What To Do?

kez1234 · 19 January 2007 at 1:33PM

hi all hope someone can help,

my son goes to school every morning and loved it until about 2 weeks ago i noticed he was coming home rather withdrawn, i asked him what was wrong but he said nothing,i have now found out that he is being shouted at by a dinner lady, she is singling him out, and shouts very loudly at him, she also lives by where we live, and is friends with another women whos children are disruptive to say the least, they all like bullying and lying, this dinner lady spoke to one of the womans daughters the other day at the school gate and she said that she saw my son hold another lad by the throat i was concerned and rang the school who said it had not happened although this dinner lady shouted again at my son who asked if he had done this on the word of a 14yr old girl,
my husband went round and politely asked this dinner lady to stop shouting at my son and she started shouting at him but what really upset me was she said we abuse our children, by SHOUTING AT THEM also someone has said that my partner is not there dad, this has also came from the school, but not sure yet if it is her,she laughed and said make a complaint then, i and many other people have had problems with this dinner lady before and a lot have taken their children out of the school because of her, i have now asked to speak to the head but no-one has got back to me yet, i have also phoned the lea who have been very helpful and told me what to do,

any help thanks

irishesman · 19 January 2007 at 1:46PM

Had exactly the same problem with my eldest daughter (6) except it was with a teaching assistant who was also supervising lunches etc. All the children call her Mrs Boss xxxxx (surname removed). She very large (to put it pollitely) and must be very intimidating to 6 year old children. She is known to regularly shout at children and we've had numerous tears about it.

At first we just thought it was tall tales from DD as no other parents have aid anything, but on asking round this is a faily regular occurence. It all came to a head at the christmas play when she started talking to my wife as if she was a 6 yearold because she wasn't sitting in the correct place. On top of this, she then told every other parent she talked to about it and made sure my wife heard this.

Anyway, my wife made an appointment with the head and made a formal complaint about her. We haven't heard anything back, but the woman isn't being bossy at the moment.

Anyway, stand your ground and see the head. He/she may not know whats going on!

kez1234 · 19 January 2007 at 2:56PM

this has happened before last year but there was trouble within the school about teachers and pupils, the head , deputy head and a lot of teachers left, so i will have to see what this new head says, the governors are all also new,

Spendless · 19 January 2007 at 3:03PM

Sorry I'm a bit confused with you saying your son goes every morning to school? Nursery/Pre-school age? Why does he have to be there at lunch-time, don't they come home?

kez1234 · 19 January 2007 at 3:05PM

i mean when he goes to school in the morning, he's 10

Justie · 19 January 2007 at 3:06PM

keep a log of events and complain to the head and the board of governers. Bullying in school should be taken seriously whether it comes from staff or pupils.

BusyGirl · 19 January 2007 at 3:12PM

If the Head doesn't deal with the problem then contact the LEA and they will contact the Head to see what he/she is doing. If you feel that your son is being 'bullied' by this lady, then perhaps you could ask about the school's anti-bullying policy. It is important that you get ALL of the facts from your son beforehand, even if he has done something wrong.

kez1234 · 19 January 2007 at 3:21PM

my son has a deformed ear which causes him a little trouble, but when he gets picked on about this she doesn't do anything, if anyone on the other hand complains about my child or certain others she shouts at them, other than my son being bullied, what does upset me is that she has shouted that i abuse my children. my daughter heard this from her window and was very upset, has she obviously knows different, she thinks she is a teacher, she talks to a lot of people like it, but if you tell her anything about what her children have done she just says they wouldn't do that. i phoned kidscape today and said she sounds like she needs to see someone has i went into the story more, she also said that when someone says things like that, and it is a lie then their experience is that her home needs to be assessed because they have a problem

BusyGirl · 19 January 2007 at 3:28PM

I would not hesitate to make a formal complaint about this lady. Do not approach her yourself , but go straight to the Head. She is in a position of trust and has no right to make personal comments about any of the children in her care or about their backgrounds.

kez1234 · 19 January 2007 at 3:47PM

well school said they might phone me today when school finished but they haven't the dinner lady in question wasn't at school today and guess what?????? son has come home in a great mood!!!!!!!!

Mumstheword · 19 January 2007 at 4:06PM

We have one dinner lady like that. But the kids seem to love her. She's awful to them, and I have witnessed her behaviour myself during a 'fun' afternoon. She was yelling at the kids and spoiling their fun.

She looks after the reception kids at lunchtime. She just doesnt have a clue. She used to make DS2 crisp butties with his packed lunch, so he thought she was lovely, but she has yelled at DS3 to eat his dinner before now. DS1 witnessed her once, and went to sit with DS3. He risked a telling off himself by telling DS3 that he had been a good boy for trying his food, it was ok if he didnt like it, and he could eat his afters. All things she had said the opposite to.

I had a quiet word with the head. He said that the kids can eat what they like and take as long as they like, obviously beign encouraged to try new foods. I told him that I was more than happy with the schools way, and knew that was the case, and he offered to keep an eye on her.

I think you'd be best off going to see the head, and be careful to explain that it's just this one woman who appears to be spoiling the otherwise good, happy atmosphere:)

ps, dont make an apointment, just nip in and see the head.

What To Do?

Comments

Confirm your email address to Create Threads and Reply

🚀 Getting Started

Categories

Is this how you want to be seen?

Get our FREE Weekly email full of deals & guides - and it’s spam-free