to be a rainbow in someone's cloud.
  • bossymoo
    bossymoo Posts: 6,924 Forumite
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    My mum still gets me a gift of sorts - maybe cosmetics or similar.

    I think I stopped getting a "pile" when I moved out - it started being more practical things then, eg my dad arranged for his brother (a painter and decorator) to sort my living room and paid for a new carpet.

    When I was at uni my mum still organised a selection of gifts, but in part it was because things weren't happy at home and she was trying to improve things. Parents separated shortly after, I bought my own place and that's when the transition into "grown up" happened.

    If money isn't a huge issue, then I'd be tempted to get him a few bits. But I'm also a believer in only giving gifts that would be used, not just buying things for the sake of giving.
    Bossymoo

    Away with the fairies :beer:
  • duchy
    duchy Posts: 19,511 Forumite
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    I do think if he's financially dependent on you as he's still studying then a token gift woulld be stingy (especially if presents for the younger siblings are plentiful as they'd be opening them together) but at 18 the main present would be more likely to not be a surprise but something they wanted/needed and the surprises would be in the bits and pieces.
    I Would Rather Climb A Mountain Than Crawl Into A Hole

    MSE Florida wedding .....no problem
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