Advice on moving out of London

Although I have only lived in around one area for 90% of my life, I do have many friends & relatives with mixed experiences.

These are the things I would look at:

Do you have any connections anywhere and would that make a difference?
Do have an area of the country that feels good to you when you visit?
I don't share GreyQueen's experience, but I think different parts of the country differ greatly. In many parts of the south (and a few north) villages are seen as "life style choices" rather than communities.
Whilst I agree about the renting, I would take a step further back.

I would begin by taking short breaks in areas you think might be likely. Drive around, buy the local paper, poke about a bit.
Then take a week or two's holiday there. See what sort of things you might join in with if you lived there. Go to the pubs, use the leisure centre, join in with some activity.
After that I would consider renting.

I would set yourself a time limit after retirement to find somewhere (maybe 2, or 3 years) If it hasn't worked out, then stay where you are with a positive attitude.
I have had 2 lots of friends who have been "looking" for over 10 years - it actually means they don't really do anything.

Caterina wrote: »

Thank you all, so far you are telling me things that I had already thought about, but it is really interesting to read the individual experiences, including Gilly1964's uncle and aunt, the issue about transport and familiarity with the facilities of a city. It will all go on the weighing scales when we finally decide.

Above all, I am grateful for your responses because I shall show DH all of them and he can also use other people's experiences to think about this. He is village born and bred but lived in London most of his adult life. I was city born and bred (Rome) and lived in London longer than I have lived in Italy, so our experiences are mixed.

What about a smaller city or a cultural town?

We moved a few years ago from somewhere VERY rural to somewhere rural but less so. It was a compromise, and we live with it. The benefits are better access to transport and town facilities, ( we have choice of restaurants even!). The other aspect for us is that my husband works in London. We are within an hour and. Half of London, and the aim is I will get well enough one day to resume socialising in London semi regularly.

We don't often talk about retirement for both of us because its not that likely but I consider that if it were it would be possible for us to stay here financially, but .....probably unlikely. I wouldn't mind London, but think it more likely we'd end up in a little town/ big village with good restaurants and cultural life and train links, or a small city ...somewhere like Bath ( but probably not bath) . A 'property swap' value for value should give us some choice I hope.

Fwiw DH is Anglo Italian, school there though, and I think things like the difference in how things are regionally appointed ( culturally, commercially, is worth considering...depending on your interests and shopping habits. Being near somewhere where we could buy real bread and vegetables and and meat from a butcher and fish from a fishmonger were all important to us. We need a car for most of these though. The fishmonger is a twenty minute drive away.


Otoh, we are also within twenty minutes of an outstanding cultural facility, and an hour each way of two cities.

We did look at meet up for some Italian speaking groups, particularly some with mother tongue speakers just for occasional meet ups, and there is one but its based on the far side of one of the cities and is all Brits learning Italian.... In no way does my DH want to be part of an Italian speaking ghetto where we live, just to have some.......linguistic and cultural outlet in a place that assumes he is Brit.

Pushed I would always choose truly rural over urban, and I think London is an amazing city, one of my favourites in the world.

Caterine just thought I'd put my twopenneth in! I was brought up in Sussex, living in a middle sized town but with a huge garden, a mum that grew loads of fruit and veg and a hobby that involved falling off horses!
I lived in Brighton whilst at uni and then moved to darkest South Wales where my folks had decamped to. They had bought somewhere with a few acres for horses, pigs, goats, hens, duck etc with orchard and veg patch. They lived in the sticks but within a couple of miles of Abergavenny a bustling market town.
The only pointers I can offer is from our own experiences;
1. its a pain to drive everywhere or be driven if you dont drive. There is very little or no public transport.
2. The countryside is noisy and often smelly or both! During busy times tractors and machinery can go 24/7 in a field next to you or up and down the roads.
3. You do have to make the effort to meet people although shared interests usually offer an opener.
4. Country pursuits can be "alien" to people who move into the area, I'm talking hunting (on horses or with guns/dogs), shooting as in pest control and fishing. I'm fine with all three but its not for the squemish or "PC", I had two pheasants newly shot left as a welcome present!
5. I would not swap it for the world! You just have to appreciate different things, the persistant robin that pecks the window until you put food out, the daily changes to the scenery, the lack of traffic hum, swapping rude drivers for mad locals who say hi whilst whistling past you in the lane (you'll get used to diving into the hedge or reversing).
6. You need to be prepared (see SHTF thread) you cant nip to the shop easily so you need to keep in supplies. My mum a snowaphobe! used to ensure she had enough loo paper, UHT milk , candles, food etc etc to not put her nose out the door for several weeks if neccessary! We had a multi fuel cooker and open fires to ensure warmth, cooking and hot water in the event of no power, generator to run the freezer and enough blankets and thermals to hibernate in!

I hope you follow your dream but still have plan B if you dont like it. The farmers around here have a saying its not escape to the Country its p*ss off back to the town! (not personal!!) E.g. the solicitors who moved in next to my friends farm and then wrote furious complaints letters due to the smell and noise, it was a chicken farm, been there for forty + years!

The pheasant present thing happens here too, in the more rural parts of the district. I'd be dead chuffed & cook 'em (without hanging) but most of my menfolk would refuse to eat them - they always think it's roadkill when I serve up pheasant, even though mostly it comes from the local butchers.

Not all genuine country people love hunting, BTW. I'm a poultry keeper but it's up to me to keep my birds safe; the fox is only after feeding his family too. I wouldn't go sabbing but I will (and always have) argue my point that it's not necessary, it's atavistic and dangerous; I've known too many good horses die from an unlucky jump and one of my childhood friends is in a wheelchair because of it.